The Road to Nowhere
by Red not Green
Summary: Half AU. In a world where crew culture is taking over and you discover that the government is just becoming more corrupt, can a group of misfits really change things for the better? The partnership from hell might just trigger a series of events that uncover the truth. Life really is one eventful journey. Contains all Strawhats and has adult themes
1. Of New Acquaintances and Vexations

The road to nowhere

A/N: WARNING! This story contains strong language and some scenes of a violent nature (but no more so then the original manga).

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><p>Glazed eyes stared unfocused on the computer screen in front of a red haired young woman. With a sigh she looked at the hand written document in front of her and started to type it up once more.<p>

'Nami' her line manager called from across the desk, raising her head to show she was listening, she focused on the man with a polite yet unfelt smile.

'Nami!' he gushed, he looked like he was about to have a nervous breakdown any second.

'Do you know where the plan drawings are of the west wing? I can't find them anywhere and need them to show the client, for a meeting, in 15 minutes!' He looked her in the eye in clear panic, sweat glistening his greying brow.

'Yes' Nami replied, 'Dave took them with him to look at before the meeting began, do you need more copies?'

'Ah, no, that will be okay. Thank you.' He sighed out slightly unsure; still looking edgy he proceeded to walk off fiddling with the watch around his wrist.

Nami sighed again as she turned to look outside the window behind her, she was bored. Nami had been excited about getting a job for reputable architecture company Galley-La at first but she was only an administrator and the menial and repetitive work she was given lost its appeal quickly. She was a smart girl; she had a degree in geography and communications, unfortunately that didn't help much in an architecture firm. She needed a job though and this is what she got. Although she would much rather travel the world and see what it had to offer. Dreams can happen; you just needed money for them to become reality.

Of course, she also happened to sit next to the most irritating man she had ever met in her life. Paulie. Said man brought her out of her wistful thoughts by obnoxious coughing. He seemed to go out of his way to tell her daily about how inappropriate she dressed, styled or generally looked. Her skirt was always too short even if it was below the knee or she was actually wearing trousers, she was exposing her chest or her heels were too high, she'd done her hair wrong, her make up was suggestive or something else ridiculous. He once told her that painted red finger nails was, as in common knowledge, a representation of a "lady of the night" and was therefore shocked she would openly paint her nails such colour in an office where men came to work. The guy was a nut job! She was sure if she came to work in a floor length sack, hiding her entire body, he would bloody complain about it.

Still, nothing could be done about him, despite his oddities and probable fear/misunderstanding of all woman, he also happened to be the Vice President of the company. She therefore quickly summarised that he was probably loaded. There were constant rumours about him blowing money in some way or another, gambling mostly, but Nami liked to be on the good side of anyone willing to throw cash away. If some happened to come in her direction she would be more then happy to take it from their pocket. Even if it happened to be from said complete and utter weirdo sat to her left.

He wasn't all that bad looking and he could dress when he wanted to. He was average height for a guy and a medium build but he had the mid length blonde beach boy hair and the tan skin to match. He was probably going for a bad boy look, as sometimes he'd come in with flame prints on his leather jacket and wore loose jeans, sometimes even came in wearing goggles on his head. How he had the cheek to complain about how Nami dressed was beyond her, at least she wore office clothes.

Turning back to her desk, she eyed the clock on the bottom right corner of her screen. 11:52. she would take an early lunch today and escape at midday for an hour, no one would really care. Checking her e-mail inbox to kill those last 8 minutes until freedom, she went through and trashed the ones from reception without opening them. Once she read one, which asked employees not to push the revolving door too hard at the entrance as it can "spin violently, be intimidating and hurt people". She was amazed at the stupidity of the e-mail sent to everyone; then again she was no fool to know that some people had no common sense and genuinely needed to be told. However, having plenty of common sense herself she quickly learned that e-mails from reception were never really worth reading. She suspected about 90% of the office had a similar opinion.

Next she opened one from Ellen, one of the graduates in the design team, asking if she fancied a drink after work with some of the guys. Maybe, she pondered, see how she feels later. Then she opened one with no title from her sister Nojiko, from her fruit and vegetable business, The Mikan Tree, but inwardly groaned when she realised it was one of those annoying chain e-mails. Nami hated been sent these e-mails and she never forwarded them on but always read them all the same. At the top of the window was a drawing of a fantasy style dressed woman in draped cream fabrics with floor length white wings with a sparkle animation over the top of it.

"This is your Guardian Angel" it read, "She is able to grant fortune to those who spread her message". Nami rolled her eyes; she must have been sent 6 similar to this.

"You were sent this by someone who cares deeply for you and wishes you luck for the future by sending you your own Guardian Angel."

"Send this to the people you think deserve their own Guardian Angel and a great fortune will be yours".

"If sent to 10 people or more your fortune will arrive in an hour"

"If sent to 6-9 people your fortune will arrive tomorrow"

"If sent to 3-5 people your fortune will arrive in a week"

"If sent to 1-2 people your fortune will arrive in a month"

"If you do not forward this message of good will, you will experience a month of terrible bad luck."

Close. Drag. Trash.

Once disposed of the e-mail, Nami mentally tutted her sister for sending the stupid thing to her but equally smiled and was grateful for the message it contained, which reading between the lines meant, I'm thinking of you. Pushing out from her desk, she grabbed her handbag from her desk drawer and discretely hiked up her black pencil skirt a couple of inches just to irk Paulie when she walked past him.

The idiot.

Slipping on her grey blazer style jacket, she sauntered around her desk, making sure to get Paulie's attention and plastered on her "pleasant" smile at him whilst politely addressing him.

'I'm going on my lunch Paulie, see you soon.' She made sure to sound chirpy.

She then made her way out of the office making sure to sway her hips slightly from the 5" black Mary Jane shoes she had on. Nami was a petite, slim woman of 21 with full auburn red hair just past shoulder length and big brown expressive eyes. She knew that she was what people would call, pretty and she also knew she had all of the right curves in the right places from the many compliments she received, excluding Paulie. Glancing back at said man before she turned out of the office, she was satisfied to see that he had clearly watched her leaving and smirked at the look of scowling disgust on his face.

Turning back around, she smiled to herself; she did kind of get an ego boost every time she managed to piss the man off. Nami then decided to go to Kokoro's café, a couple of streets but only a 5-minute walk away for lunch. She ran a comfortable and friendly café and occasionally gave Nami free meals, instantly making it one of Nami's favourite places, therefore becoming a regular and always got treated to Kokoro's stories of her youth. Something Nami would never complain about. Free food and good, often amusing, stories would always cheer her up. That's just what Nami needed after her rather boring and uneventful morning.

Walking up the street to Kokoros' the white wave fabric canopy came into view, which hung over the front of the café. Hanging baskets were placed on both sides of the facia and three small white painted iron tables and chairs were placed out front already filled with business types escaping for a sandwich and coffee. Nami walked up to the entrance, which was painted in greens and whites on the outside, which gave it a sense of calm and springtime.

The inside couldn't be more different, however. It was themed like it was the inside of an old fashioned railway station with Kokoro additions. It was complete with Victorian style clock over the counter, railway signals in the corners, a kind of dado rail around the walls, designed to look like train track. Dark wood tables with matching benches or chairs consumed the left half of the cafe, large overhead lamps with huge white fabric shades hung from above. There was a small "waiting area" by the entrance, which just consisted of a line of cushioned benches for the take away customers to wait. The large wood panelled "service area" and kitchen occupied the right of the café, dark wooden finishes with brass fixtures and fittings and display cabinets of glass. A painted plywood cut out of a small girl with long blonde pigtails and a huge smile in a station masters hat holding a chalkboard told of the daily specials, Kokoro insisted on naming "her" Chimney and "she" stood by the entrance. Toward the back of the café was a small bar extended and curved around from the service area worktop. A wooden carved mermaid was attached to the wall above the bar. It wasn't really in keeping with the rest of the café and bore a strange resemblance to Kokoro herself but the café in general was eccentric enough that no one questioned it. Customers could sit, eat and drink at the bar and it was often where you found Kokoro with a glass of something or another in her hand laughing good naturedly at whomever the customer might be who happened to sit there.

The café had a cosy feel to it and was apparently designed the way it was in memory to one of Kokoro's past flings who she was quite taken with, well, probably was in love with. He was apparently a train engineer and designed some new revolutionary train track but previously to that was a ship engineer. Perhaps that's where the mermaid came in. They met at a train station in the north moorland somewhere, where Kokoro was working, as a service clerk at the time and the man in question, Tom, was there to do a survey of the area. The rest must have been history and this café is loosely designed from that station where they met. Nami had heard this particular story a few times and supposed it was kind of romantic but as far as she knew Kokoro had never married nor knew what became of this Tom fellow. He had passed away, hearing rumours from the other staff, Nami had picked up that there was an unpleasant incident involving Tom, what she wasn't sure, but it was clearly a touchy subject. The incident was also the catalyst for Kokoro's drinking and could this lady drink.

Nami made her way to the back bar of the café and sat by the counter noticing Kokoro was indeed there topping up a glass of red wine, which she then put to her lips. Nami often wondered why Kokoro got this café licensed. It mostly only sold snacks, hot or cold sandwiches, the odd salad or baked potato. The specials were the only kind of meals you may want an alcoholic accompaniment to. Nami often wondered if the bar was simply for Kokoro's consumption and the licence was simply there for the illusion that it was for the customers. Although some did come in just to drink at the bar. The Irish coffee was rather famous around the area for it's potency but delicious taste.

The café was about half full and would no doubt fill out as the lunch rush got into full swing. Nami sat on one of the bar style stools by the counter and smiled and waved over to Kokoro. There were two other guys sat to her left who seemed to be having some kind of one sided verbal argument. A blonde who was doing all the arguing and a guy with green hair who was calmly eating a sandwich while staring forward. Leaving them to it, Nami settled more in her surroundings as a deep, husky but decidedly female chugging laugh approached her direction.

'Nami my dear, how are you today?' followed by more chuckles.

Kokoro tended to sound drunk when she spoke and laughed, almost like she struggled to get the words out and pronounced properly. This, however, Nami knew was actually a speech impediment. Despite the constant beverage attached to her person, the constant pink blushed cheeks, half lidded grey eyes and lax smiling mouth, Kokoro was never actually drunk despite how much she drank. She was tall; in her early forties with long waist length overly bleached blonde hair. A slightly droopy but good-natured face and a waistline growing from one too many bottles of wine. She often wore a mock station master uniform to work, which consisted of a white shirt with dark red tie and a navy blue trouser suit. Sometimes she would wear a matching cap to complete the ensemble but today it was nowhere to be seen.

'Hi Kokoro, I'm fine thanks. Glad it's lunch time though'. Nami said with a smile on her face. More chuckles followed from Kokoro as she came to rest opposite Nami on the other side of the counter with wine glass and bottle in hand.

'Oh ho, bad day?'

'Not really, just really dull. Even provoking Paulie is loosing its charm'. Nami smirked followed by Kokoro's chuckles.

'That poor man! Having a beautiful young woman teasing him constantly. You're probably causing him an aneurysm'. Kokoro laughed, refilling her wine glass that she had just emptied.

'Perhaps', Nami contemplated, 'the man is an idiot though. Maybe his mother walked around naked in front of him while he was growing up, therefore whenever a woman should pass by showing the slightest part of flesh, be it an elbow or little toe, it conjures up disturbing images for him. It would explain _a lot_'. Nami emphasized the last couple of words, looking serious.

Kokoro just laughed again neither agreeing nor disagreeing, turning around she went to grab a pen and little note pad from the counter behind her.

'What would you like today Nami? We've got some mikan juice in at the moment.' Still ever the good hostess.

'Oh really?' Nami's eyebrows raised, she loved the stuff. She guessed the fruit was coming into season. She'd have to get some from her sister, making a mental note. 'I'd love a glass then and a hot steak sandwich please'.

Kokoro winked at her then made her way over to the kitchen area to place the order. Nami smiled to herself waiting for Kokoro's return and the story of the day she was sure to hear. She glanced over at the guys to her left again. The blonde was still talking away to the other guy but he looked overly smug now and looked like he was telling some elaborate tale, moving his hands in gestures to punctuate his points. The guy with the green hair was still silent and staring forward but he did look beyond annoyed at this point and looked like he was clenching his teeth together going by the tension in his jaw. Nami raised an eyebrow at this, that guy looked like he was ready to explode. Hopefully they'd just hurry up and pay then leave. She was in no mood to have to encounter more idiots this day and she wanted no trouble for Kokoro either.

Turning her back on them slightly Nami was greeted with a glass full of fresh squeezed mikan juice and Kokoro taking a stool this time opposite her and raising her glass of wine to her lips once more. Kokoro gazed across to her other customers at the bar area, chuckled again to herself, fished around under the counter pulling out an unopened bottle of dark rum then slid it down the counter towards the green haired man. This got the men's attention and for the first time they both looked across in Nami's direction. The green haired guy, who was sat closest, looked at the bottle then to Kokoro. He seemed to visibly relax, nodded his head and muttered thanks then moved to look forward once more, opening bottle and drinking it down straight.

He was probably around Nami's age she assumed from the glimpse of his face she saw and was seriously built. Not overly so, like some body builders but this guy clearly had a good physique. His clothes were questionable as the Hawaiian orange short-sleeved shirt clashed horribly with his short tousled green hair and the cream shorts accompanying it seemed just a tad too short for a guy in her opinion, they were more like hot pants. She was beginning to wonder if this guy was maybe gay only to notice that the ensemble was completed with a much worn and slightly scuffed pair of ankle high black leather combat boots and decided that no gay man would ever go out dressed this badly.

She then realised that the blonde sat next to him was beginning to eye her up in a fairly obvious way. When eyes seemed to settle on her bust line and a grin plastered his lips, Nami couldn't help but start to feel a little peeved at the clear lack of tact that this guy possessed. He was also oddly dressed, as he seemed to be in a sport shirt and knee length short combo of the same mauve red fabric with leafy swirls of gold. Was he wearing a curtain or something? Because that's what it really looked like.

Frowning slightly Nami turned more towards Kokoro so she wouldn't have to look at him; she swore she only ever attracted weirdoes. Taking her glass of juice she began taking a sip then addressed the lady opposite her.

'A whole bottle of rum Kokoro? Do you know them?'

An innocent question but Nami didn't really like perverts and if they were fairly regular customers here she'd want the times they came to avoid meeting the blonde again. After taking a huge gulp of wine, Kokoro replied.

'No, not at all. First time I've ever seen them both. I could just tell that green one needed a drink'.

Nami just nodded her head and waited for the story to come.

'Odd guys though. Not sure the green one talks. The blonde seems to have taken a shine to you though dear.'

Kokoro laughed and gestured her head to Nami to look behind her. Nami didn't really want to as she had a sinking feeling that she knew who would be stood there. She didn't want to appear rude, however as he likely would have seen Kokoro's gesture, so swivelled around on her stool.

What she was met with was a face far to close for comfort. A head of sun blonde hair, which came down to the guys jaw line, parted on his right and sweeping over his left eye. A sky blue right eye with the weirdest spiral curled eyebrow above rose as if in question. The worst was the flaring nostrils on his nose, which was just odd, then the lopsided smile that what was barely covering the stench of cigarettes and something garlicky that he had obviously eaten for lunch. Nami had to look downwards briefly taking note of the bum fluff hairs on his chin then going further down only to be met with some of the hairiest legs she had ever seen. The hairs were long, thick and curled up together in a downwards pattern ending in yet more unfitting shoes. This time black leather, shiny dress shoes with a white ankle sock. Deciding it best to look up again and to tell the guy to back off she did so but couldn't bring herself to look friendly or polite and could only show her discomfort with his close proximity with a grimace.

'Beautiful lady' the blonde addressed, whilst picking up Nami's right hand, which had been resting on her lap. She followed the movement with her eyes.

'I couldn't help but notice you watching me across the bar. What an honour it is to catch the eye of someone as beautiful as yourself'. The blonde then brought the hand to his lips and lightly kissed the back of her fingers.

'My name is Sanji, my dear. May I enquire what yours is?' Sanji quirked his only visible brow, looked Nami in the eye and finally took a step back to straighten up, a sly gin on his face but still holding Nami's hand.

Dumbfounded. That was what Nami was. Not that she hadn't been approached before by guys, this one was certainly straightforward and confident of himself. If only he knew that she was actually trying to avoid his gaze as the only thing catching her eye was his hideous outfit. Pulling herself together after a short pause as she realised that she was gaping slightly at this Sanji fellow. His character was obviously just on the eccentric side. She managed to put on a rather shy smile and looking towards her knees whilst getting her hand back. She didn't really want this guy touching her but then she also didn't want to seem rude. Acting shy usually worked and she'd see what it got her, if this guy wanted to buy her lunch that was fine.

'My name is Nami, Sanji.' She looked away from his eye, only one was visible after all, pulling out the shy act.

'It's a pleasure to meet you.' She gave her head a small nod then tucked both hands between her knees so he couldn't grab them again.

The last thing Nami expected to happen was for the guy to literally start spinning around on one foot, clasping his hands together next to his cheek and doing some weird wiggle with his hips. At the same time cooing out something incomprehensible, suspiciously sounding a bit like her name, rather loudly. But that is exactly what the guy was doing and it was really quite embarrassing because people were starting to look over. Nami was slightly at a loss at what to do.

Nami pleadingly looked across to the blondes green haired companion, mouth slightly agape and momentarily lost for words. The green haired guy seemed to have been watching the whole scene, bottle in mouth with a bored expression on his face. This obviously wasn't a new development to him.

'Excuse me, but what is he doing?' Nami asked him politely.

The green haired guyed slowly turned to face her then looked her in the eye. That's when she noticed his left eye was closed with a rather nasty scar going down it covering the entire socket. It made her insides squirm a bit at the sight of it. He lowered the bottle from his lips, raised an eyebrow then stated:

'Being a complete and utter dumb arse. What does it look like?'

Nami could only nod to the deep baritone response as if in understanding. However, the response also made the blonde stop what he was doing then square up to the green haired guy. By this point practically the whole of the cafes patrons were looking in their direction. Some with sandwiches or cups of tea paused halfway to their lips as a thick layer of tension seemed to erupt around the pair. Nami instinctively leaned away.

'What was that, you stupid marimo bastard?' Sanji said with a snarl.

The green haired guy frowned but otherwise acted as if he were the master of nonchalance by taking another swig from his bottle of rum.

'Sit your dumb arse down, shit cook. Stop making a scene.'

Sanji growled low in his throat but turned his head slightly to look into the café only to observe that he had indeed gained quite an audience. Scrunching his face in annoyance at the situation, Sanji returned to his seat grumbling about 'shitty, fucking swordsmen' under his breath. Once seated and turned towards the back wall again the green haired guy looked around the café the raised his bottle as if in toast then swivelled in his chair so he too was faced towards the back wall, signalling that the show was now over.

Murmurs and chatter started once more around the patrons and Nami could only sigh with relief. Luckily Kokoro was coming over with her order, her usual lazy smile in place as if nothing had happened. Placing the sandwich down in front of Nami, laughing lightly.

'My, my, Nami. You're as popular as ever.'

'Yes. To all of the weird and wonderful that Grand Line has to offer it would seem.'

'I'd say you were quite lucky, my dear.' Kokoro settled on a stool once more and a glass of wine instantly appeared in her right hand.

'Why do you say that?' Nami enquired.

'Well well, you always have such handsome men chasing after you.' Kokoro laughed, 'I would take advantage of them myself if I were in the same situation.'

Nami couldn't help a coy smirk appear on her face after such a statement.

'Now Kokoro, where did you get the impression that I didn't use such things to my advantage?' Then her face dropped slightly. 'But, invading my personal space, idiocy or bad personal odour I draw the line at. Sometimes it's just not worth it.'

Nami took a bite of her lunch finally, sighing in content just as someone started screaming near the entrance drawing everyone's attention to the word 'GUN!'

Nami groaned, rolling her eyes, 'you have got to be kidding me' she thought, while she to turned her attention to the café entrance.

Among the startled and clearly scared and shaken customers gathered or sat near the entrance, loomed a middle aged man in a metal plated suit, which a cape was hanging from, cropped greying hair and fluffy jaw long sideburns. Droopy bloodshot eyes staring down the cafes customers and mouth in a permanent frown. This man looked like a gorilla with a heavy top build and skinny legs, said gorilla man started to talk.

'I am hungry, so give me some food now!' he directed at a young woman, who was clearly shaking behind a counter displaying deserts. While the woman rigidly got a paper bag and scooped up whatever cake was nearest the gorilla man continued.

'Now I can not pay for this food so it'd be real good if you all could help a guy out by giving me your wallets'. He then glared at the entire café and then as if to emphasise his point took out 2 dual pistols, which were hanging from his belt loops and partially hidden by the cape to then point them outwards on either side of him towards the cafes patrons.

This created a vortex of panic throughout the café, some just stared on wide eyed frozen, whilst others started screaming and crying.

Nami looked on with rising anger; there was no way that this bastard gorilla man was getting her money. No way in hell. She started to look around her for possible ways out of this situation, meanwhile gorilla man was directing the café patrons to put their wallets in an over the shoulder record bag, which was previously also hidden behind his cape. Shit, she didn't have much time. Glancing around she noticed Kokoro gripping an empty bottle of wine, arm strained and jaw set, she was obviously contemplating whether she should throw it at the man.

Looking for a possible weapon of her own, all she could come up with were her knife and fork or her metal nail file in her handbag. This was not good. Looking around a little more frantic now as gorilla man was coming close to Mr hideous outfit and Mr hot pants to her left, anxiousness was creeping up her spine and up her throat and she started to panic. Breathing a little quicker to cope with the adrenalin pumping through her veins, gorilla man approached the blonde guy Sanji. She peered over only to notice that both of the guys were still staring forward and didn't make any move to give gorilla man any sign of recognition. She stared on wide eyed, holding her breath as the gorilla started to point one of his pistols towards Sanji's head.

'Excuse me sir' the gorilla almost purred, 'perhaps you could oblige me by handing me your wallet'. It wasn't a question more a demand.

Kokoro decided that that was a good moment to intervene. Nami looked on frantic, what was Kokoro doing? That man had guns! But she walked over to be in front of the blonde and green head, empty bottle still gripped tight.

'No' Kokoro actually demanded and looked absolutely furious; Nami had never seen her look this way.

'Excuse ME sir but I think have more then enough money and food after threatening my staff and customers so by all means, LEAVE'.

Nami couldn't believe Kokoro's guts; she wished she had that kind of confidence to want to stand up to protect others. All she could do though was sit there frozen in fear much like the majority of the other patrons in the café. The gorilla man started to laugh though. A deep menacing rumble that seemed to come from his chest he then proceeded to point his other gun to Kokoro's face. To her credit she didn't even flinch and continued to eye him with pure hatred.

'Don't you know who I am hag?' He chucked out, while giving her a death glare of his own.

'I'm quiet famous around these parts', he paused as if for dramatic effect and actually managed to turn the corners of his lips upwards into a smug smile. Everyone seemed to take in a breath in anticipation for what was going to happen next. The entire café became deathly quiet.

'Why I've quite the career behind me, five armed robberies, I guess this will make it six' he seemed to contemplate. 'Muggings I can not count, I do like to dabble in a few burglaries when I'm in the mood.' He started to chuckle again.

'I'm in all the papers, they call me Don Krieg, think of it this way, I'm about to make your dive of a café famous too.' Then he actually started to grin.

Several gasps were heard when he mentioned his name. This seemed to inflate his ego. Nami to had read about this man in the paper, despite his boasting it seemed he was wanted mostly for violent crimes, he seemed to just like to go out of his way to smash things up, whether it be a park bench, an entire store or for anyone unfortunate enough to get in his way, themselves. This was one sick man and she hoped that Kokoro wouldn't do anything else to put herself in further danger.

It wasn't Kokoro who answered him back though, she just continued to glare. It was the blonde who opened his mouth, it was that Sanji guy.

'Hey Marimo' he turned toward the green head on his right speaking aloud.

'Have you ever heard of someone called Don Krieg?' Krieg's attention returned to the blonde, the frown quickly returning on his face.

'Nope'! The green head deadpanned and took another drink, expression blank as if he couldn't care less.

Everyone was now focussed on the odd looking pair and glancing towards Krieg who was now positively scowling. He took one of the pistols away from pointing at Kokoro and now aimed a pistol at each of them.

Nami felt like her heart was in her throat and that it was beating a mile a minute, to try and calm herself down she reached for her drink to take a sip only her stiff movements made the arm jerk forwards and instead of picking the glass up she sent it flying off the counter to smack on the back wall leaving behind a gloopy orange mess sliding down the wall.

Krieg jerked his head towards her and the smirk returned on his face. He slowly made his way towards Nami, making sure he faced the other guys sat at the counter. Nami for her part froze up completely, one arm still stretch out over the counter top. Krieg aimed one of his pistols on the guys and aimed the other at Nami's temple. Many patrons in the café gasped, looking on in horror.

'Now, I came in here asking nicely for some food and a little money' Krieg started to purr out again.

'I really don't want to be killing anyone but I may have to if I don't get what I asked for.' He then chuckled.

Nami finally managed to get out of the frozen state angered by his words and that's when she noticed a wire running along the edge of the counter directly in front of her leading to a lamp, which was only half a meter to her left. Now to distract this creep to give her enough time to grab it and smash him in the face. Perhaps luck was finally on her side as Sanji abruptly stood up and turned one blue murderous eye on Krieg, the momentum sending his stool screeching to a holt a couple of meters behind him. He then casually put his hands in the front pockets of his shorts and leaned back on his heels. Despite the casual stance, he looked like a wound up coil about the let loose. A strong aura emitting of pure malice seeping from his pours as he gave a loud snort from his once more flaring nostrils.

'You are one stupid shitty arsed bastard' Sanji spoke low and gravely whilst he stared down the man still pointing a gun at him.

Everyone seemed to take in a breath and hold it, wide eyes from all directions focused on the pair standing just below the mermaid statue on the back wall. The green haired guy sighed out heavily, put his bottle down and started reaching for a long duffle bag under his feet that Nami never noticed before.

'You've got some fucking nerve to disrespect so many woman with your selfish shitty demands but pointing a stupid shitty gun at any lady I cannot forgive or allow you to live anymore, you arsebag coward.' Sanji almost spat.

Krieg for his part remained rooted to his spot, one pistol aimed at Sanji, the other still on Nami. The only sign of change was a raised eyebrow at Sanji and a growing grin taking over his face. He would occasionally glance to the green head that now had the duffle bag in his lap and unzipped it in one quick smooth motion.

'Now if you don't take your little toy away from my lady friend there in the next 10 seconds I will shove my foot so far up your arsehole, you'll be shitting Italian leather for the next fucking month.' As if to emphasise his point Sanji started to tap his right foot as if to show that it was getting impatient.

Krieg guffawed loudly to Sanji's statement and proceeded to take the safety catch off his pistols and now aimed them both at Nami. Nami had the decency to be both terrified and give Sanji the stink eye at the same time as if to say 'what the hell are you doing?', which also happened to be going through her head along with 'I'm going to die!'

'Is that so, mister . . . ?' Krieg paused for the blonde to fill in the blank.

'They call me Flame Leg Sanji; it would be unwise of you to take my threat lightly.' Sanji demanded in a haughty manor, his one visible eyebrow creasing in anger.

'Well Mister _Flame_ Leg, I can't say I've ever heard of you and you are becoming quite the annoyance and I'm still rather hungry. That carrot cake in the display case over there is looking rather good. I think I'll get your lady friend here to go get it fo…' Krieg's confident little speech came to an abrupt stop as his prized twin pistols were nothing more then handles held in both hands. The barrels and shaft falling to the floor as if in slow motion, cut off in a clean slice.

This prompted several events to happen in a timely chain reaction. While Krieg's face and frame turned to shock, eyes bulging watching his pistols split in two whilst a sharp breeze was felt across his face and hands. Sanji leaned forward, swinging his right leg around with building momentum to fulfil his promise by planting his foot firmly just under Krieg's' coccyx. The force behind the kick managed to launch Krieg off the ground slightly, whilst he doubled over in pain in Nami's general direction. This caused Nami to screech loudly, grab the nearest thing she could use to defend herself, which happened to be her barely touched beef sandwich and rammed it along with her fist into the disgusting mans face.

Before Krieg knew it he was flat on his back with a katana pointed at his neck. Both the green and blonde men stood over him, their eyes shadowed giving off quite the menacing aura. A piece of beef slid off his cheek leaving behind a trail of gravy, his backside throbbing in pain. That was some kick; his suit was covered in concealed metal plates, which usually kept him protected from any physical damage. Momentarily dumbfounded, Krieg trailed his eyes along the length of the katana at his throat, up the tanned muscular arm and finishing on the piercing dark eyes boring holes into his own from the guy with the head of green hair.

Who were these guys? One slices his pistols like they're made of cheese while the other manages to injure him through his specially adapted suit. There was no way that Krieg was going down that easily though he mused, he'd have to pull out a few extra stops for this job _and_ get that bitch back for throwing her fucking sandwich in his face.

'Well then, I'm quite humiliated' Krieg snarled, glaring still into those dark eyes. His words trying for nonchalance but his tone displayed barely contained anger.

'If he's Flame Leg Sanji, does that mean that you are Grass Fried Sword?' Krieg had the good grace to grin; eyebrow rose curiously and sniggered after his mocking words despite the unmoving blade tip millimetres from his throat.

The green head was not the one to speak; in fact he didn't move an inch, eyes if anything becoming more shadowed and black, his aura dangerous. It was the irritating blonde again who spoke next.

'While I do appreciate a good insult to my marimo haired companion here you should know something'. He said with a lilt to his tone while tapping his left foot this time. A grin overcame Sanji's face and seemed to take it over by a good 50%. With the shadowed eye and overly large grin he was starting to look just as sinister as his friend.

'I am the only one allowed to insult him about his retarded appearance'. With that Sanji's left heel slammed into Krieg's' stomach, effectively knocking the wind completely out of him.

The green head withdrew his katana slightly and glared at the blonde.

'Shut up! Pervert cook! You're usual verbal garbage is not needed at the moment!' the green head half shouted half growled. His eyes went back towards the man still splayed out on the floor.

'You' he addressed Krieg, 'it's about time you got the fuck out of here so we can get back to our lunch. If you want an introduction so badly, my name is Zoro, Roronoa Zoro and I'd very much like to get back to my rum, which you very fucking rudely interrupted me from'.

Sanji rolled his eyes but agreed and added a 'tut' and 'such a selfish shitty bastard' shaking his head at Krieg wheezing on the floor trying to take in more breath. This was the only sound in the entire café.

Nami had to re-evaluate the two guys she had somehow managed to get associated with. They were undoubtedly capable of taking care of themselves but were also clearly trouble. She couldn't completely disregard that they had helped get rid of the creepy guy on the floor. She was also interested to hear the name Roronoa Zoro. She had heard it somewhere before, maybe on the news but she couldn't really place it or remember the reason why. Looking over Zoro, his body language was all control but there was something sinister about it as well. Despite the dodgy wardrobe she doubted few would have the guts to snigger at this man right now.

She turned her sight to Krieg still on the floor, his breathing had calmed and he was starting to move his right arm slightly. She noticed that he was trying to get something from his trouser pocket. Glancing around she noticed everyone's attention was on the green and blonde pair. She focused back on Krieg; she just had a gut feeling he was up to something. Luckily his attention was also on the two guys who were now arguing amongst each other again. Krieg suddenly jerked his hand, temporarily revealing a red button hidden inside a pocket. Obviously oblivious to the fact that he was being watched closely, he pressed the button in completely then rested his hand by his side.

Nami started to get a bit on edge from his move, then even more so when she noticed a smug smile start to grow on his face. Then she heard it. In the still silence of the café, ignoring the duo's bickering, a low creaking sound was heard, like a door that needed oiling, only so quiet you'd never hear it, unless you were paying attention. Nami's eyes grew as she noticed that the panels on the mans jacket started to move. The metallic plates slowly fanned out upwards making Nami squeak as she was sure she caught a glimpse of more arms hidden amongst the folds.

Before anyone knew it Nami was on her feet and gave a film wallop to the backs of the blonde and greens heads with her fist.

'Will you two idiots shut the hell up already? That freaky guy has weapons in his suit.' She said pointing to Krieg on the floor turning Sanji's and Zoro's attention to him once again as they rubbed the spots where they had just been hit.

The desired effect was not as Nami intended however.

'Wow, that's one freaky suit' Sanji stated whiles leaning over Krieg to inspect it better.

Zoro meanwhile turned instead upon his female attacker with an irritated look on his face.

'Hey woman, what the hell exactly did I do to you to warrant a fist is the back of my head?'

'Why are you having a go at me when you should be dealing with the psycho on the floor?' Nami countered in exasperation looking cross.

'Oi! Shitty marimo! You do not talk to a woman like that!' Sanji joined in getting into Zoro's personal space and also ignoring Krieg on the floor. Whose jacket was starting to reveal several automatic weapons across a chest plate and hidden pockets.

'I'm terribly sorry Miss beautiful Nami; this brute here has no manners. I for one certainly appreciated your fist of love.' Sanji gushed and started wiggling again.

'Fist of love?' Zoro questioned getting even more annoyed with a clipped tone.

'And here I was with the impression that you couldn't get even more retarded then usual, you god damn idiotic curly bastard.' Zoro glared.

'What the fuck seaweed head? Don't throw such words like _retarded_ at me when you have a lower IQ then your nearest relative. A Plant.' Sanji spat back, an inch away from Zoro now.

Nami at this point made a grunt of complete annoyance and started looking around for anything she could throw at these idiots. Her eyes landed on the lamp and the dodgy wiring that went under the bar top. An idea instantly sprung into her mind and with out any further thought she grabbed the lamp, ripping the poorly tacked wire from the bar. Smashed the dome top off on the edge of the counter, swung around and then with both hands and momentum, swung the lamp down aiming for the breast plate on the freak on the floor and smashed the light bulb and rest of the lamp into the metallic suit.

Stepping back she noticed the argument between the idiots had stopped. Looking up she was faced with both of them staring at the floor with mild shock across both of their faces. On the floor was Krieg twitching and spasming in shock as he was being electrocuted from the wiring from the lamp, which had got trapped between two of the metallic plates.

Nami heaved a sigh of relief and went to collect her bag.

'Someone should call the police and an ambulance maybe.' Nami declared glancing at the still shocking Krieg and brought her handbag to rest on her shoulder.

'Lunch is completely ruined thanks to all of you idiots'. She pointed a glare at Sanji and Zoro in particular.

Everyone just gaped at her and her nonplussed attitude. No one moved an inch until in the background the sound of sirens could be heard indicating that the police of someone similar were almost there.

'Shit!' Sanji declared. 'Hey marimo, we got to go. Now!'

Zoro didn't waste time, he went back to the counter and slid his sword back in his bag and grabbed the unfinished bottle of rum and throwing a pile of berries on the counter.

'Sorry for the mess' he directed at Kokoro.

Zoro turned and together with Sanji swiftly made their way towards the exit. All the patrons stared at them as they left. What they didn't expect was a huge protestation to come from the red haired woman who was following them.

'Oi, you can't just leave me here with that guy on the floor, you were the one's to first beat him up anyway.' Nami admonished but underneath she was panicking, she'd just basically done away with someone in her lunch hour. That isn't going to look good even if it was in self defence.

'Yeah but you were the one to finish him, you crazy bitch' Zoro yelled in her face. 'We have places to be so we can't sit around here waiting for the feds to keep us detained for hours.'

'I just saved your lives and everyone else's in this café. That man had hidden weapons on him!' Nami yelled back. 'You are not leaving me here!' She pleaded and yelled.

'Ah, beautiful flower, I would willingly stay here with you any day, any hour under normal circumstances but we really must go.' Sanji crooned.

'Then take me with you!' Nami shouted back and glared at them for good measure.

This made them stop turn and stare at her like she had grown a second head.

'What?' was all that Zoro could say, while Sanji started to do his strange spinning dance thing again cooing Nami's name. Sanji abruptly stopped and grabbed Nami's hands once more.

'I am over the moon Nami-swan that you approve of me so much. I long to be in your company longer, no, forever! But we really must part, alas!' Sanji exclaimed.

Nami getting even angrier by this completely ridiculous man very curtly asked the other; 'where are you going then in such a rush, when not two minutes ago you were ready to lounge around to finish off your damn rum?'

'We don't have time for this' Zoro declared while looking up the street, where the first of a string of police cars were about to arrive. So he grabbed Sanji by his collar and dragged him over to a rusty orange camper van parked just up the road and effectively heaving, by this point, the extremely angry and raging blonde into the passenger seat.

'Fuck you Marimo!' was the exclamation made before the door was slammed shut in Sanji's face and Zoro jogged around to driver's seat.

From there Nami could see a raging row ensue on Sanji's side only, where he had somehow managed to fight Zoro in such a confined space with those deadly legs again, mainly aiming for the green heads face. Zoro, meanwhile, was getting angry constantly trying to bat him off so he could drive away. Nami took this opportunity of their distraction to sneak into the back for their van, for she had no intention for sticking around and Kokoro knew where she worked. As silently as she could she opened the back door, it gave an awful squeak like the damn thing hadn't been oiled in about 10 years. Luck was on Nami's side though because the two idiots were so enraged at one another that it escaped their notice.

On hearing the sirens come so close they were about on top of them, Nami snapped, slammed the van door closed and then moved forward enough to slam a fist into the backs of each of their heads again yelling;

'Will you two shut up and drive! Honestly, I can't believe I am relying on such idiots for my safety'.

Sanji just stared at her startled, Zoro however, glared while rubbing his poor abused skull, which had been hit with quite the painful punch twice within the space of five minutes. He came to his senses at least, turned his eyes to the road and slammed his foot into the accelerator pedal. The van shook like this was the worst abuse it had ever received but eventually got out of the street before the first police car stopped outside Kokoro's cafe.

'I don't know what the hell you think you're doing woman' Zoro exclaimed keeping his eyes on the road.

Sanji however was still staring at her and soon started throwing various comments of affection her way, which vexed both Nami and Zoro simultaneously. The men were still so distracted by the unexpected addition of Nami then to add Sanji's constant verbal drivel on top, that it escaped all the parties notice that an unmarked car had been following them since they set off.


	2. Jungle Jam

It was common knowledge that Usopp the marksman specialist had a superiority of mind. A superiority of wit and a superiority of style, but most of all, he had a superiority of courage. He noted in most people he was acquainted with, a barely suppressed envy of his good fortune and thus placed him in high regard amongst his peers, almost as if he were master. Usopp, however, could boast of the good fortune to have such an easy temperament of character that such compliments paid to him on a daily basis would never inflate an ego, which he dare say does not exist.

'Gahh! What the hell is that?' what could only be described as a high pitched shriek escaped said mans throat as he definitely felt something land on his head. 'Of all the days not to wear a hat' he thought, but plucked up the courage to shake whatever foul creature it was that thought it would be a good idea to think his head was a good place to land. It would be sorry; it will be no more of this world when he was finished with it!

Taking a few seconds to collect his nerves, no, courage that is. He paused in his walk down the moderately busy high street, not noticing that several other people were now giving him a rather large birth or the mothers dragging their children away from such a suspiciously behaving man. He then on the count of three raised his arms, poised for action. 1..2...3! His hands dived onto his head, batting quickly at it as he faced down to the ground. A distressed sounding hum was coming from somewhere close but Usopp couldn't place who it was from, it couldn't be himself. After batting for several seconds he was rewarded by the object floating towards the ground, utterly defeated. There lay a rather sorry looking red and yellow leaf that must have fallen from one of the many silver birch trees that littered the area.

'Hah ah ha ha ha' an uncomfortable and forced laugh came from Usopp as he peered out at a small crowd he had gathered, although thankfully most people were just avoiding him and going on their ways.

'Are you okay sir?' a little old dear who only came up to Usopp's chest in height asked him. 'Leaves do get everywhere at this time of year don't they. Ooh I sometimes get a fright myself!' she exclaimed.

'Yes that's right' Usopp thought, 'leaves are a pest!' consoling himself that his reaction to the situation was perfectly natural or rational for anyone, he eased back into easiness as his confidence restored.

'Oh yes madam,' he replied 'that gave me quite a fright for a second but I soon knew that it was only a leaf so just easily removed it. I felt there was no need to overreact at the situation. I am quite okay, thank you for asking. I do hope you have a pleasant day.' Usopp finished his speech in a slight rush with some more uncomfortable chuckles.

At least most of the small crowd had moved off. Now all that remained was the little old lady who started talking to him and a pretty blonde girl who appeared to be trying very hard not to laugh at him by covering her mouth with her hand. The little old lady was starting to look at him in confusion.

'Well, really ladies I must be on my way. Do have a good day, both of you' with this Usopp walked past them both at a perfectly leisurely pace, no he was not almost jogging, it was fine.

Both of the woman followed him with their eyes until he crossed the street. The old lady, while baffled stated; 'well what a strange young man he was' before turning and going on her way in the opposite direction. The blonde finally laughed out before continuing on herself.

Thankfully for Usopp he had so much manly pride that he never felt foolish for his actions. He was a young man of 22 and of average height. After battling his large weight in the past year or so he now had an impressive physique, not that he liked to show it off very often. He was blessed with the looks from his late mother, long dark eyelashes, thick full lips, a mass of thick curly black hair, which he tied back at the nape of his neck, but what most distinguished him was his nose, which curiously stuck out by about 15cm in length.

It would be fair to say that he was full on jogging now and heading to his last stop off before he headed back to HQ. He'd heard news that Zoro and Sanji would be returning today so he had to get plenty of supplies in preparation of their arrival because everyone knew that chaos would only ensue wherever the pair went. He had purposely left this shop for last because the owner was rather alternative, often making the small hairs on the back of Usopps neck stand on end. The shop wasn't exactly legal but it was hidden in plain sight of central Grand Line by having at its front a very innocent looking cupcake shop.

Seeing the unmistakable facia of bright fuchsia pink settled into the beginning of a number of large three story stone terraces with ground floor shops, Usopp slowed to a walk once more. This was a very reputable and wealthy part of the city. However, even he would have to admit that some mental preparation was needed before he entered this place. Oddly enough the shop became hugely popular and quite famous after the cupcakes were featured in a popular female sitcom on the Marine TV network. It was called S&M in the City, where in Usopps opinion; four women went around terrorising any men that happened to cross their paths. The main character, Sadi-chan, actually posed with the huge hulking owner, Moria, for a news article. She was in a questionable outfit that barely held everything in place of scarlet red PVC holding a box of cupcakes in one hand and a body length black trident in the other. However, since the press release several months' back, which also alerted the world's media because it featured Sadi-chan, detailing the shops exact location, there has always been a humungous queue to get into the place.

This sight always somewhat disturbed Usopp because he knew what the "side" business of Thriller Bark Cupcakes was. He also knew well the shady characters who worked there and quite frankly, everyone that worked there was just plain creepy. Taking a deep breath Usopp strengthened his resolve and rather than joining the back of the queue, which stretched past a whole food shop and fitness centre to its right which were wholly being ignored by the cupcake loving public, Usopp went around the side where a delivery van in a similar bright pink to the shop was parked. There was another entrance into the property from round the back that was not for the majority of the public but it would happily assist their other clientele.

Unlike the front of the building, which had been part destroyed by their eyesore of a shop front, the back celebrated the grey and ochre stone which made the terrace look as rich as the surrounding area. There was a small paved garden which housed a large oak tree and several rose bushes along the neat boarder, the flowers having been cut off in the autumn months. Two carved stone benches lied to the sides creating a walkway to the oak at the rear while the terracotta paving tiles were arranged in a circular pattern leading to an oak and pink tinted glass door. Usopp after taking a gulp, squaring his shoulders and raising his head knocked on the door the required five times.

The door was opened by the shop owners' daughter, which caught Usopp off guard. She normally worked in the cupcake shop.

'Oh, it's you with the nose' she said in overly sweet but clearly disappointed tone.

Perona, the daughter to the Moria's, was known for being blunt; Usopp had seen some tough looking guys reduced to shells of depression after Perona had finished with them. Sometimes you would catch one wandering around outside their shop fluttering about like some kind of half ghost. It was easy enough to guess that those guys had had an encounter with Perona although it could be said any of the Moria's could have such an effect on people. Funnily enough Perona never had that much effect on Usopp himself, he suspected she gave up trying to scare him some time ago because he was far too brave a creature, he was unaffected by her taunts.

Perona remained in the doorway peering at Usopp expectantly with her wide staring eyes and pouting lips. She appeared to be wearing an attempt at some kind of queen costume today, she often dressed up. A rather tall crown with a huge cross in the centre of it was perched on top of a pink pigtailed wig on her doll like head. No one was actually sure what Perona's natural hair colour was, at least no one but her real parents Usopp suspected. She always wore wigs then dyed her eyebrows the same colour. He doubted any queen would dress like her version of the monarchy unless they were drag queens perhaps. She wore patent leather knee high platform boots in red, black and white horizontal striped tights and a red skater miniskirt. She matched this with a waist length scarlet velvet cape with furry white trim over a skin tight white long sleeved top with some kind of black tribal print on the chest. Still whatever she happened to be wearing it was those eyes that stared at you like they were looking straight through you that were the most unnerving thing about her. Those eyes that almost bugged out and Usopp swore never blinked were directed right at him as she stood as a statue blocking his path into the property.

Usopp decided that it was the time to switch on his best charming tactics. He could melt any heart, even if the heart happened to belong to a crazy, bug eyed, cute things enthusiast. Usopp decided to bow low, sweeping his right arm around to finish tucked into his stomach; looking at his feet he made his address.

'Ah, the b-b-b-beautiful P-P-Perona. You look, ehh, l-lovely today'.

Okay, he might be a little bit nervous but definitely not scared.

'Really? How can you tell when you're looking at the floor?' Was Perona's reply. Still she stood where she was unmoving and still staring.

Usopp stood straight 'Well Perona, you always look lovely'. He couldn't quite look her in the eye as he said that. Perona just continued to stare. He changed tactic.

'Well, I'm here for some supplies is there someone here to, ehh, assist me?'

'Hmm, well, Absalom is upstairs; Moria is away on business' Perona informed Usopp but still wasn't stepping aside to let him in. Usopp's heart may have dropped into his gut at the mention of Absalom's name. Perona was the sweetest creature in the world compared to that insane pervert.

'Ah, well, is he available?' It would be fair to say that Usopp couldn't keep the tone of loathing out of his voice. Perona either didn't notice or chose not to notice as she finally stepped aside to let Usopp enter the rear of the property. The entryway was a fairly small space decorated richly in moss green paper, slate flooring and dark mahogany woodwork. Several photos of the Moria "family" covered the walls. They were not blood related, Perona was only Moria's daughter by some kind of title, but all "family" members had joined together by simply congregating to one another, by oddness Usopp guessed, at an old fight club over in Shabody, west Grand Line. Oddly enough this is also where most of the Straw Hats met, a band of misfits headed by Usopp's best friend Luffy.

Usopp knew that the door directly ahead was entrance to the cupcake shop; there were stairs to the left, where Usopp would be heading to get his purchases from the upper floors. There were three other entrances on this level which housed a stock room, kitchen and small toilet.

Usopp's and Perona's attention was suddenly directed towards the shop as a rather loud clatter and a shout of 'Cindry-chan!' bellowed from through the doorway. Within a few seconds a cupcake topped with blue icing rolled into the hallway. Perona sighed then stepped over the cupcake fully ignoring the situation in the shop.

'Oi, come with me, okay?' her overly sweet tone beckoned Usopp away from the ground floor and the sudden head of blonde bob chasing dropped cupcakes on hands and knees. Usopp rather reluctantly started climbing the stairs behind Perona, glancing back at Cindry the blank but sweet and overly accident prone shop assistant the Moria's hired about a year ago.

Up the stairs Perona turned right and stopped outside the first door on the landing. The walls were a cream here and the wood still the dark mahogany that furnished the entire property. Usopp had only been into Absalom's room once before, he normally did business with Moria who usually made him stay in his office. To be honest he didn't particularly want to repeat the experience of Absalom and his room, but here he was once again.

Perona rapped on the door while almost whining that a customer was here. She continued her relentless knocking until a sleepy but annoyed looking Absalom opened the door. Suddenly he glared daggers at Perona when he comprehended that it was her who had woken him. Usopp at least liked to think he had simply been asleep, it may be about midday but he didn't want to think of any other activities he could have been doing.

Absalom seemed to growl at Perona almost slitting his eyes at her. It was odd to look at. Absalom had his face tattooed to look like a panthers, his favourite animal, this "art" extended down his whole body so he pretty much looked like a lion man. Unfortunately for most, Usopp believed, Absalom did not care much for wearing clothes most of the time but oddly would always wear a white turban on his head of shoulder length blonde hair. If Absalom did make the effort to go out, he'd do a complete 180° and be dressed to the nines, suited and booted in a style reminiscent from 1900's Europe and would behave just as foppish. Luckily today Absalom had managed to wear some jogging bottoms, much better than the saggy under pants of their last encounter. He had one hell of a split personality.

'Quit being so damn annoying, you damn annoying woman!' Absalom stated dagger eyed and jaw squared.

Perona coldly stared back and gave her beadiest of beady eye popping stares to him, that Usopp had ever seen. This staring contest seemed to last for what seemed like a rather uncomfortable 5 minutes. In actuality it may have been about 30 seconds but it still set Usopp on edge. He never liked coming here at the best of times, he didn't want to be around to witness "sibling" quarrels.

'You need to get your lazy self up, we have a customer' Perona eventually said.

'Why couldn't you have dealt with it?' Absalom spat back.

'I'm not going to route around in your disgusting sordid room, you deal with it' Perona sweetly deadpanned back.

'My room is not disgusting' Absalom outraged although Usopp mentally begged to differ that statement.

'You only say that because you don't realise how vile you are! I have things to do' and with that Perona promptly walked away and went back down the stairs.

Usopp had been relatively ignored to this point but Absalom continued to growl under his breath as he seethed at Perona's last statement or Perona in general or anything for that matter, Usopp could never be sure with this guy. When he finally laid eyes on Usopp he stopped and instead looked bored and sleepy once more.

'Oh, it's you with the nose' he said in a somewhat flat but clearly disappointed tone.

Usopp resigned himself to never getting any appreciation for his custom from this family. He believed he deserved at least a little respect from his intimidating status amongst hunters.

'Are you after more arms?' Absalom continued.

'Just some a-ammunition and m-maybe some explosives' damn it, why was he stuttering? His pride would not allow him to do so again!

'Riiiiight, well come in then' Absalom replied still clearly bored but opened his door further to allow Usopp entry.

The first thing to hit you when entering this large room is always the pungent smell of incense and body odour. The one window on the back wall might as well be bolted shut for the amount of use it got. It was always covered with heavy rich burgundy fabric, which made the room dark and the atmosphere always seemed a little humid. The main feature of the room was a huge circular bed, which came with various attachments including; chains, leather cuffs, whips, feathers and vibrators to name but a few. The red satin covering was sporting a few disturbing stains of various colours, which made a shiver go down Usopps' spine. The right wall sported a number of glass encased shelves displaying an array of masks and head pieces. The wall also housed three double wardrobes which contained Absalom's many costumes and outfits, another shiver went down Usopps' spine. The walls were papered in expensive linen paper in deep blue with gold leafy patterns. The floor was mostly covered in a deep cream shag pile rug, which again showed a few spots of various stains. The left wall was dedicated to a huge flat screen television, which inappropriately in Usopp's opinion was showing a porn video. A huge collection of x rated material filled three bookshelves towards the back of the room. Usopp wanted to leave as soon as he'd entered.

Absalom followed him in then shut the door. Usopp didn't move much further forward then a few steps; he didn't want to be near the bed nor the masks nor the porn. He only prayed that Absalom wasn't in a "playful" mood.

Absalom moved around Usopp to stand in front of him only to then stare in a bored manor looking him up and down. Just as predicted earlier, the hairs on the back of Usopp's neck started to stand on end. After a few seconds Absalom's bored expression turned into a smirk. Usopp began to sweat and was aware that he was probably grimacing, the background noise of overly exaggerated sex noises from the video were not helping Usopp's otherwise cool demeanour either.

'I'm not going to serve you until you are more appropriately attired' Absalom claimed out of nowhere. Usopp's jaw dropped.

'You look far too scruffy, what do you think you're doing wearing green dungarees and dirty brown boots when you come to this house?'

Reeling slightly at this random put down, without thinking Usopp blurted 'how can you say that when all you're wearing is jogging bottoms and you're tattooed from head to toe?'

Absalom quickly frowned then narrowed his eyes at Usopp and randomly started to pace in front of him. Suddenly his face turned sly and a spark came to his eye. Usopp's heart was starting to beat more frantically as he prepared himself to bolt.

'You are quite correct, where are my manors today?' Absalom said quite airily then stopped to pose side on then dramatically whipped off his bottoms from his hips. It would appear that the trousers had concealed openings down the outside legs and were off completely in seconds from the forward tug he gave the fabric. Usopp stepped back slightly as there was once again an Absalom clad only in slightly saggy leopard print boxer briefs and a white turban. At moments like this Usopp would wonder who he offended in life past or present to deserve such horrible bad luck. Flinging the trousers behind him Absalom then marched over to his shelves of masks and headwear.

'Hmm, a gimp mask would suit you best with a face like that but then they would never go over that nose of yours. Such a shame.' He sighed pondering; Usopp's thread of pride shattered and fell to the floor.

'Ah ha!' Absalom claimed. 'Oh yes, I think this will do you very well, yes, you would become much more appealing'. He then opened the middle cabinet and selected a black rubber mask from the bottom self. The mask was attached to a rubber cap, which would cover the top half of Usopp's head and had small pointy ears which looked like spiral cones.

'Put it on' he manically laughed 'no wait a minute!' Absalom then scampered over his bed towards his back wall picked up a silver tub of something and then hurtled back towards Usopp. His face was a picture of disturbing excitement. Usopp was even closer to bolting at this point, he could go without his special ammunition. It just wasn't worth this terror!

'Here' Absalom guffawed before throwing the small tub at Usopp's eyebrow. This made Absalom howl in laughter again.

'Put it around your eyes' Absalom came uncomfortably close to Usopp then dragged him to a mirror and boxed him in place with a hysterical grin on his face.

Usopp reluctantly opened the small tin to find a stiff black cream inside. It was face paint. Usopp just stared at it without any intention of putting it on his face. Absalom probably sensing this saw fit to then run his arms up the sides of Usopp's legs until they came to rest on his hips and made vulgar grinding motions behind his back.

'I can't wait all day' he whispered in Usopp's ear.

Usopp gulped, his hackles starting to rise. He knew he would be able to leave quicker if he just did what he was told. Miserably a slightly shaking right hand started applying the face paint around the sockets of his eyes.

'Yeessss' Absalom purred still from behind him. When Usopp finished Absalom took it upon himself to start styling Usopp as he saw best. First he removed the hair tie binding back his curls. Once he'd finished his preening, which seemed to include at least five different hair products, Usopp sported a bigger afro then the musical assassin Brook. The mask soon went on afterwards forcing the volume of hair to stick out comically from ear level to the top of his shoulders. The mask not only had the small cone like ears but the rubber had enhanced cheekbones and a cat like "M" shape built in around the eye holes and nose. Usopp was forced to strip to his underwear, Absalom laughing so manically he sounded insane. Well he was insane in Usopp's opinion; he really just wanted to leave. By the time Absalom had finished and saw fit to put on another x-rated film as the other had finished, Usopp could only think that he now looked somewhere between a Mexican wrestler, superhero and a pervert. He was wearing skin tight shiny black leggings, calf length tie up black leather boots, a black and silver studded codpiece and a black and silver edged cropped top. He was miserable.

Absalom sighed dramatically and paused to once over his new creation.

'Puuurrrrfect!' he claimed, 'you should dress this way more often, you will wear this when you do business with us or we will not serve you'. Usopp's jaw hit the floor.

'What?' Usopp shrieked, 'I can't go out looking like this, I look like one of you crazy weirdoes!' Usopp blurted out before he could think about it.

Absalom immediately looked affronted but then his face cracked and he was doubling over in howls of laughter again.

Usopp sighed and clenching his fists stated as if he were nonplussed 'can I get some ammunition now that I'm . . . . . . properly dressed?'

Absalom paused in his laughter although the mirth still shone in his eyes he then gave a dramatic bow and then stated 'yes sir, it will be my pleasure'.

'And what would sir like exactly today?' Absalom then winked at Usopp.

Usopp couldn't help it, he full on cringed from that gesture and had to turn away. Absalom started chuckling again then when a shiver went down Usopp's spine the chuckles turned into howls once more.

'Right, well come on then, I have other things I can be doing so let's get this over with'. Absalom suddenly declared once more in his bored tone. Usopp was positive this guy was either bipolar or schizophrenic, that aside he actually breathed a small sigh of relief that the worst was clearly over now. Absalom walked over to the one porn filled bookshelf on the TV wall and pressed whatever it was that triggered the secret door to the hidden room, which stocked the produce for their side business.

'Come with me' Absalom said almost angrily then glared at Usopp. Usopp followed teeth clenched while repeatedly telling himself that 'it's almost over now'. Usopp made his way following after Absalom then quietly seethed at the fact that his left boot squeaked with every step he took.

Upon entering the concealed room the dramatic difference in appearance always startled Usopp a little. While the majority of the house had no expense spared on its luxurious finishes, this room had every expense going spared. The walls were left to their bare plaster and the room was always chill and murky from the lack of any natural light. All the produce, which consisted of guns, bombs and an array of ammunition, was stored in cheap plastic containers and seemed to be carelessly stacked wherever a bit of space was available. One bare shadeless light lit the room from the centre ceiling, casting numerous shadows across the room. Absalom made his way to the far right corner where a bookshelf with half the back missing sufficed as a serving area with a step ladder leaning against the wall behind it.

Absalom paused behind the broken bookshelf to look back at Usopp. As Usopp weaved between all the boxes in his new black outfit with squeaking boot looking as awkward as a self conscious man can ever look soon had Absalom laughing at him once again.

'You know I'm having a little party tomorrow night, which will be S&M in the City themed. Some of the charaters from the show are coming. You'd fit right in if you wanted to attend?' Absalom grinned at Usopp while wiggling his eyebrows.

'Aarrgghh ummmm NO! No thank you' uttered Usopp timidly.

Absalom laughed again 'well that _is_ a shame, I think you'd be lots of fun' he then licked his lips. Usopp squirmed from the gesture and was starting to overly sweat in his skin tight outfit.

'Well, there you go, I have t-things to do' Usopp cleared his throat. 'Anyway, I'd like 300 exploding stars, 70 beetle busters, 150 flame bombs, 40'.

'Hang on a damn moment!' Absalom said in an annoyed tone. 'Not a light visit then? Just say one thing at a time so I can get what you want, damn it all'.

Usopp listed off all of the items he required; well he liked to buy in bulk to limit his visits to the Moria's to as little as possible. Absalom, who has never been a great fan of doing work which takes him away from his hobbies was getting in a surlier mood with every ordered item. Plastic tubs were getting thrown about in his temper, showing a complete disregard to the high percentage of explosives in the relatively small space. Usopp was now even more desperate to leave.

'My condition of I-don't-want-to-die-because-of-crazy-people-throwing-explosives-about-in-the-room-I'm-standing-in disease is coming on' Usopp chattered out, eyes wide in clear fear.

'What?' Absalom snarled after he'd bagged the last 100 exploding stars and then growled 'do you want anything else?'

'No-no erm yes, I o-ordered some jungle pellets' Usopp said in a slightly higher voice then normal standing stiff as a board.

'Grrr, we got them for you, it was pain in the arse!' Absalom unceremoniously tossed a small plastic container with the other purchases. 'Is that it?'

Words at this point failing Usopp as he stared goggle eyed at his thrown about purchases simply shook his head.

'Thank the lord!' Absalom growled then began to bag up the items in Thriller Bark Cupcakes bags without being particularly careful about it. Once finished Absalom wrote down the order on a tatty A4 work pad totting up the payment total.

'For all the ammunition and bombs plus your outfit from my exclusive wardrobe'

'What?' Usopp shouted in mild outrage.

'From my _exclusive_ wardrobe' Absalom growled angrily 'that comes to §65,500 berries'.

'What the hell?' Usopp shouted indignantly 'Just how much is this ridiculous outfit you've put me in, which I don't even want, cost?'

Absalom was on Usopp in a flash. He was pinching the fabric of the black crop top and drawing Usopp into his personal space so they were mere inches apart. 'Do you have a problem with my taste in dress?'

'N-n-n-n-n-n-n-no-o, no, of course not. I was just a bit surprised that clothes can cost so much but then I only ever get cheap clothes. I don't have any style you see, I just don't know these things. Please forgive me for my ignorance in such matters' Usopp gushed out and ended with uncomfortable high pitched laughing. Absalom just growled low but let go of Usopp however he glared at him continuously.

'So that's §50,000 berries, how are you paying?' Absalom spat.

Usopp didn't question the sudden drop in the amount he had to pay, Usopp wasn't entirely unwise in the knowledge that Absalom wasn't exactly known for his attention span. 'The cash is in my shoulder pouch, which is in your room as you made me take it off'.

'Grrr, fine, take your bags and let's get out of here' Absalom almost shouted, clearly losing his interest in this exchange now. The unfortunate sounds of the x-rated video were the only sounds that could be heard now as Absalom remained silent. Usopp relieved that it was almost over dashed to his discarded clothes and drew out a wad of beri notes from his shoulder bag. He hastily counted out the required amount in front of Absalom, whose attention was more on the screen of his TV.

'Here' Usopp handed the notes to Absalom who took them in a distracted way. Usopp seeing that Absalom's attention was no longer upon himself, took the opportunity to gather his belongings and escape. Once he'd walked in a very casual manor, not at all running, out the door he accidently threw several of his purchases into the hallway in a slightly hasty rush to close the door behind him. He could hear howls of laughter through the door once again and a mocking 'come again soon'.

Slightly indignant over his rash behaviour Usopp once again gathered all of his purchases and clothing and made his way down the stairs where he could see Perona waiting for him with a box of cupcakes. He noticed that he was getting a slightly more beady eyed stare then normal and realised it was likely because he was in his horrible costume "a la Absalom".

'You look nice' Perona stated in a flat monotone.

'What the hell?' Usopp thought. 'Ahh, Perona, would you mind if I used your bathroom to get changed back into my normal clothes again?'

As expected this prompted several seconds of Perona staring at him as if she actually had a 10 second delay at understanding the question asked.

'Yes, I would mind. Besides you actually look much better this way, why would you want to change?' Perona pouted. Usopp mentally sighed.

'These cupcakes are for you.' Perona presented the box to Usopp, who was genuinely taken aback by such a nice gesture from one of the Moria's. Perhaps he was mistaken and they did respect him deep down, he did come across as quite the intimidating man after all.

'Thank you Perona, that's really nice of you' Usopp was genuine in his compliment.

'Its okay' Perona replied, 'those were the cupcakes that Cindry dropped on the floor earlier. I thought Luffy would eat them anyway'. Usopp had to admit mentally that was probably true although the gesture in general sure lost its shine.

'There is one that isn't soiled though, it has green icing, make sure you give it to Zoro and tell him that it's from me, okay?' Perona insisted, her eyes widening more than usual, which Usopp previously assumed was impossible.

Although Usopp couldn't help but be immediately sympathetic towards Zoro for having such a strange creature like Perona obviously pining after him, he also couldn't help but think that Perona's efforts were completely futile. He wasn't even sure if Zoro knew who she was. However, now quite mentally exhausted by another fun filled visit to Thriller Bark Cupcakes, Usopp was well and truly ready to leave.

'Oh, I'll be sure to pass on the message Perona. Thank you again for the cakes but I really must be going.'

'Okay, fine'. Perona deadpanned and stared even more.

Usopp couldn't help but feel awkward when a woman said those dreaded two words to him as surely it meant that it wasn't fine, in fact it was so far from fine he may as well just admit he did wrong for whatever the hell it was that he had done wrong in Perona's eyes. Then again Perona was weird and maybe that was just her way of saying he could go. Deciding he didn't really care anymore and that the latter option was more agreeable to him, he headed for the back door so he could leave and hopefully not have to come back again for several months.

'Well see you later Perona' she just stared; he opened the door, exited, closed it behind him then breathed out the longest sigh he could with one breath. 'Jeez, they just get worse on every visit' Ussop mentally complained.

Not wanting to stay around long so people could see him dressed like he was, Usopp conducted a stealth strategy on how to get to his van with as few people seeing him as possible. He knew he'd have to stay low, keep to small walkways and walk as quietly as possible. He then fully assessed his situation, he was heading out on a main road, he had four large pink shopping bags plus his old clothes, a squeaky left boot and he was wearing an outfit that stuck out like a sore thumb. Usopp sighed; he didn't stand a chance in hell of not being noticed.

Deciding instead to just grin and bare it, he set off down the driveway and out onto the street at something that closely resembled a power walk. One of the women from the cupcake queue decided to scream hysterically and point at Usopp once he had crossed the road obviously mistaking him as someone famous from the random names being thrown his way. That was the final straw, he bolted. He finally started running as quickly as he could to the safety of his van, which he cursed was parked another seven streets away. Running while wearing a codpiece was also incredible awkward and the metal studs in it were not aiding his escape attempts. He had to adapt his run to one where his legs were wide apart, which made his movements much more dramatically jerky. Usopp came to realise when he was halfway there that he was actually screaming and promptly shut his mouth. He noticed that some kids were actually crying at the sight of him while others seemed to just stop whatever they had been doing to stare after him looking disturbed.

Humiliation was carving a deep ravine through Usopp but he put more effort into his waddle run so he could finally get some kind of cover in the safety of his van. Finally coming upon the car park actually brought a tear to Usopp's eye although everyone here seemed to stare in stunned wonder at the sight of him as well. Deciding to just walk with his head held high at last he dumped his purchases in the back of his van but took out a handful of jungle pellets. He quickly scrambled to the pay machine with his parking ticket and had to cover 2:17 hours. Finally getting that paid Usopp was so relieved he actually skipped back to his van with a smile on his face. This definitely got a few more stares but Usopp was beyond humiliation at this point, he got in his van and quickly manoeuvred his way out of there leaving tire tracks on the exit ramp.

Finally able to relax a bit, Usopp was able to comprehend that his feet were absolutely killing him. The damn stupid boots were too slim for his feet and the way he was forced to run probably didn't help matters. 'Gahh, stupid Absalom!' Usopp cursed, he swore every time he went to that damn shop there was always some kind of episode going on. Usopp felt around on the passenger seat where he had tossed his handful of jungle pellets. Usopp's van was about as clean and organised as a bomb site and had a constant smell of mud in the interior, not that Usopp particularly cared. After fishing his hand over several crumbs, a mangy sock, a plastic water pistol, array of various wires and some lego bricks, Usopp finally got hold of one of the small round pellets which felt a bit furry.

After picking it up Usopp became aware that the furry texture was actually lots of tiny feelers. After attaching itself onto one of his fingers Usopp felt the strange suction sensation of the live pellet. These little babies were activated as soon as they came into contact with liquid. They were extremely rare, Usopp was lucky to get hold of 23 of them. He believed he was the only user of them in Grand Line and he was itching to try one out.

After finally escaping the hideous one way road systems around the posh Tenryuubito area of the city, apparently the rich inhabitants didn't like traffic or even getting around easily for that matter, Usopp could stretch out a bit on the main four lane carriageway, which would head to Dawn, home to the Straw Hats HQ, north-west Grand Line.

He'd been driving for about fifteen minutes when he noticed Franky's camper van pull out from a junction just ahead; you would recognise that heap of junk anywhere. What was quite unusual, however, was the speed and chaotic manner at which it was being driven. Franky, a close friend, was the kind of guy who was extremely laid back, he was more likely to cruise then speed, because of this fact Usopp instantly knew that something must be wrong. Upping his own speed a little to keep the van in sight but not to move any closer, it eventually became obvious after observing a white Honda make every single move the same as the camper van, that Franky was being followed.

Moving to the fastest lane Usopp stepped on the accelerator to get roughly alongside the white Honda then managed to get in right behind it on the 3rd fastest lane. Usopp gasped then laughed, maybe luck was finally coming on his side. In front of him, driving with immense concentration on the camper van was one Captain Smoker of the Loguetown police force. It was obviously him for two reasons, one, like his namesake the man smoked cigars _a lot_, the rear window to his car was slightly fogged with the fumes as well as some smoke disappearing through his half open window. Two, even undercover Smoker didn't like to be undercover, either his vanity or pride thought it would be a good idea to give his unmarked car a personalised licence plate of "SMOKR 73" making it obvious for any would-be crook to know that it was Smokers car.

Usopp quickly glanced at the jungle pellet still attached to his finger and grinned. This would be the perfect opportunity to see what that little ball was capable of. Now he had to observe where would be the best place to fire his shot. He needed liquid for this pellet to work. He thought he could shoot it up the exhaust but reasoned that the pellet was likely to burn and become useless. He thought about wetting it with some spit before he launched it but then he'd read that the pellet had an instant extreme reaction to anything wet. After moving closer to spy into Smokers car and trying to think what the best way to get this to work was he spied an opened can of drink in a holder behind the gearbox. It would be a tricky shot and the can could well be empty, he was also reluctant to waste one of his new babies on what could be a lost cause. However, he was struggling to find an alternative.

Realising that his usual shot sling was still in the pocket of his discarded dungarees, which were secured in the rear of his van, Usopp cursed again. He would have to use his old wooden slingshot that hopefully was still in his glove compartment. He wouldn't get the same amount of accuracy with this shot but he wasn't known as the marksman specialist for nothing. Trying to shuffle forward in his seat slightly, this was difficult with the seatbelt restriction as well as having to focus on the road and Smoker. He steadily reached across to the glove compartment trying not to focus his attention on it too much. After feeling around for the catch and two failed attempts at opening it, he finally managed to yank the thing open but this caused him to swerve a little out of the lane. Quickly correcting himself, Usopp started to sweat, out of the corner of his eye he looked to see if his old slingshot was there. He could see an edge of the handle on the far side of the compartment.

'Shit, shit, shit shit' Usopp said on a mantra, he couldn't reach it from where he was behind the wheel.

There was only one way of getting that sling shot and that was to grab at it as quickly as possible. Luckily the stretch of road they were on was going in more or less a straight line. Usopp carefully wiggled out of the upper body part of the seatbelt, consciously set his speed and gave his steering wheel the lightest touch. He tried to shuffle as far as the seat belt allowed towards the glove compartment. Once he was confident he could let go of the wheel Usopp did so gently and then breathed out a long breath he hadn't realised he'd been keeping. The van continued on its way easily; Usopp deciding on the right moment shifted all of his focus onto the slingshot then dived for it. Messily grabbing the handle, Usopp shot back up into his driving position. Amazingly his van hadn't shifted off track at all, Usopp whooped in victory at this small feat.

Getting excited now, Usopp prepared to pull out into the fast lane and lowered his passenger window. Waiting for a good sized gap in traffic on the fast lane, Usopp pulled out, he knew he would only have a small opportunity to make this shot. Having to throw caution to the wind, he let go of the steering wheel once again and stepped into the accelerator a little more. Scooping the pellet off of his finger into the sling of the slingshot, Usopp trying to be as steady as possible in the circumstances aimed up his shot in seconds and let go. After watching the pellet sail through his open window and into Smokers, Usopp made to grab the wheel once more. In his haste he swerved rather dangerously but managed to correct himself quickly, however, now he had gained Smokers attention who was looking at him in disgust while cursing at him to 'watch where he was fucking going' and smoking 3 cigars.

Usopp stepped on the gas to catch up with Franky, his pellet didn't seem to be working which meant he missed his target but he couldn't risk another shot, he'd best warn Franky that he was being followed instead. Pulling alongside the camper van and trying to remain steady, Usopp soon realised that it wasn't Franky being followed but Zoro and Sanji and some mystery red haired woman. That would probably explain the bad driving then. Trying to gesture to them frantically by waving his arms but with no success because as per usual they were clearly arguing amongst themselves. Usopp grabbed the first thing that his hand landed on, which happened to be a clump of some randomly assembled Lego bricks and shot that at Zoro's window. Finally Zoro looked across annoyed and then confused. He wound down his window and shouted.

'Usopp, what the fuck are you wearing?'

Ignoring the question as it was not the time nor the place, Usopp squealed 'you're being followed by Smoker' then gestured with his hands frantically for them to move faster shouted 'go,go,go,go,go!'

Zoro frowned but accelerated and moved into the fast lane after Usopp's van. This seemed to prompt their before unknown pursuer to pull out as well and hit the siren to mark him as a police car.

Smoker was annoyed at himself, he finally realised who that weirdo was in the van, and it was another one of those Straw Hat bastards. How he didn't get it from that ridiculous long nose was beyond him but the mask threw him. There were far too many freaks in Grand Line these days he just turns a blind eye to kooky dressers, it could be a professor for all he knew. But he definitely clicked who it was when the blue transit started travelling alongside the annoying duo in the camper van, it was that wimp Usopp. He thought that he even shot something into his car, Smoker chewed on his cigars in agitation; he needed a vacation because he was losing his edge a little or his marbles, he was positive. The game was on now though, those Straw Hat troublemakers knew he was on their tail and he knew he would get them.

The little jungle pellet was currently feeling its way across a cold object; it was aware of a source of moisture nearby and was trying to reach it. After being shot through the open car window, it hit edge of the wing mirror and ricochets off to land in a dip in the gearbox. The tiny feelers were curling around the lip of the cold object, it could sense liquid. The feelers started to move quicker into to liquid source and within a few seconds the whole pellet was sticking to the top inner can. After a sudden jerk in movement the pellet lost its grip and fell to the bottom of the can with a light plunk into a quarter fill of cola.

The pellet instantly split and the little feelers started growing and expanding at a rapid rate. The can soon burst apart startling Smoker. Roots started to crawl out thick and fast in seconds.

'Shit!' Smoker cursed, 'that bloody sharpshooter did shoot something!'

The white Honda was suddenly weaving between the lanes Zoro and Sanji observed. Looking in the wing mirror Zoro could see that Smoker was looking to his side in panic. Then he was trying to throw some green thing out of his window and failing. Suddenly, what looked like a green tentacle was creeping out of Smoker's window and attaching itself to the car roof, it was growing at an alarming rate.

'Whoa, looks like Usopp has been shopping for more freaky shit' Sanji claimed.

'What the hell is happening?' Nami screeched right in Zoro's ear. He cringed away from her.

'God damn it woman, do you mind your screaming?' Zoro sighed 'it looks like one of our crew will be getting the police off our backs any second now'.

Nami moved a little closer to Sanji, much to his delight, to look out the wing mirror in fascination. 'I've never seen anything like that before.'

Smoker was getting more and more panicked, whatever this thing was it was attaching itself to his right arm, where he had been trying to throw it out of his window. Sticky tentacles were wrapping up his arm and started creeping across his chest and up his neck. The growth was happening too quickly for him to be able to react in time. Before he knew it there were root like tentacles all throughout his car and threaded across his bulky frame. Smoker could hardly physically move any more, he was frantically trying to move his foot off of the accelerator pedal but the roots were making it impossible. His windscreen was almost completely covered and a small tentacle was starting to creep up his left nostril. A deep set fear started coursing adrenalin through his body. The tentacles were starting to slow down their rapid growth but were beginning to pulsate. Smoker could actually feel the liquid rushing through the plant like roots which were attached to his bare flesh; the feeling was making him squirm, it was almost sickening. He didn't know a way out of this, he was still driving at a good speed and he couldn't move the steering wheel nor see where he was going anymore. It was only a matter of time until he crashed, at least his siren was still wailing so people were warned of his approach.

Usopp was staring in mild shock at the developments of the white Honda. The car was now almost completely covered in plant like roots and they had spread just as quickly as he had read about. He did have to wonder why the pellet didn't work straight away though. Smoker was starting to stray off lane but most people were moving far away from his car. Some cars had stopped all together further back. Usopp could no longer see into the vehicle at all as thick roots completely covered the windows inside and out, he was amazed the car was still moving. Usopp cut down his speed to watch what his new little weapon was fully capable of.

A sound similar to boiling water was surrounding Smoker as he sat unmoving in the driver's seat, he didn't know what was going to happen with this damn plant thing but he knew it couldn't be good. There were suddenly lots of popping noises; Smoker could feel the little tremors as air started escaping the roots from lots of little air holes. The smell it produced was like rotten eggs making Smoker gag and his eyes stream. He started scrunching his eyes shut and gritted his teeth around the still lit cigars; he was starting to feel sick. He could hear his own heart thundering in his ears, Smoker was not a man to scare easily but the feeling of being trapped and the unknown were a terrifying combination. While trying to take deep breaths to focus himself he felt something tickling his right cheek, opening his eyes he took in that the roots had now started sprouting leaves.

The car gave a sudden jerk, like it was going over a speed bump. Smoker had absolutely no idea where his car could have strayed to. The car gave another jerk but from the rear of the car only. Smoker was starting to sit at an angle as something was now propping up the right side of his car. He could hear his engine and siren still going although he had somehow managed to stop moving forward. He actually sighed a bit relieved that he was no longer driving forward blind. The relief was short lived after the car jerked several more times but in an upward direction. The leaves were growing huge and fast limiting smokers vision of what was happening to a couple of inches in front of him. He was officially trapped in a giant plant; he hated those damn Straw Hats with a passion.

The main carriageway across Grand Line was a mess. You'd think that a major crash had happened from the array of scattered cars that had come to a halt around a strange plant between the slow lane and hard shoulder of the north bound road. Some drivers were still trying to pass the scene but the only completely free lane was now the fastest. What would soon become a huge traffic jam was already starting to stretch back.

Zoro had come to a halt just ahead of the scene, even he stared slightly open mouthed at the sight of Smoker suspended in twisted thick plant shoots. Nami was staring out of one of the side windows of the camper van. That plant just kept on growing, the car was caught up about two meters from the ground now and thick leaves were twisting out like spades while root like legs crawled over one another spreading further and further out creating a steady base. The speed of its growth was slowing to a steady creep; she suspected that the plant had done its worst. She soon gasped when large buds appeared and instantly started to flower huge purple and blue petals. The sight was oddly beautiful.

'You can't deny that Usopp is one creative son of a bitch' Sanji said into the unusually silent van.

Usopp stopped a little ahead of the camper van in the slow lane and stepped out of his vehicle. He jogged over to the camper and Zoro's window.

'Hey guys, pretty cool stuff huh' He stated proudly while his eyes shone in excitement through the strange rubber mask.

Zoro stared at him with a straight face. 'Usopp, what the fuck are you wearing?'

Usopp's face fell a little, truth be told he'd actually forgotten that he was dressed like an idiot and even more mortified that his attire was considered more disturbing then the situation concerning Smoker. He merely explained himself by stating 'I met Absalom today'. Zoro and Sanji nodded in understanding, Nami kept quiet, she was worried that she was now horribly mixed up but a bunch of nut jobs with an atrocious taste in fashion. Her fear began to creep up her chest again and she crouched behind Zoro's seat.

'What do you think to my new ammunition?' Usopp asked again in excitement 'Oh, and who is that girl?' he pointed towards the cowering Nami.

Zoro replied with 'disturbing' while Sanji simultaneously stated 'never you mind!'

'Sheesh guys, it sure is good to see you again' Usopp said sarcastically. 'Anyway, my ammunition is a total success' he continued happily 'Usopp marksman extraordinaire strikes again' with this he struck a pose. 'Hey, why are you in Franky's van and why are you wearing weird clothes?' Usopp continued while sticking his long nose through the window.

'Marimo, drive off this is becoming unbearable' Sanji deadpanned.

Usopp scowled at them but quickly started grinning again. 'Hey, race you back to HQ! Last one there has to go food shopping for Luffy.'

Both Zoro's and Sanji's face dropped at such a prospect and Nami had no idea how food shopping could be held as a threatening wager. Sanji, however soon smirked 'you're on Usopp-man, prepare yourself for the longest shopping list the world has ever seen.'

Zoro smirked and Usopp laughed, Nami was disturbed.

'Thanks for taking out Smoker Usopp, see you back at base' Zoro said before turning the ignition back on and driving back off into the steady stream of traffic.

Usopp smiled and looked back over to the work his little jungle pellet had performed. He could hear Smoker constantly cursing from somewhere inside the car while some terrified looking good Samaritans were trying to find some way to help him. Feeling that his work was done here, he jogged back to his van, he now had a race to win!


	3. Confusion and Confrontation

The Straw Hat HQ was situated in the area of Dawn, Grand Line which was located in Zone 3 of the city map. It was a fairly quiet area of the city with more family housing then large shops and tourist attractions although there were parts of industry in the area and large parks. The head quarters were rather sleek but inconspicuous from the outside. A series of office spaces and accommodation above Makino's Bar in a converted brick warehouse overlooking Island River. The area was becoming much more cosmopolitan and favoured by artistic types after the council had spent considerable money in regeneration after the main cotton industry collapsed a couple of decades ago.

Makino, who now owned the building, had adopted Luffy when he was only a boy with his older half brother, Ace. She rented some of the upper floors out to Luffy and his business of personal hunters at a discounted rate. It was a dangerous business he'd taken on but after Ace was killed in an arson incident three years ago in suspicious circumstances that the authorities never fully explained to them, Luffy decided he would seek out the real answers for himself. Although Ace's circumstances have never fully been explained to date, the private investigation unearthed other hidden activities that the government dealt in that they would rather the public did not know about. Luffy with his team of close friends, known as hunters, made it their mission to anonymously publish their finds though social media, occasionally public statements like fly posters or working behind the scenes to organise protests.

Unsurprisingly Luffy's activities made him and his team incredibly unpopular with Grand Line's politicians and authority chiefs. For this reason the team had various aliases as a form of protection. When they were publishing their work they would do so under the anonymous guise of ONE PIECE, Our News Exclusively Published In Exact Correctness for Everyone. When doing their hunting for information, they collectively became known as the Straw Hat crew. This alias was how most acquaintances knew them and came about from Luffy, who was ranked as their leader, would never be seen without the hat upon his person. The straw hat was one of the only possessions Ace had kept from their real life father, now it was one of Luffy's treasures.

ONE PIECE had now been running for three years upsetting many people who couldn't do much about them because of the laws granted to a right for free speech. Those who had things to hide from public attention started organising protection in the form of hiring "crews", a relatively new term for a small groups of individuals with specialist abilities. The crews were hired to act as protectors of information for a generous price. As a result an underground network of crews, who could consist of highly trained fighters to cyber attack specialists or just those who wanted to rebel against the system, started developing. Loyalty was questionable and many a dishonest man could be bribed easily making them a rather desperate investment. Luffy's actions with ONE PIECE had provided a constant thorn in the police and military's side, pressure was put on them to uncover who they were and some were encouraged to quietly get them out of the picture by political leaders, thinking this would encourage all the crews to stop and disband. Unfortunately for them, ONE PIECE had the majority of the cities support, gaining them some powerful allies in the past three years, which made the job of outing them virtually impossible. Little did they know that the pesky crew Straw Hat, who were annoying at most, ranking in the very bottom of their important job list, were the very same people that occupied the top spot.

A camper van pulled up in the underground parking lot of the converted factory next to Usopp's dirty transit van.

'God damn it Marimo, it's a miracle we made it here at all with your shitty sense of direction' Sanji grumbled while he stepped out of the passenger door and lightly kicked the side of the van in frustration. If he got a dent in the crappy thing Franky would skin him.

'You see a sign post for Dawn pointing left, do you turn left? Why, hell no! In Marimo world that means you turn right and head towards Arlong Park' Sanji continues while accentuating his points by pointing his lit within seconds' cigarette in Zoro's direction.

'You do know that Usopp is going to be completely unbearable that he beat us back here'. Sanji huffed while going to the rear doors to let Nami out.

'Why in the hell of all things logical did you think it was a good idea for you to drive?' Sanji asked while holding out a hand for Nami to take.

Zoro while rolling his eyes stepped out of the van after carefully collecting his sword bag and shut the door with a little more force then he meant to. He didn't want Franky to bitch at him about potential damage to his "baby" he seriously had enough whining to contend with from the unfortunate draw of being constantly partnered with Sanji.

Zoro sighed dramatically from hearing that Sanji was still prattling on and on at him.

'Shut your damn constant bitching up shit cook!' Zoro eventually replied. 'Perhaps if I didn't have to listen to you always screeching in my ear I'd be able to concentrate better'.

'Pfft, yeah right idiot. You just keep telling yourself that' Sanji guffawed. 'You'd end up driving to the bloody North Pole if it wasn't for me'.

'If it wasn't for _you'_, Zoro accentuated, 'we wouldn't have ended up getting in a fight in that cafe or followed by Smoker on the way back here or ended up picking up a stray.' To this Zoro gestured at Nami, who had just climbed out of the back of the van without taking Sanji's offered hand. She remained silent to the arguing pair and felt at a genuine loss at what exactly she should do now.

'Don't refer to Nami as a stray you ape!' Sanji barked back, 'all that stuff wasn't completely my fault'.

'Yes it was shit cook, because you never bloody know when the hell to shut up!' Zoro said in exasperation, while he glared at Sanji with his one eye. This made Zoro look really dangerous in Nami's opinion. She would have to admit that Sanji did moan at Zoro quite a lot from the small amount of time she had witnessed them together, so she wasn't that surprised that Zoro seemed to be permanently annoyed. Zoro seemed to be the quiet and distant type, not to mention opinionated in his attitude towards her so far, while Sanji was clearly much more friendly and protective.

'What was that you dumb arse Marimo?' Sanji protested.

Zoro, who had had enough for one day, for once didn't rise to the bait of a fight that Sanji was clearly trying to provoke and instead walked off across to the elevator. As per usual this prompted many mutterings of 'shitty Marimo' while Sanji huffed and puffed and stomped about because Zoro was ignoring him. Zoro inwardly groaned, he just wanted some sleep and some beers. He got into the elevator on his own after tapping in the security code and pressed for the second floor.

Just the door closing off Sanji's noise was instantly relaxing. Zoro took a deep breath and loosened up his body. Unfortunately the elevator ride to the second floor wasn't particularly long and once the door opened up again a new level of noise started filtering through Zoro's head. The loudest of which, belonged to their beloved leader Luffy who whooped joyously at the sight of him.

'Zoro!' Luffy cheered while flinging his arms up in the air and running towards him with his face lit up in joy.

'Hey Luffy' Zoro smiled fondly at the shorter man. He was the main reason why he still worked at this crazy company filled with annoying weirdoes.

Luffy flung his arms around Zoro's shoulders grinning while Zoro ruffed up Luffy's short mop of shaggy dark hair. Luffy soon jumped onto Zoro's back and insisted he give him a piggy back ride over to the "chill out" area, which was just a corner stuffed with comfortable sofas and a TV. He could see some of the others there as well. Usopp smirking at him looking triumphant, little Chopper a trainee doctor, stomach down on a bean bag with his nose in a book and the sleek and mysterious Robin, an archaeology, history and political specialist who got fired from her last job for exposing the government funded institute for printing propaganda to the public. Zoro walked over and dumped his human load onto one of the brown leather sofas, which ignited an endearing number of giggles, he then turned and seated himself in a matching armchair and sighed out relaxing.

'Hi Zoro' Chopper piped up and waved slightly at the seated swordsman.

'Finally made it here then?' Usopp mocked with a huge grin plastered across his face.

Robin merely inclined her head towards Zoro while she sat perched demurely on the arm of the sofa where he'd dumped Luffy, 'Mr. Swordsman' she said with a sly smile.

'Hey Zoro, where's Sanji?' Luffy asked after he'd stopped laughing 'I'm pretty hungry, I've missed you guys'.

'Yeah, he's more fun to tease then you and where is that girl that was with you?' Usopp piped in.

'A girl?' Chopper questioned looking at Usopp.

'Huh?' was Luffy's intellectual addition but even Robin was looking at him now in mild interest.

Right on cue, Sanji made his entrance into the office, first by cursing Zoro out then saying hi to everyone, making his usual high pitched and overly affectionate "special" hello to Robin because she had the misfortune of being born of the female gender. Zoro closed his eyes and tried in vain to tune them all out.

Nami remained stood rather sheepishly by the elevator door while Sanji went over to a group of people in the corner of a large open plan office. She could see Zoro sat there slumping in an arm chair and that long nosed man from earlier who had changed out of his weird costume. A woman with long sleek dark hair was staring at her with piercing eyes, fully ignoring Sanji's affections. The look made Nami feel uncomfortable so she instead turned her head to look out of one of the many floor to ceiling arched windows.

'Ah, Nami~swaaaan' Sanji hollered in a goofy voice 'please come over and meet everyone'.

Nami quietly made her way over to the group who all, bar Zoro, were watching her every move. Just as she was about two thirds of the way towards them the guy wearing blue shorts, red vest, straw hat hanging by string from his neck and flip flops walked out towards her. He was of a slight but muscular build with a burn like scar on his chest and another line under his right eye. He had big bright dark brown eyes and shaggy dark brown hair and the biggest smile across his face while he held out a hand in greeting. Nami took the offered hand and jerked forward slightly off balance from the rigorous hand shake she received.

'Hi, I'm Luffy' said man said cheerfully 'you're Nami right?'

Without waiting for a reply Luffy lead her to the group and started introducing everyone.

'This is Usopp' Usopp said hi, 'he's really good at painting and stuff and fixing things when they're broken'. Usopp raised an eyebrow at such a sparse introduction 'he's also the best shot in Grand Line with a slingshot'. To that Usopp puffed out his chest in immense pride.

'This is Chopper' Chopper smiled and waved bashfully, Nami was instantly charmed by his cuteness, he was clearly still a young lad and had the biggest soft doe eyes and soft sandy brown hair framing a boyish face. 'He makes loads of cool natural remedies and he's training to become a doctor although he's really good with animals too, he's our computer guru here as well'.

'Nice to meet you' Chopper said with a smile and then blushed at being the centre of attention.

'This is Robin' Luffy continued around 'she's really really smart and knows loads of stuff about history and politics'. Robin smiled slightly and nodded her head.

'I guess you've already met Sanji and Zoro' Sanji stood smoking while Zoro sat pretending to sleep. 'These guys are my best hunters. Zoro is competing to become the world's best swordsman as well and Sanji is a cook with loads of medals'.

'I'm CHEF not a COOK you moron, and I have Michelin stars not medals' Sanji said in agitation.

'Oh right' Luffy said like he didn't really get it or care. 'His food is the best anyway!' Luffy declared with a grin. 'Hey Sanji you can cook a feast now that you're back, hooray!'

'Believe it or not, it is not my mission in life just to fill your bottomless pit of a stomach!' Sanji said whilst jabbing Luffy in the gut with a finger.

'It isn't?' Luffy asked as a genuine question.

'Hey Luffy, Sanji kindly offered to do all the food shopping this month and said he'd get you whatever you wanted, so you should make up a good shopping list for him' Usopp butted in.

'What? Really?' Luffy asked with wide excited eyes and a bit of drool already starting to creep from his mouth. 'Wow Sanji, you're the best!'

Luffy then jumped on Sanji and wrapped him in a tight bear hug laughing the whole time. Sanji started simultaneously cursing out Usopp for changing the rules to the bet and Luffy for squeezing too tight and wishing he'd get the hell off of him. Chopper and Robin merely looked on whilst Usopp was laughing at the angry blonde, Zoro actually opened his good eye to glare at the spectacle before him. Nami stood there wondering what the hell was going on and awkward at the fact that she was still with these people.

'Erm, so what do you all do here?' Nami asked outright

This turned everyone's attention back to her. Sanji managed to get a knee up between himself and the clinging Luffy and projected him off of himself and a good few meters across the room after Nami's distraction. Now free he once more went to Nami and took her hands in his for the second time that day.

'Beautiful Nami, come and have a seat. Can I get you any refreshments? Some tea or some fresh juices perhaps?'

'Erm, sure I'll have some apple juice' Nami said waving Sanji away as she sat in a blue fabric three seater settee opposite the rest of the team. Sanji then spun across to Robin to ask the same question.

'I'll have a black coffee please Sanji' she said in a soft deep but feminine voice.

'I'd like some apple juice' Usopp asked 'Hmm, me to' Chopped added with wide shiny eyes.

'I'm not here to serve you pigs!' Sanji snarled at Usopp and Chopper. Nami raised an eyebrow to this; Sanji was clearly chivalry obsessed and had his mind set on woman only. All of the men including the shot down Usopp and Chopper didn't seem to flinch or question his attitude towards them or even look at him when he started wiggling and spinning off across the room. Nami could only guess that it was a normal occurrence. Zoro soon stood up and stretched 'I'm getting some beers' was all he said before he followed after Sanji at a slumped walk.

'Perhaps it would be best if we started with you telling us about yourself and how you came to be with Mr. Swordsman and Mr. Cook' Robin's silky voice drifted across the area.

'Yeah' Luffy exclaimed excitedly and then came to sit in front of Nami on the floor with crossed legs. Chopper was looking at her in curiosity from his position on his bean bag. Usopp sat back on the brown leather sofa that Robin was still perched on, looking at her expectantly.

'Erm, well' Nami cleared her throat when a shout of 'get the hell out of my kitchen you slob' echoed across the office. Nami looked over in the direction the shout came from only to see a tired looking Zoro walking back towards the group with an entire box of beers balanced on his shoulder. He slumped back into the armchair he had previously occupied and promptly opened his first beer by removing the cap using his teeth then swigging half the bottle in one huge gulp. Nami was slightly disgusted; again the others had no reaction but she was starting to think that Zoro must be an alcoholic.

'Well' she tried again 'I was just at work, I work at Galley-La Architects'.

'Ooh, Iceberg's place!' Luffy jumped in 'cool' then laughed at his wording.

'Ehh, yeah, how do _you_ know him?' Nami realised how she asked that question may be a little rude but she didn't understand how this skater looking guy, who she thought could be no older then about 20, knew a 37 year old big earner. Galley-La is a global company that has businesses in engineering, construction and architecture covering sectors like buildings, rail and aircraft. Iceberg was the CEO of the architecture division, whose head quarters were the Grand Line branch, where she was working only this morning.

'Oh, he's one of our sponsors' Luffy explained 'he's related to Franky as well'.

Nami had no idea who this Franky person was but she had heard several mentions of him now that she was quite curious. Robin noticing that Nami was starting to look at Luffy as if he had two heads prompted her to get back to her story before Luffy just blurted out who exactly they were to a complete stranger.

'So you're an architect, Ms. Nami?' Robin questioned.

'Ah, no, I just do admin. It was the best paid job I could get after leaving university. I specialised in geography and communications, I did a lot of map planning, which I really enjoyed although some would say I excel at finances as well from all the budgeting we had to do for our exhibitions.' Nami explained, she felt like she was having a job interview with this other woman so she tried hard to make sure she came across well.

'You're good with money?' Luffy questioned.

'Oh, yeah I love money' Nami replied in a slightly dream like state while her eyes sparked at the thought of having lots of money to use however she pleased.

'Hmm, you should come and work for us!' Luffy said excitedly.

To this Zoro groaned and pinched the bridge of his nose, Usopp gave a sideways glance to Luffy looking at him as if he was crazy. Chopper looked excited and Robin had a slight frown to her face. Sanji who heard this as he was walking back across the room carrying a tray stacked with drinks and snacks cooed 'ooh what a wonderful idea!' Nami was taken aback.

'Luffy, perhaps it would be best to wait on such an offer before we know a little more about Ms. Nami' Robin advised.

'No, I trust her. She'd be just what we need' Luffy decided then stood up and presented his hand again to Nami to shake. 'Come and join the team'.

Everyone sighed to this decision except Sanji who was dishing out drinks to everyone including Usopp and Chopper. They all knew that once Luffy made a decision it was impossible to change his mind.

'Well, that's very nice of you but what on earth do you want me to do and what the hell do you do?' Nami asked confused and annoyed at how the situation was unfolding. Sanji came and sat next to her while handing over a glass of juice, he was doing the weird snorting thing with his nose again as he smiled at her. He really made Nami feel uncomfortable when he got too close. Luffy after actually looking at Sanji for the first time since he arrived rather than answering Nami's question instead asked.

'Hey Sanji, why are you wearing weird clothes? Usopp was wearing a Superman costume when he arrived as well'.

Usopp and Zoro both face palmed to the spontaneous question. Sanji's face dropped and sat back to look at Luffy like he would really rather avoid the question.

'That horrible outfit wasn't Superman you know Luffy' Usopp tried to explain although truthfully he didn't really know why he bothered. Luffy only filtered about 30% of the information he was told, the other 70% went flying out of his other ear, Usopp was sure.

'It's been a tough few days Luffy, it can wait' Zoro calmly spoke then opened another beer. 'Are you sure you want to hire that girl, she's really violent'. Zoro gestured towards Nami. Luffy turned to look at her after momentarily being distracted with a blank face while Nami started to give Zoro the stink eye.

'I am not violent!' Nami spat but was drowned out by the indignant wale that came from Sanji. 'Nami is a beautiful delicate flower you pig!'

'Really? I could have sworn I saw her electrocute that ugly guy with the guns' Zoro continued finishing off his second beer just before he had to block a powerful scissor kick from the irate chef with his forearm. Zoro frowned, that would probably bruise.

'What the hell happened to you guys?' Usopp asked.

However, Sanji was intent on preparing to plant a roundhouse kick into Zoro's jaw to permanently shut his mouth up rather than answer Usopp. Zoro, sensing that Sanji was in his usual crappy mood quickly grabbed his swords bag and managed to deflect the blow with the sword hilts still in the bag. Within seconds Zoro was out of his chair and pulling out the first katana he could get his hands on and whipping it out of its hilt. He got several steps away from the sofa area and got into a fighting stance just before Sanji aimed a sweep kick at his legs. Zoro sharply reacted by jumping over the kick and quickly slashed Sanji across the chest with the blunt side of his blade.

Sanji grunted and stumbled back a step. Recovering quickly he launched himself again using several kick boxing moves in quick succession and pummelled into Zoro while grumbling about how Zoro needed to learn some shitty manners. Zoro deflected each kick with an equally quick block against each attacking foot with his blade. Once Sanji landed his feet to prepare for a jump roundhouse kick Zoro quickly changed his stance to a strong defence. Bringing up his blade and the hilt, he crossed them across his chest. He could read Sanji's moves pretty well from the amount of times they ended up coming to blows. Once Sanji had launched and tried to drive his right foot into Zoro's chest, Zoro used the momentum against him and pushed Sanji away using the crossed blade and hilt as propellers, sending Sanji flying into the back of the armchair where Zoro had previously been sat.

Luffy calmly stopped the armchair from sliding across the wood panelled floor towards the TV by halting the movement with an outstretched flip flop clad foot. Chopper quickly rolled off the bean bag on the floor and leapt to the relative safety of the sofa next to Usopp. Nami was quite shocked momentarily by the sudden breakout of a fight but yet again no one else seemed to really react or try to stop it. Once Sanji stood back up and dusted imaginary dirt off of him he ran and launched a double footed dive at Zoro's once again guarded chest. This time it was Zoro who was sent stumbling backwards a number of steps, knocking over then stepping in an office waste bin.

'Fucking damn it!' Zoro exclaimed trying to shake the crappy piece of plastic off of his foot. After it loosened and was consequently launched into a wall at the back of the office, Zoro prepared himself to attack. Sanji was tapping his left foot meaning he was planning an attack from his left side. Zoro swung the blade from where he was stood, several steps away from Sanji, creating a ripple effect through the air. He continued to stir the air building a sharp friction, when satisfied with the pressure created he slashed his blade upwards sending a cutting force across the room towards Sanji. Sanji braced himself against the whipping air, his skin flapping back from the G force, unfortunately his horrible homemade outfit didn't fare quite as well, the slapping wind cuts were ripping the fabric to pieces. The gust even knocked over a potted spider plant shelved on a rear wall.

'Hey Zoro, don't destroy the office' Luffy complained but quickly started laughing when Sanji's shirt was hanging off his frame by mere threads while the shorts fell off completely. Sanji was left pretty much clad in silky dark blue boxers with pink hearts on, white pulled up socks and his dress shoes. Nami didn't really want to look but Usopp braved a wolf whistle before joining Luffy in laughing. Chopper half hid his face feeling mortification on Sanji's behalf and Robin continued to observe things as calmly as ever. Sanji, who was completely enraged at this point, ripped off the remnants of his top and propelled at Zoro with new gusto, attacking relentlessly. Zoro dipped, blocked and got the odd jab in at Sanji. Sanji managed to clip Zoro's jaw and wind him a couple of times.

Luffy, knowing that the fight was unlikely to end soon perched next to Nami on the arm rest of her settee and propped his chin up on a fist.

'So, tell me what happened when you met Zoro and Sanji' Luffy asked Nami calmly. Nami looked across at him then at the other three who were now looking back at her expectantly. Nami sighed and then started to tell her story of all that had happened since lunch, including the holdup at Kokoro's Cafe to her wanting safety from the two guys who helped her out of a sticky situation, then to what happened to the police car that followed them unknowingly, then how she ended up in front of them here. Everyone was listening intently ignoring the background grunts and curses from the idiot duo. Robin was nodding sympathetically while Chopper looked on amazed, completely enraptured by the tale. Usopp had interrupted the story several times to make sure is heroic deeds got the mention they deserved. Instead of him just doing away with Smoker, he had managed to stop 12 chasing police cars with one perfectly aimed jungle pellet that had transformed into a forest covering the motorway. Nami looked at him in confusion every time he exaggerated the car chase making the ever observant Robin understand that the event probably wasn't as half as bad as currently being explained.

'Hmm' Luffy voiced while looking upwards to the right and tapping his bottom lip with a finger in thought. 'Can you trust this Kokoro to stay quiet about what happened to you?'

Nami a bit startled by the question said 'Yes, I can trust her to protect me from the police. The rest of the people in cafe at the time, I couldn't say the same for'.

'Don't worry about the other people, most probably won't want to get involved. It's the sad way people react these days, they're scared, even so, you weren't the one waving around guns so you're probably fine'. Luffy added seriously.

'Robin, go and call Iceberg and tell him what happened and that Nami is working for us now' Luffy continued.

'What?' Nami exclaimed while Robin nodded and moved away to a phone far enough out of the way from Zoro and Sanji's fight.

'You can't just decide that!' Nami stated indignantly.

'Yes I can and you'd be the perfect addition to ONE PIECE, we really need someone to help us with our finances and if you're good at making maps you can help pinpoint where new crews are being set up across Grand Line'. Luffy said excitedly, his eyes sparkling.

Nami was momentary silenced, she had just walked into the office of ONE PIECE, the much admired and quietly celebrated heroes of truth baring and had just been offered a job. A good and exciting job at that. She looked at the people in the office, no one looked older then 30, and she was quite surprised a small group of young people could have such an impact on the city, consequently making their work famous across the globe. Looking them all over with more scrutiny she couldn't help but think that the majority of them were probably insane, they certainly weren't what she had suspected but then no one really knew who they were.

'How much will I get paid?' The only really important question Nami needed to know.

'Ehh, how much do you get paid now?' Luffy asked in some confusion.

'§30,000 Beri per annum' Nami said distastefully like it was the worst sum of money ever created.

'Then we'll give you §60,000 Beri' Luffy cheered happily while throwing his arms up in the air.

'What!' Usopp exclaimed echoing Nami whose face lit up in surprise and joy.

'Luffy, none of us get paid that amount of money! That isn't fair; we've been here much longer as well.' Usopp pointed out.

'Oh right' Luffy looked confused again, 'well, I guess everyone should be paid the same', he scratched his chin, 'you see, we really need someone to help us with our finances'. Luffy pointed happily to Nami. Nami could only raise an eyebrow at Luffy who clearly had little idea of how to look after employees basic needs, such as money. She could only wonder what the state of finances was now and what she would have to sort out. Suddenly things were looking a little less shiny.

Robin came back over and sat on the arm rest as before. 'Mr. Iceberg is very happy for Nami and wishes her luck with her new career'.

'Hooray!' Luffy whooped. This was slightly overshadowed by a loud curse from Zoro which brought everyone's attention back to the fighting pair. Zoro was now sporting a bleeding split lip while Sanji seemed to be covered in pink strip like marks from where he'd been hit with either the sword or the sword hilt. Sanji and Zoro appeared to be locked in a wrestling match, Sanji trying to push away by wedging his right knee against Zoro's hip and forcing himself back to try unbalance the green oaf. Meanwhile, Zoro had Sanji in a headlock.

'Watch where you're shoving your knees, idiot cook!' Zoro grunted 'The crown jewels are off limits!'

'Crown jewels? Heh, yeah right fucking Marimo arsehole' Sanji countered a bit muffled from the majority of his face being plastered to Zoro's chest. It would be fair to say that his face was turning ever so slightly purple from the lack of oxygen.

Zoro deciding it was time to end things lifted Sanji off the ground, admittedly this could be dangerous with his deadly legs but luckily Sanji seemed to be momentarily stunned. Zoro lifted Sanji on to his shoulder then flipped him off behind his back. Sanji of course had his usually quick reflexes, landing heavily to his feet and getting in a quick swipe at his right ankle, which sent a sharp spasming pain up his leg.

'You stupid shitty idiot' Sanji spat gulping in breaths of precious air.

Zoro moved across the space and got in a low defensive position just waiting for Sanji to charge with another attack. He wasn't disappointed as Sanji soon started to run towards him building up momentum. He leapt jabbing his right leg towards Zoro's face while flipping mid air so he could continue to fight while in a handstand. It was one of Sanji's most effective and powerful moves. However, he was startled for the second time during the fight when instead of landing on his hands as planned; he was lifted up from his torso by Zoro's katana and hilt.

Zoro remained crouched as he started to lift Sanji up once again, centring Sanji's weight throughout his frame Zoro prepared to do a clean and jerk weightlifting move using Sanji as his weight. He first rested the weight across his clavicles then with his bent knees and using all of his concentration swiftly straightened out in order to propel, or jerk, Sanji up and over his head. Rather than locking his arms in position, like he would normally do with this weightlifting move, Zoro continued to push back lifting the sword and hilt to use as extra force to project Sanji up and away from him.

'Gahh!' Sanji shouted as he was literally flying across the room on a collision course for Nami and Luffy. Luffy who quickly cottoned on to the situation with his equally speedy reaction time did nothing other than hold his palm out to stop Sanji from ploughing into him. Sanji desperately tried to flip himself over and wheeled his arms trying somehow to slow himself down. Nami who didn't have quite the same reaction time as the other guys could only stare wide eyed at the approaching Sanji flying object. Sanji grunted as he was forcefully stopped by landing head first into Luffy's freakishly strong and rock solid arm. The unfortunate part was how he then dropped face first right into Nami's crotch. The rest of his body, which was still half naked, was sprawled across the sofa; Sanji couldn't help but think there were worse places he could have landed.

Nami looked down at the unmoving mop of blonde hair that was face down in her lap with growing anger. She had had just about enough of those two idiots and this exhausting day. Channelling her frustrations and anger into her fist she suddenly jerked upwards to stand up having the desired effect of knocking Sanji onto the floor. There the idiot looked up at her with a supremely happy love struck expression. That stupid face tipped her over the edge and she rammed her fist at full speed into Sanji's only visible eye.

'You, god damn idiot!' She screeched then turned to look thunderously at Zoro.

Zoro who wasn't intimidated by many people in the world may have to admit that this girl was bat shit crazy, and her punches really hurt from her super bony hands. Observing Sanji on the floor, it appeared that she had actually knocked him out with that right hook. Scary. Zoro shuffled across to the bag that held the rest of his swords inside then avoiding Nami as much as possible announced that he was going for a shower and swiftly made his way across to the elevator once again, soon disappearing.

'Wow' was all Luffy could say as he looked at the unmoving Sanji on the floor.

'I think you'll fit in nicely' Robin added, addressing Nami. Nami just breathed trying to calm her anger but relaxed a little to Robin's comment and amused smile.

Chopper and Usopp just stared at Nami with equal thoughts about how incredibly terrifying she was when she got angry. She clearly had worse mood swings then Sanji. A strong shiver went down Choppers spine in fear. Luffy started to poke the prone body with his foot in amazement that Sanji had been knocked out. Sanji and Zoro were some of the toughest people he knew and he's never seen either of them knocked out before.

Chopper after pushing his fear of Nami back a little soon realised that someone needed his help. Quickly switching into doctor mode, he grabbed a saggy cushion and crouched besides Sanji, gently placing it under his head. He checked Sanji's pulse which luckily was normal, he then gently opened Sanji's eyelid on his already swelling eye. This produced a slight groan form said man, which made Chopper sigh in relief.

'He'll be okay' Chopper confirmed 'he'll have one hell of a shiner for a while though, Usopp could you get me some ice in a cloth?' Copper asked kindly.

'Sure' Usopp said and went to perform his task. Nami continued to look down on Sanji with a cross expression. She may be starting to feel a little bit guilty but at the same time she thought that he fully deserved what he got. She crossed her arms over her chest in both defence and comfort.

'Ms. Nami, how about I show you where you'll be working and explain how you can help us here' Robin offered sensing that it was a good time to move Nami on from the situation. She was sure that Nami would have the place more streamlined within weeks judging by her personality. But someone had to explain the reasons why they tried to remain secretive and make sure that Nami followed and understood the rules of the organisation.

Slightly startled Nami replied 'Oh, okay' and followed after Robin as they made their way over to a quiet corner of the office overlooking the river. Usopp returned with the ice in a clean dish towel and Chopper held it to Sanji's eye applying a gentle pressure. A shiver racked through Sanji's body and he groaned once more. Luffy who was getting worried at the fact that Sanji hadn't woken up yet decided it would be a good idea to throw Nami's left over juice onto Sanji's face to rouse him, he'd seen it work in films but he elicited a complaint from Chopper for his actions.

Sanji groaned once more but finally came around opening his eye in pain and sitting up. 'Who the hell threw water on me?' Sanji asked annoyed. No one decided to tell him that it was fresh apple juice knowing that he'd go mental but Usopp helpfully pointed towards Luffy.

'Here Sanji, hold this against your eye' Chopper insisted 'are you feeling okay?'

'Yeah' he sighed getting up.

'Sanji, when are you going to start cooking?' Luffy asked instead 'a feast, remember?' he said sounding concerned at the last part.

Sanji sighed again 'damn it Luffy, let me get cleaned up then I'll start cooking alright?' then he too started to drag his body over to the elevator to go up to the next floor.

'Yey!' Luffy cheered 'lot's of meat remember' he called. 'Just be careful Sanji' Chopper piped in at the end looking at Sanji with a concerned expression.

'Yeah, yeah' Sanji waved off as he too soon disappeared into the opened doors of the elevator.

Nami who had been observing the wobbly Sanji get up, sighing in mini relief. Turned aside to Robin who was currently connecting up a computer for Nami to use on a desk towards the back left corner of the room.

'Are there showers upstairs or something?' Nami asked.

Robin calmly explained how all of the male members, except two, lived on the floor above and that it had been transformed into a luxury apartment with the help of Franky, Iceberg's step-brother. Most meals were all eaten together when possible and despite there being a kitchen area on this floor for snacks, the main kitchen and dining area was situated upstairs, these were mainly Sanji's domain and he was fiercely protective over them. She explained that the other two members were Franky and Brook, who didn't live here, and that it was doubtful they would be around today to meet her, however she might meet Makino, Luffy's mother who owned the bar downstairs and consequently the rest of the building, which she rented out.

Robin continued the introduction to explain that the organisation almost relies completely on sponsorship deals and donations. They weren't selling any products, they were campaigning on behalf of the public for a right to truthful free information and have a say in how they're governed. They sold themselves as a brand; ONE PIECE, they didn't communicate any personal information with those they asked for sponsorship from. She then went on to explain that to most people they meet, they were part of the crew "Straw Hats". Acting as a crew, which in a way they were, made it easier for them to mingle with others and gain information. They would take on jobs pretending to be a legit crew to gain or swap valuable information, which consequently was their other main source of income. Robin spoke of the team getting an equal wage based on an hourly rate, that some members had other sources of income from only working part-time. Zoro received money from swordsman championships and as a coach to under 12's in kendo, Sanji worked as a chef, Franky was a successful carpenter and Brook was a musician. Chopper was working on his medical degree at Grand Line University but worked when he had the time. She made it clear never to mention that you are part of ONE PIECE to anyone, not even family members or other loved ones. Herself, Luffy, Usopp and now Nami were the only full time members of the organisation. A handful of people did know who they were through some kind of connection to ONE PIECE members, these included Iceberg, Makino and mayor of Grand Line candidate Shanks Redhead. They had proved to be trustworthy and strong allies for their cause but it was important that any ONE PIECE discussion with them was never communicated where one could be overheard. Robin recommended that code, which Nami would be expected to learn and memorise, should be used at all times if any ONE PIECE matters needed to be discussed outside of the office.

Nami breathed out in wonder. There sure were strict rules and she wasn't sure if she'll remember all of this stuff she's been told. There was an underlying sense of excitement under her bafflement, she would make sure to leave her mark on the world and here was a better platform then she could have ever imagined.

Luffy came over to join them and then took Nami to the jobs board. A huge pin board spanning at least three metres was stuffed with cases that the public wanted answers for. From minor things like recovering personal items to other matters more poignant such as why cancer suffers treatment funding was cut at the same time the health minister got a §1,500,000 Beri bonus and a shiny new BMW convertible rewarded to him for his good work. The most prominent of all of the cases was a centred photograph of a freckled, dark haired young man wearing an orange cowboy hat with a friendly grin on his face and bold text written underneath stating "Who murdered Ace?"

'That's my brother' Luffy pointed to the photograph, Nami's eyes widened not knowing what to say. 'He's the reason why we're all here doing this' Luffy explained 'I think he'd be really proud of us all' Luffy said with a smile. The slightly awkward developing mood was interrupted by an intercom message booming across the room. Nami actually jumped as she wasn't expecting it making Luffy giggle.

'Ladies and idiots, dinner is served' came Sanji's agitated tone.

'Yey' Luffy whooped and ran off towards the elevator at full speed followed by Usopp and Chopper.

Startled Nami observed a giant clock placed above the elevator doors and was shocked to see that it was now 6:30 in the evening. Robin approached her again and gestured calmly towards the elevator with a soft smile on her face. Nami followed after her at a much calmer rate then the boys who had already disappeared upstairs after racing one another.

'Are you ready?' is all Robin said as she pressed the button for the third floor. Nami looked at her in confusion but Robin simply remained aloof and stared forward with a small amused smile on her face.

The doors opened up to the sounds of chaos, several shouts could be heard and several banging sounds accompanied them. Robin walked out as calm as ever with her smile still in place. Nami was surprised to observe an absolutely huge kitchen directly to her right shining in stainless steel and marble from huge panoramic windows directly behind it. The entrance was carpeted in cream while internal walls were painted in solid block colours besides the exposed brickwork of the outer structure. The high ceilings gave the space a very light and airy atmosphere giving the impression of an art gallery or something similar. Turning a corner around the kitchen a magnificent polished wooden table sat centre stage filled to the brim with meats, salads, vegetables, fish, drinks and sides. The table itself was a 12 seater sat on a wood panelled floor and encased in crisp lime green walls showcasing some interesting modern artwork in monochrome. The beauty was somewhat ruined by Sanji repeatedly beating back Luffy's roaming hands from grabbing an entire ham hock with many curses.

'Keep your stupid hands to yourself' Sanji protested batting grabbing hands back with a frying pan. The rest of the seated guys were calmly waiting until the fight finished, knowing better then to start without Sanji's say so. Nami couldn't help but think that the scene was rather comical. There was a friendly looking lady standing behind Luffy with mirth written all over her face who she could only assume was Makino from what Robin had told her earlier.

'Wait until the ladies have arrived before you eat everything in sight you pig' Sanji continued still battling back flying arms.

'Mr. Cook, we are here' Robin informed gently, taking a seat next to Chopper. Sanji soon spun around revealing a large purple eye from where Nami had punched him, before Nami could take a seat herself next to Robin, she was whisked away around the other side to a pulled out orange cushioned chair for her to take next to Zoro.

'Here you are beautiful maidens, a feast just for you' Sanji declared suavely to the woman.

'Sanji, wasn't this food all for me?' Luffy questioned followed by a solid 'No' from everyone but Nami and Robin.

'Luffy, you should share all the food amongst your friends' Makino told Luffy while ruffling his hair.

'Please have a seat and join us Makino, it's been far too long since I last saw your handsome face' Sanji wiggled up to Makino making it known that no female could escape his attention.

'Sorry Sanji but I have to get back to work, enjoy the potato salad and sausages that I brought up for your party' Makino smiled then gave Luffy a kiss on the forehead. She then made her way over to Nami and introduced herself, welcoming her to the team and shook her hand before going off on her way.

After the brief introduction with Makino, that lasted no longer than a minute or so, Nami was shocked to discover that in that small amount of time Luffy had managed to eat an entire roast chicken and two whole seabass and was now in the process of eating through Makino's giant bowl of potato salad. She noticed that no one bar Sanji was watching what he was doing. Shaking his head Sanji came to seat himself on the other side of Nami. Picking up a ladle he threw it at pull pelt towards Luffy, a slight din was heard as it smacked him square in the forehead.

'Oww, Sanji?' Luffy questioned actually removing his head from the bowl before him.

'You're supposed to wait for the rest of us to start as well you damn glutton!' Sanji growled but with no real force behind it. Sighing out loudly at the lost cause that was their idiot leader, Sanji invited the rest of the team to dig in.

Hands went out grabbing after things in a vengeance; the sight was like a flock of vultures that hadn't been fed in over a month. Nami just sat back with her mouth hanging open, Zoro was battling it out with Luffy over a piece of steak while Luffy's other hand grabbed an entire piled high plate of shish kebabs. Sanji was trying smack as many hands out of the way as possible so he could serve a few items to the ladies and himself. Usopp had a strategy of waiting for Luffy's arms to retract back to his place then diving for things before Luffy would grab for more. Zoro after winning his steak fight then started battling out with chop sticks over the salmon sushi with Sanji. Chopper was happily munching away on a salad, which was placed furthest away from Luffy's seat at the head of the table giving him the best fighting chance of eating his favourite dish. Robin just waited with a calm smile while she helped herself to a generous glass full of red wine. After the main group calmed down a little from managing to get a full plate each, Nami sat completely astonished at the flailing arms of Luffy still grabbing anything in sight at an ungodly speed. The plate of sausages which was still half full with at least two dozen big fat juicy bangers was tipped up directly into Luffy's wide open mouth sliding in and down his throat within seconds.

Usopp after swallowing a mouthful of mashed potato noticed that Nami was distracted by the human vacuum. 'It's best not to watch him while he eats' he said by waving in a general direction towards Luffy. Nami then noticed again that not one person looked over at Luffy while they ate; they had their heads turned slightly towards the other end of the table.

'It certainly helps to keep things down if you look elsewhere' Zoro added in his deep tone still chewing on a piece of meat.

'Nami my lovely, please try to enjoy your meal, I picked out many dishes for you in case there are things you don't like.' Sanji added with a sincere smile while he patted the back of her hand. Chopper gave supportive thumbs up before he went to grab a stuffed mushroom, also situated at the end of the table furthest away from Luffy.

Following the advice Nami soon tucked in to some of the tastiest food she had ever tasted in her life. Everything was an exciting explosion of flavours on her tongue and soon her focus was entirely on her meal rather than the bedlam of the group meal much to Sanji's delight.

A friendly level of chat developed over the evening meal which was abruptly disrupted by an extremely loud and lengthy burp coming from Luffy. While Sanji and Nami both reacted in disgust, Usopp and Chopper both burst out laughing. Robin finished off her glass of wine satisfied while Zoro polished off his third bottle of Jack Daniels. Luffy sat back in his seat wearing an extremely satisfied expression while patting his full stomach. Before him a number of plates, dishes and bowls were stacked precariously with bits of source slopped across or dripping off sides from a height easily topping two foot tall.

'Excellent meal Sanji' Luffy acknowledged 'right, let's talk business' he quickly moved on.

'Zoro, Robin, I need the pair of you to head to Foxy's Golden Bar and Grill tomorrow night. Our old rivals, crew CP9 will be there. Kaku has boasted that he has some useful information for us although what it is he wouldn't elaborate on when I replied to his message. I want you to go and find out what he has or what he wants. Call immediately and get out of there if you suspect any of the situation is suspicious. Remember you are part of the crew Straw Hats. I've reserved you a table in track and field and they have some really yummy food there and some cool entertainment you'll probably have an awesome night'. Luffy finished excitedly after the initial seriousness of the case.

'I'll look forward to it' Robin almost purred as she looked across to Zoro with and almost predatory smile. Zoro, although not thrilled by the idea of having to spend an evening alone with Robin, acknowledged she was at least much more efficient at worming out facts and was a hell of a lot less annoying then Sanji. Zoro just grunted in acceptance. Predictably, within seconds of Sanji hearing Luffy's decision, he was making strong objections to it.

'Luffy, you cannot send that moss brained oaf over there out for an evening with the delicate Robin'.

'Huh, why not?' Luffy questioned confused, personally he thought Robin was pretty tough.

'Marimo has all the manors and socialising skills of a troll' Sanji emphasised like he was trying to win a debate using solid facts, making Usopp chuckle in the process 'his company should never be inflicted upon anyone of the fairer sex. Not to mention that he's an idiot who gets lost walking on a straight path, how do you expect him to get across town? Surely I would be much better company and a better intellectual choice to accompany the lady Robin tomorrow evening'.

'But I thought you were working at the restaurant tomorrow night and Zoro's cool!' Luffy questioned. 'You need to buy me more food as well'.

Sanji cursed under his breath as he'd forgotten that indeed he was at work tomorrow night. He cursed some more at the fact he'd lost Usopp's bet all thanks to the Marimo's crap directional skills. Zoro just huffed and scraped his chair back behind him then walked to the kitchen to leave his empty plate near the sink. He could bitch back at the crap cook but he'd rather sleep. Besides that red haired witch had damaged Sanji enough for one day, he'd probably be carrying that black eye for a good couple of weeks. Yet another nutter had joined the team, then again it's what Luffy was attracted to. Once Zoro returned Sanji was sulking and Robin was preparing to leave.

'I'm going to get the train Ms. Nami if you would care to leave with me? Robin enquired. Nami agreed and the girls prepared to leave with Sanji insisting he escort them to the station. Poor Usopp and Chopper started cleaning up after the meal, everyone knew better then to let Luffy go in the kitchen. That just left Zoro and the giant child that was Luffy.

'Hey Zoro, let's play old school Street Fighter! If you win I'll buy you drinks all night at Makino's but if I win you have to buy me all the hot wings I want.' Luffy said with a cheeky grin while he jumped and started swinging from Zoro's thick neck.

'You're on little man' Zoro smirked and made his way down a carpeted corridor 'you're going to regret that challenge'.

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><p>AN: I have had to make some of the ages up for the purposes of this story so they fit a little better; I also found it particularly hard to refer to a lift as an elevator. However, I believe, though I'm not 100% sure, that most nations use the latter term.

A note on my previous chapter, the car chase was set in the British (and a handful of other nations) sense, with driving on the left-hand side of the road with the drivers seat placed in the right-hand side of a car.

I'm surprised at myself at how quickly I got this chapter out, don't expect this often though, life get's in the way sometimes.

Finally, it would be great to get some reviews or even just some thoughts.

Thanks


	4. Sporting Good Fun

A/N: Wow, chapter 4 is finally out, which was surprising quite tough to finish off.

This may have a few mistakes in, I'm sorry.

Just a reminder that I have changed some of the ages of the characters up for this story.

Enjoy

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><p>Robin and Zoro pulled up in the car park outside Foxy's Golden Bar and Grill, a large warehouse structure situated within an entertainment and shopping complex in Punk Hazard, east Grand Line. The place as usual was crawling with teens and blaring music played out of car windows. Some skate boarders were attempting to jump over waste bins, while street dancers were having a dance battle outside a video gaming arcade. Scantily clad teen girls were draping themselves across their boyfriends or inanimate objects trying to appear alluring whilst the slightly more fashion conscious guys and girls were spending up in the shops. Couples, groups and a few families could be spotted dining or heading to the cinema or bowling complex.<p>

Robin stepped out of her black Mini Cooper Coupé in a figure hugging thigh length black pencil dress with black leather slouch knee high boots. Her long raven locks were slicked back and shone in all of its glossy radiance while a shot of scarlet red painted her lips. Zoro stepped out of the passenger seat and stretched slightly. He didn't own a car himself as he generally didn't like driving around Grand Line unless completely necessary. As with most big cities, the traffic was always a complete nightmare but Robin offered a lift tonight saying it was necessary if he wanted to get here on time. It was just about to turn 8:30 at night, the time when Luffy had booked their table for. Zoro made his way around to Robin in twisted navy blue jeans and graphical print white t-shirt, which fitted just a little snug in his own opinion. He felt half naked on this outing as Luffy had flatly refused him bringing his katana along. He had tried to make a little effort with his appearance as he knew Robin wouldn't stand for anything less, wearing his smart-ish addidas pumps and groomed his green hair so it was mostly swept back and tousled neatly. Still, he couldn't really do much about the scar across his eye, which in most people's opinion made him look like a thug no matter what he was wearing.

Robin and Zoro started to make their way over to the entrance. Foxy's was a pretty ugly building from the outside, it was a plain square unit that was slightly off white from various pollutants inflicting their damage to the paintwork over time. The company logo was a rip off of the Olympic rings, by trying to avoid any copyright issues Foxy simply turned the rings into hexagons then added a stupid cartoon fox jumping over the central shape. This overly large and tacky logo was lit up above the double door entrance so you could do nothing but notice it even if you were about a mile away passing by on the nearest dual carriageway. To rip off the association with the Olympics further, there were two flaming copper torches mounted on either side of the entrance way. Making their way inside, they stopped by the welcome desk to await directions to their table. A chirpy young lady dressed in cycling gear grabbed them some menus and lead them into the main dining area. The restaurant had a 1,000 seat capacity, which was split into four dining "athletic arena" sections around the edge of the building. The centre of the room was dedicated to a games or dance area designed to look like a hockey pitch. Robin and Zoro were lead to the left back corner of the room where a fake 100m running track was laid out in 8 lanes. The track was probably nearer the 50m mark in length and at least half of it was running up the wall at the back of the room with the finish line curving on to the ceiling. They were brought to a stop next to a 4 person table with bench seats. The waitress left the menus, removed two of the place settings and wished them a pleasant meal before moving back to the front again.

Neither Robin nor Zoro had ever been to Foxy's before although they had both heard gossip about what to expect from the place. They both initially took in their surroundings slightly amazed at the range of decoration in the huge space. The track and field section had a number of tables each with cushioned bench seats painted to look like hurdles. The track was painted in perspective as it would appear in relation to the ground on the bench backs. All the tables were laid out facing the same direction so this paint effect was viewed to its full potential. The table was a wood panelled tub topped with thick clear perspex; a scaled model of the long jump complete with scaled athlete jumping into the sand decorated the inside. The table looked as though it was standing on a javelin at each end of the table and even the condiments were arranged in custom made hollowed out discus.

There were three other sections to sit in, water and aquatics, cycling and BMX and equestrian. A bar section occupying a fairly small proportion of the back wall was decorated to look like a boxing ring and a dj and events area in the middle of the right side was made out of gymnastic equipment. Directly behind where they were sat was a built in water feature replicating a small section of a canoe slalom with life sized canoe and mannequin positioned to look like he's rowing downstream. The rest of the water section was covered in perspex tubes at various heights filled with bubbling water. There were three sail boat's converted to family or large group dining areas; they even had a two levelled replica diving platform providing extra seating as well. The tables were all tiled like a swimming pool and the section waiting staff were uniformed in swimwear complete with swim caps and goggles.

The cycling section was slightly raised on a platform with a wavy boarder designed to look like a BMX track in fake grass and tarmac with model riders jumping the dips. The entire section of surrounding wall had a curved velodrome style track complete with life sized racing bikes and mannequins motorised with parts to make their legs move in a cycling motion. The models were crouched forward to look like they were racing and angled in towards diners as they were positioned to be taking a bend in the corner. They couldn't see what the tables were designed like from where they were sat because of the boarder hiding them from view but the floor seemed to look like a road design from the small sections visible to them. The waiting staff in this section, much like the girl on the waiting desk were dressed in cycling shorts and t-shirts complete with racing cycling helmet.

The final dining section was designed to look like an enclosure for equestrian events. A patterned wooden fence surrounded most of the area with only a couple of gaps for diners and staff to move in and out. This was constructed on a large clear perspex floor which was sat on a large sand pit. There were two life size fake horses with riders on their backs; one looked like it was trotting through the ground while another was leaping over a jump from the back wall. The tables were stylised to look like show jumps meaning the ends had miniature replica landmarks "holding up" the bench like table structure. Zoro could spot miniatures of the Baratie building, the Reverse Mountain and Poneglyph monument to name but a few famous Grand Line landmarks. The waiting staff here were fully dressed up in shirts, ties, jackets, riding bottoms, riding boots and a riding hat, Zoro wondered if the staff in that section were completely and utterly boiling hot in that entire garb. He also observed the unmistakable black top hat with silver ribbon that could only belong to the perpetually sour faced Rob Lucci, self proclaimed leader of the CP9 crew. He gestured across to Robin that he'd found where they were sat but it seemed that she had already spotted them herself. Kaku, who Zoro swore must be some kind of long lost cousin to Usopp with his ridiculously long square nose, decided to take this moment to lean forward and wave at them.

'Well, they know we're here at least' Robin observed 'shall we order?'

Zoro shrugged, he didn't know exactly what was supposed to happen tonight so assumed Robin had a better idea. He turned around fully to face her and skimmed the menu. Robin was looking particularly alluring tonight, that dress on that body and those eyes such a deep blue they sometimes appeared violet couldn't help but attract a wandering eye. Robin was a bit more mature then the majority of the gang, at 30 she wasn't the eldest member but was by far the most adult. She was curvy and voluptuous but still slim, she was quite tall, matching Zoro in height but he put most of it down to her fondness for high heeled footwear. She leaned forward slightly to rest her elbow on the table and prop her hand under her chin. She looked him in the eye briefly and smiled with those red full lips. Zoro just watched her, the hair cascading around her shoulder and resting on her breast, the two full mounds of flesh looking like they wanted to escape from the restrictive black fabric of her dress. The pale pinkish skin contrasting dramatically and sinuously with the darkness of her hair and outfit, she was dangerous, in more ways then one. Not only was she beautiful but she was one of the most intelligent woman Zoro had ever encountered. Her knowledge of political history, policies and events were second to none, add on top of that general knowledge from maths to science and languages. Robin knew it all. She could take care of herself and had a strong sense of pride and independence although Zoro believed she desired company more than he would willingly seek it. Although she wasn't the strongest physically, her knowledge of vital points on the human body had seen her knock out many a foe quickly and efficiently. Zoro had also witnessed her once try to unman Franky using one hand only after he'd made a sexist remark about the size of her chest. She was someone to be respected and perhaps a little scared of.

Zoro was interrupted from his musings by a waiter asking if they were ready to order. He was dressed in long shorts with a running vest in matching colours and patterns; he also had sweat bands around his wrists and forehead, he looked really quite stupid in Zoro's opinion. Zoro looked across to Robin to see if she was ready, she simply smiled and nodded her head. Zoro who had barely even looked at the menu knew regardless that he wanted pulled pork and beer.

'Hmm, I'll have a Judo Mojito, which sounds very interesting' Robin started 'I'll also have an On Your Marks salad with the Balance Beam chicken' Robin smiled and chuckled slightly at the themed menu.

Zoro frowned; he'd now actually have to look at what things were named because of the ridiculous overuse of the sports theme. Considering that the menu was a laminated duel sided A3 sheet with loads of options to choose from and the waiter was looking at him expectantly, Zoro quickly gave up and just ordered without any theme names.

'What beer do you have on tap?' he asked. After the waiter listed off several options Zoro ordered the 1.5 litre mug of "Going for Gold".

'I'd like some pulled pork with fries' Zoro declared deadpan and serious, the waiter responded by looking quite unimpressed with this order and then further explained what pulled pork dishes they offered. Zoro selected "The Pork Jump" which was a pork and beef burger topped with bacon, cheese and pulled pork between ciabatta bread and a side of "Double Skulls Fries". The waiter after confirming their order and declaring that his name was Stuart if they needed any further assistance finally walked away.

Zoro slumped slightly in his seat looking back toward the canoe with a bored expression and like he'd rather be anywhere else but here. Robin, who by nature always observes a situation before she gets involved, raised an eyebrow at this.

'Quite an interesting place Mr. Swordsman, don't you think?' Robin tried to converse.

Zoro sighed and seemed to slump further but brought his attention back to Robin and just looked at her for a few seconds before replying with another sigh and a grunt.

'It's pretty cool, in a freaky way but it's also way cheesy' Zoro finally said in a bored voice and gestured to the surroundings with a vague hand wave motion 'why on Earth would Kaku and Lucci want to meet in this place?'

Zoro looked Robin in the eye after sweeping across her chest once more with his deep dark cornea expanding slightly to take in more of the view. Robin's subtle smile peaked slightly more from observing his reaction. She adjusted herself in the seat so she was sat with more of a straight back and crossed her arms under her bust.

'I wasn't the one who took the call but I gather they wanted to meet somewhere lively and very public so a fight wouldn't break out like last time' Robin stated with her usual serene smile.

Zoro grunted in disbelief. Admittedly their last encounter with CP9 had ended with an all out brawl. Jyabura, who is normally the more rational member of their group, started laying into Luffy that his crew, the Straw Hats, were weak and a complete joke. Zoro at the time had to wonder if Jyabura was drunk or something because he wasn't acting like normal but Luffy being Luffy wouldn't take that insult in any way, shape or form and sent him flying with one of his freakishly strong punches to the chest. Unfortunately, Jyabura ended up stumbling into Kalifa, the woman who famously screeches a sexual harassment claim at any man who comes within a one meter radius of her. No one understood, for that very reason, why she joined a crew where she was the only female member. Lucci had looked even more grumpy and displeased then normal and ended up punching Luffy back, sending him flying into some guy's watch shop window, which cracked from top to bottom from the impact. Evidently Lucci obviously didn't think too highly of us either. Long story short, everyone then started fighting their corner. They had actually both been hired to protect a heavy gambler called Paulie from money sharks. Luffy had ended up taking the job as a favour for Iceberg, Franky's step brother. Paulie himself had some kind of connection to the CP9 guys, which was why they both ended up protecting him.

The fight happened outside of a bookies, the obvious place a serial gambler would want to hang out. Turns out, while we had been fighting outside, the gambling guy had managed to win a significant amount of money to pay off his debtors. The main money shark was, quite surprisingly, actually the previous governmental Finance Secretary, George Spandem. Luffy fed this bonus bit of information to Shanks, Mayor of Grand Line campaigner and close acquaintance, to avoid any connections between the Straw Hats and ONE PIECE. Paulie and CP9 knew all the findings as much as they did to have been able to put two and two together if the story had been exposed by ONE PIECE. Once Shanks got Spandem investigated, he was exposed for using public spending money gained through taxes, to loan out privately then adding an extortionate amount of interest placed on repayments. He pocketed this money along with his already generous governmental salary tax free and bought many fancy houses and luxury holidays from the proceeds. Spandem was fired from his position in the government within hours of the expose. His full investigation was still ongoing in the justice system but it's likely he'll eventually have to go to prison to do some time. Anyway, the Straw Hats had won that brawl although they'd had to admit it was a tough fight, even Luffy was worn out. Lucci was made to apologise under threat of his top hat being destroyed, which was rather funny to see his face look genuinely worried. The incident, which must have happened a good 6 or 7 months ago, had resulted in CP9 pretty much avoiding or ignoring the Straw Hats from what can only be assumed as from humiliation.

The set up to this current situation was completely different though and most of the team wasn't even here to cause trouble. Robin generally tried to avoid physical confrontations and Zoro only really fought when provoked or in competition, he didn't even have his swords. It then suddenly dawned on him that the reason why he was forbidden to bring his swords tonight was probably because Luffy also wanted to avoid any possible fights breaking out. Zoro rolled his eyes and sighed once again, he wasn't that much of a barbarian, he deserved way more credit then what was clearly being shown to him.

'Right, well, what's supposed to be going down tonight?' Zoro huffed, now a little annoyed.

'In all honesty, I'm not sure. Kaku just phoned insisting we meet up, that in itself is an unusual request; he didn't specify any further details though so I say we may as well enjoy our meal together until they make a move.' Robin stated and her eyes glinted as she stared Zoro down.

'Hmm, I guess so' Zoro replied non committal. He never fully got Robin, he always felt as if he was being mocked somehow but couldn't work out how. Much like himself, she didn't have any close family, Luffy and the team were the closest thing they had to one. He was strangely protective of her even though she was a full six years older than him. But then Zoro was protective of all of them and when even he sometimes got bored of all of the constant training he did daily. His team would pick his mood up and cheer him towards his dream; they were all precious to him.

The waiter soon arrived again with their ordered drinks. Zoro dug in immediately to his giant glass of beer which was surprisingly heady yet refreshing. Robin had a ridiculously long glass filled with ice and bits of plant, it looked weird. The bottom half was green while the top half was red. Robin seemed delighted with it.

'What on Earth is that?' Zoro enquired with interest.

'Oh, this is the Judo Mojito' she giggled. 'The top half is a raspberry mojito, with raspberry purée, the bottom half is normal mint mojito, which is delicious' she declared after taking a sip and her face lit up further. 'Ooh, that's quite potent, something you would like no doubt Mr. Swordsman' she winked. She then continued 'maybe the colours are supposed to represent the different competitors or maybe one got injured and the top half is his blood?' Robin continued excitedly, laughing at her last suggestion.

Another thing Zoro didn't really get about Robin was her conversation, which when not on the job was decidedly morbid in subject matter. Considering her beauty, figure and her amazing mind, her morbid outlook on life was her one major downfall. No one really knew what to say after she went into graphic detail about how something died or the massive amount of pain certain ailments can cause. Zoro just usually nodded and agreed to everything when she spoke of such matters. She seemed really happy this evening, which was nice, she was often quite quiet and controlled. It was good to see her relaxing, Zoro smiled back relaxing further himself.

'Would you like to try some Mr. Swordsman?' Robin asked while pushing her glass slightly across the table towards Zoro.

'Sure' Zoro took the glass and sucked a small amount of the cocktail up through a green curly straw. A burst of rum and fresh mint exploded on his tongue with a slight aftertaste of sweetness. Zoro blew out the minty freshness which had made his tongue tingle ever so slightly; the drink was pretty strong but had a nice balance of flavours. 'Umm, that's pretty nice' Zoro said as he passed the drink back towards Robin 'it's really refreshing'.

'Yes' Robin agreed, 'Shame I can't have another one afterwards' she said a little disheartened.

'Hmm, why not?' Zoro asked until he answered for himself 'Oh, you're driving. That's why I never bother unless forced' Zoro declared as he took another large swig from his giant glass of beer.

'I see, however Mr. Swordsman, I do love my little car plus it would probably be advantageous it we did not get inebriated this evening, for who knows what is to occur?'

Zoro just grunted, generally he didn't get drunk easily and could drink everyone he knew under the table while still being fairly sober at the end of it. The only bit of drinking competition he had came in the form of Shanks Redhead, that eccentric scarlet haired loon could pack away some strong liquor, at least, that's the impression Zoro had because he acted the same way sober as he did potentially wasted from several rounds of drink. He didn't really want to think of what he would be like if he won the Grand Line Mayoral election to then be the actual Mayor, he might actually have to act slightly sensible. Zoro laughed at such a vision.

'Is something funny Mr. Swordsman?' Robin enquired.

'Oh, I was just thinking what it would be like if Shanks did actually become Mayor of Grand Line. He might actually have to be sensible every once in a while' Zoro said with a grin.

'Oh, I agree, it's quite a frightening thought' Robin giggled slightly while smiling fully. 'I can't see him in a formal three piece suit either'.

Zoro laughed outright. Shanks had, after 10 years of hard work, somehow worked his way up in life from fairly humble beginnings. Rather than the public school boy, exclusively educated background, like most people in his position, his father was a tradesman and that's how Shanks started out in life too. One of his main points of call, back in the day, was a toothpaste factory in Dawn; after work he would always call in at Makino's bar where he consequently met the D brothers, Luffy and Ace. Luffy had told them how Shanks would always talk about how he wanted to make life better for people and yet still spent his precious free time to act as a bit of a father figure to the brothers. He'd clearly had a big influence on Luffy proving how you can achieve your dreams if you put in the effort for it. He always acted like a bit of a joker though and mostly dressed like a multicoloured tramp, it's a wonder how so many people took him seriously. Perhaps, Zoro mused, much like Luffy, his heart was in the right place and people could clearly see that he was a person who would work his hardest to help improve life and do it with a smile on his face.

'That I'd like to see, I'm sure Sanji could help out in that department because he's such a priss' Zoro mused.

'Now, now, Mr. Swordsman, there is nothing wrong with wanting to look your best' Robin admonished half heartedly.

'Seriously Robin, it takes him over half an hour just to style his hair!' Zoro's face dropped and scrunched up slightly as if he was suffering from some kind of pain. Robin couldn't help but chuckle.

'You both work so well together though' Robin declared in amusement. Zoro nearly spat out his mouthful of beer he'd just chugged down from hearing such a statement. He ended up coughing a little once he'd swallowed it. 'You both actually complement each other very well' Robin finished.

'Seriously Robin, I think he has to single handily be the most irritating person I have ever met in life' Zoro explained seriously.

Robin just laughed further fully amused 'No one would ever guess so when seeing you both together' she replied full of sarcasm.

'Oh' Robin cut through dropping all amusement in seconds 'Lucci is coming over' she shifted herself to appear imposing, back straight, hands folded in her lap while she stared the man down with her piercing gaze and blank expression.

Zoro looked across the blue hockey pitch in the centre of the room to see the laid back stroll and scowling face of Rob Lucci. He mused slightly that Lucci could probably give Sanji a bit of a run for his money on the priss stakes as Rob was probably even more perfectly groomed then the crap cook. He wore a perfectly fitted black suit with a black shirt and thin white tie. His shoes were pointy and polished. His dark hair was waved symmetrically just to the top of his shoulders, his eyebrows were plucked into an arch and his dark facial hair was trimmed into a hooked "U" shape on his chin. All of this was topped off with his signature top hat. He stood out by an absolute mile in this noisy and overly colourful restaurant where almost everyone was dressed casually. Zoro couldn't help but feel irritated by the approaching man, everything about him screamed arrogance, he sat back with a mirrored deep scowl etched on his face.

Lucci came to a stop by their table and stood in a lazy fashion, leaning back ever so slightly with his hands kept in his pockets. He looked down at the occupants under the rim of his hat, not moving his body or face first looking at Robin's blank face then across to Zoro's looks of annoyance. Lucci smirked slightly.

'No Luffy this evening?' Lucci enquired with a slow deep drawl his eyes once again moving across to look at Robin.

'He had other plans' came her rather aloof reply before she raised an eyebrow in expectation.

'Hmm' Lucci seemed to take this into consideration while staring forward towards the side wall where fake cheering crowds were painted. 'I would have preferred to say this directly to your, ehh, leader' Lucci scowled further like the last word had left a bad taste in his mouth, once again he looked toward Robin as if she could provide the reason for this. Zoro sat back, Robin was better at the negotiating and explaining side of meetings but the waves of displeasure radiating from Lucci was downright insulting. Zoro could almost physically feel his anger rising, pumping his blood just that little bit faster ready to smash this guys miserable face into the table, he crossed his arms across his chest as a barrier for his control.

'Well, you should have been a little more specific when arranging this meeting' Robin stated in a sharp tone 'we have been trusted to represent our crew for this meeting, what you have to say will be dealt with between Zoro and myself, however if you're are just wasting our time' Robin emphasised pointedly 'I would rather you wouldn't ruin a pleasant evening'.

Zoro was impressed, Robin could remain calm and controlled and yet express just what she needed with words, tone and body language alone. She clearly wasn't impressed either with the way Lucci was implying that neither one of them would usually even register on his radar if he could help it. If Zoro was here with Sanji, like normal, he wouldn't have been surprised if an "accidental" kick happened to go into Lucci's shin.

'What do you actually want Lucci?' Zoro snapped making Lucci turn his unhappy face towards him instead and he did look ever so slightly outraged which couldn't help but please Zoro.

Lucci almost snarled whilst looking down his nose at him 'Well, my crew discovered _something_ which is very likely to interest your group. I was simply trying to be friendly but if you would rather not know what we have to say . . . '

Robin crossed her arms once more under her bust while looking slightly displeased 'I'm not sure who exactly you are trying to kid with words such as "friendly" Mr. Lucci so why don't you stop dillydallying around and tell us your terms'.

Lucci frowned further but before he could continue their waiter Stuart turned up with their food. The atmosphere shifted dramatically, Lucci suddenly switched on the charm before he suavely said; 'I don't wish to disturb your meals so I shall return later in the evening so we can have a chat'. He then bowed slightly before turning on his heal to walk back across the blue pitch and back to his table where Kaku was waiting patiently. Both Robin and Zoro watched him with equal frowns on their faces fully ignoring the waiter asking if they needed anything else.

'You know, I think it's his personality that makes it incredibly difficult to like him in any way' Zoro said after Lucci had once more sat down in the equestrian zone. This prompted a few giggles from Robin who once again started relaxing and smiling.

'That is certainly true' she mused 'well, this looks very good don't you think Mr. Swordsman' Robin asked referring to the food and it surprisingly did. The "balance beam" chicken was cut into slices on a carrot and ginger steaming foam with long strips of carrot, courgette and baby corn balanced on top. The salad was in a medium bowl with little flags marking the start and finish on either side. The salad itself seemed to be mixed leaves with small chunks of pancetta, beans and edible flowers with some kind of sticky dressing over the top. Zoro's "the pork jump" was a burger in essence but not all piled up on top of each other where it becomes so tall it won't even fit in your mouth, well unless you have Luffy's mouth that is. Instead the plate was in two halves with a hollowed out handle in the middle. The toasted ciabatta was cut into two, each half lay on each side of the dish, one of which had a bed of rocket with the burger sat on top and the cheese melted over the top. The other half ciabatta had a generous pile of succulent looking pulled pork chunks. A generous stack of crispy streaky bacon was placed within the hollowed out handle or as the name suggested, it was a pork high jump, Zoro was impressed with the amount of detail Foxy's went into although he still thought the theme was a little tacky. A smallish side of twice cooked chunky fries was the reason behind the double skulls naming and to finish it all off he was provided with three different choices of dips, a tomato relish, sour cream and chive and a homemade barbeque sauce. Zoro started salivating slightly and then felt a little bit sorry for Luffy who would clearly have loved this place.

'Why couldn't Luffy come here tonight? I never asked him yesterday. He would absolutely love it here' Zoro mused whilst picking up a fry to dip in the barbeque sauce.

'Oh, he'd already promised to pose for one of Usopp's portraits' Robin answered distractedly whilst picking up her knife and fork.

'I'm sorry but what?' Zoro replied after swallowing his fry 'is that seriously the reason why he wasn't coming tonight?' Yes, Zoro would admit that Usopp was talented in his paintings, he did abstract stuff, Zoro didn't really understand it but they looked kind of cool. However, it just seemed really unlikely that a drawing would take precedence over any potential ONE PIECE business.

'Well, you know what he's like' Robin waved the explanation away and shrugged, which was actually really unlike her. 'They'll probably be playing games and things as well; he seemed really excited so I didn't want to force him to come here, so I suggested you should come with me instead'.

'Oh right' Zoro mumbled a little flattered that Robin had chosen him to accompany her. She was smiling while staring into his good eye. Zoro had to turn away to hide the fact that, perhaps he was, ever so slightly, embarrassed. Robin was probably the only Straw Hat member who could do such a thing to him, he felt stupidly bashful at that very moment.

'Well, let's dig in' Zoro claimed to change the situation dramatically 'this looks better then what the crap cook could produce'. That was a lie and both Robin and Zoro knew it but it was natural for Zoro and Sanji to insult one another even when they weren't in one another's presence.

Robin took a bite of her chicken and hummed as she let the flavour seep into her taste buds, the sweetness of the carrot contrasted complimentarily with the spice and heat from the ginger. The chicken was moist and hinted at a slight smokiness. 'Um, this is delicious' she stated before digging in again. Zoro, meanwhile, had forked a couple of chunks of the pulled pork into his mouth. He briefly took in the fact that the meat was sweet, smoky and extremely juicy before swallowing and picking up a few strips of bacon to place on his burger. After arranging the bacon as he seemed to consider best he took a large bite of the half burger. The crunchy bread and peppery rocket complimented the rich juicy meat and creamy fatty cheese while the bacon added an extra salty kick, Zoro grunted in approval, this was proper man food.

'Is it really good Zoro?' Robin enquired whilst scooping up some leaves from her salad. Zoro swallowed and cleared his throat looking at Robin in slight suspicion. It was a rare occasion indeed when she actually called him by his name. All she did however was eat the salad she had just scooped and her eyes widened slightly with the first chews. Zoro guessed that she was just relaxed and letting her guard down a little; she would only ever use his name if they were alone but even then she would still mostly address him as "Mr. Swordsman", no doubt the food and alcohol was an added factor as well.

'Yeah, it's pretty nice actually. What's yours like?' Zoro enquired. He wasn't elaborate like the cook was at describing flavours and how stuff had been cooked. He either liked things or didn't like things, simple.

'Very good, the flavour combinations are very eclectic' Zoro just nodded, he'd never admit it but he didn't know what that meant. She seemed to be enjoying it at least.

'So Zoro, tell me what happened to you and Sanji when you went to see Trafalgar Law, Sanji seemed to have wanted to avoid the topic yesterday and I guess with Nami showing up, we never questioned you both'.

Zoro groaned and slumped in a defeated manor, that was one thing he did not want to talk about over dinner. 'Ah, seriously Robin, do you really need to ask? Sanji and I were sent, yet again, on a mission together. From that information alone you can probably guess what inevitably happened' Zoro replied skirting around a real answer.

'You ended up fighting Law?' Robin questioned still eating her chicken in between conversation.

Zoro finished off his drink with a sigh 'not exactly' Zoro said before stuffing more food in his mouth. He tried to wave down one of the waiting staff to get more drink. A cute girl with blonde pig tails and a huge smile in the same silly running uniform took his order for another 1.5 litre mug of ale. Robin remained waiting patiently for the conclusion to the story. 'We ended up getting into a bit of a sticky situation' Zoro eventually determined while scratching his stomach.

Robin perked up with that response and started smiling further with mirth. 'A sticky situation you say?' Robin enquired trying to keep all laughter and enjoyment out of her tone so she could sound serious; Zoro was avoiding her gaze, instead looking off to the side obviously reliving part of the memory by the look of hopelessness on his face.

'Yeah' Zoro eventually responded 'at least we didn't look as bad as Usopp though, I don't think S&M suits him that well' Zoro smirked looking back at Robin who had burst out laughing. She knew Zoro was being purposefully vague about what happened to him and Sanji and she knew his stubbornness and that it was unlikely that she would get all of the answers tonight but she didn't really mind. She was enjoying herself. Zoro much like Luffy could always make her feel at ease, she knew she wasn't the most social of people but she still enjoyed letting her hair down. It was just a shame that they had to work this evening as well. She once more glanced across the room towards where Lucci and Kaku were sat, her face still lit up in laughter and saw that they were both watching them both eagerly. Robin's face dropped slightly and she sighed turning back to Zoro who was once again stuffing his face. She had never met anyone who could eat so much as both Zoro and Luffy, although Luffy was on a whole different scale, Zoro could put his food away for a normal person. But then he trained daily for a number of hours and when you're burning that many calories you needed to put them back into your body to keep you working. Robin glanced over Zoro's appearance, he was certainly muscular and toned but his strive for his dream had also cost him a number of scars. She wasn't sure which was most impressive, the scar down his blinded left eye which had permanently left him with partial sight or the huge gash running across his torso from left shoulder to right hip. Both gained from separate battles with his idol and goal Hawkeye Mihawk. She was amazed to see someone who had practically been cleaved in two, wake to see another day and carry on with life. Luffy also had incredible recuperating abilities; she was fascinated by them both.

'Usopp does tend to attract bad luck; I'm surprised his legs weren't bleeding from running in that spiky codpiece' Zoro winced at the mental image to which Robin responded with another laugh. 'It would appear that we're very interesting to watch' Robin added which prompted Zoro to look across the room once more only to observe Lucci's disapproving eyes boring into his own. Kaku took the opportunity to wave again; at least he looked somewhat cheerful. Zoro didn't know why anyone hung out with Lucci; he was such a depressing grump still, he had no idea why they were being watch so intently, it wasn't like they were going anywhere.

'Weird' was all Zoro said in response but thought that whatever it was they wanted to say to them must be more important then he initially thought. Stuart their waiter came back over with Zoro's new drink instead of the far cuter blonde from earlier, the huge glass was already emptied about a quarter of the way down by the time Robin had asked him if she could get some water. They were coming to the end of their meals and both could see that some kind of event or entertainment was going to start soon. Staff members were setting up strange plastic props on the blue pitch while a tech guy was fiddling about with wiring around the gymnastic DJ booth.

'Looks like the games will start soon' Robin provided, 'shall we take part Mr. Swordsman?'

Zoro looked back at Robin as if she had just somehow transformed into Luffy. 'You're joking right?' he replied harshly although he hadn't meant to.

'I've heard the prizes given to the winners of the Foxy Games can be rather grand and luxurious, past prizes include cruises and new cars, I certainly wouldn't mind winning' Robin calmly replied back.

'Whoa, really? I hadn't heard that, only that the games were completely stupid and pointless, I didn't know you got prizes' Zoro asked in slight astonishment and curiosity 'those reviews I read must be written by the losers but I'm not one to lose so easily' Zoro smirked cockily. Robin looked directly back at Zoro holding her usual mysterious smile. Zoro interpreted it as _I want to win so you are taking part_.

'Indeed' Robin replied even more mysteriously, Zoro had to wonder what the hell she was planning; again he never really knew where he stood with Robin at times like this. Stuart was back again to plonk down the ordered water and took away some of the empty dishes. Zoro still had a few fries left but it looked like Robin was done. She sipped the last of her cocktail and sat back almost like she was sinking into the world's deepest and most comfortable chair a strange feat considering the bench was hard wood and the provided cushion was on the thin side. She looked like she was experiencing the lap of luxury however.

Zoro chomped down the last of his fries and started to guzzle down more drink when he heard something that almost made him choke. That voice, that annoying voice and the spewing of overly affectionate endearments towards any and all woman can only belong to one incredibly irritating bastard. Zoro turned his head towards the pitch as did a very surprised Robin to see a bowing suit clad Sanji right next to their table.

'What the hell are you doing here?' Zoro deadpanned before observing that Sanji was actually with someone. A short girl in a long frilly red dress with pink hair cascading down to her hips and a strange lacy black bonnet was tied around her doll like face. She had some seriously wide eyes that were staring at him intensely; it was freaking him out slightly.

'Shut it arsehole! Ah the beautiful Robin, I came here directly after I finished work so I could accompany you this evening' Sanji addressed them both simultaneously.

'Oh' Robin replied flatly 'You didn't need to do that Mr. Cook' Robin then also looked across to the woman accompanying Sanji 'Hello Ms. Perona, it has been a while since I last saw you'.

'Wahh, I bumped into the mesmerising Perona when I arrived' Sanji interrupted just as Perona was about to say something. He struck a dramatic pose of pretend fatigue or distress or something resting the back of his right hand on his forehead. 'She was made to carry her own shopping bags and I couldn't just ignore such a situation so I offered to take them to her car for her'. Sanji lowered his hand and interrupted Perona once more as it looked like she was about to speak again 'she then offered her wonderful company to me when I mentioned that I would be meeting you both here' Sanji eventually finished by bowing to kiss one of Perona's hands.

'Don't touch me' Perona said in a cutesy disgusted tone while removing her hand from Sanji's grasp. Zoro couldn't help but snort and then laughed openly at the chef as he remained stunned to the spot. Robin merely just observed the hopeless situation.

'Hello Robin' Perona eventually replied to her 'It has indeed been several months' she said almost robotically. She turned to look at Zoro to observe his handsome grin 'hello Zoro' she said apprehensively. Zoro turned away from the humiliated cook to look at her, he didn't really know Perona but knew she hung around the Moria weirdoes; he didn't think they had ever spoken to each other before though.

'Err, hey Perona' he said a little blankly 'I guess you met Usopp yesterday as well, huh?' Zoro didn't really know what else to say to her, her eyes were so wide it was distracting.

Perona seemed to pause for several seconds without blinking before she answered 'Oh, the long nose, yes he came round. Absalom gave him some nice clothes' she explained. Zoro raised a sceptical eyebrow to that statement but said nothing. 'Did you like the cupcake I gave you?' she continued. Zoro could only give a blank stare to that question as he certainly didn't see any trace of any cupcakes when he got back to HQ yesterday. All that meant, however, was that Luffy had probably demolished them all within seconds of their arrival to the building. 'Oh yeah, it was really nice, thank you' Zoro tried to say sincerely, Perona looked ecstatically happy so she bought it at least, Zoro turned to Robin for hints on anything he needed to know, however, she was looking towards the cook with a displeased expression, Zoro followed her gaze to see a very sheepish looking dart brow.

'Sanji' Robin's sharp tone cut across their small group, anyone who knew Robin well could tell that that was the tone used when she was angry. Sanji visibly flinched, from a combination of the voice, his real name being used and angry body language being directed towards him.

'Yes Robin my sweet' Sanji tried to attentively flatter but he was cut off before he could continue into his usual fawning.

'We are working this evening, what on Earth were you thinking when you decided to come here without informing one of us first?' She then made a point of looking towards Perona and then back at Sanji silently admonishing him for also bringing an outsider with him as well. Sanji started fiddling with his curtain of hair while he thought about how best to apologise to Robin. Unfortunately she wasn't the kind of woman who could be bought off with kind gesture or meaningless gift.

'I am very sorry Robin; I guess I wasn't really thinking. I just wanted to join you for a drink but you are right I should have let you know my plans. Perona and I can leave and you and the Marimo can continue your evening' Sanji said seriously and apologetically, no frilly gestures or over the top proclamations of adoration. It was actually quite uncomfortable to watch the cook grovel seriously Zoro thought. At least when he was gushing and doing his wiggle dance Zoro could just punch him and tell him where to go. He'd like to think the rare moments when Sanji is serious to a woman he would learn some lessons on how to behave reasonable around them but he knew deep down that Sanji was a lost cause. Robin at least had lost her deep frown and was just looking at him again like the idiot that he is.

Before any of the Straw Hats could decide what to do Perona took this opportunity to whine 'what!? You're not sending me away. I want to have a drink with you guys. Sanji said I could otherwise I would never had endured his company for the last ten minutes'. Again the cook froze solid to her words like he'd just stared into the eyes of medusa. Zoro would have laughed if it wasn't for the fact that Perona had decided to half sit on his lap. He scooted across the bench seat from his place in the middle to give her room to sit next to him rather than on him. For some reason she was intently staring at him while pouting, he now understood why the Moria's took her under their wing, she was just as weird as the rest of them but otherwise seemed harmless, well unless you happened to be the crap cook. Zoro snorted at the thought which made Perona's doll like face light up as well.

Robin. Meanwhile, was looking to Sanji again like she was disappointed with what he had done but had accepted it. Her eyes flickered while Sanji was just standing by their table not really knowing what to do anymore.

'Oh great' Robin sighed in exasperation 'now Lucci and Kaku are both coming over'.

Everyone turned to watch their approach. Lucci looked annoyed, as usual, and approached sticking his nose in the air. Kaku just looked confused, while carrying a small case. He was in his usual jeans, baseball jacket and cap covering his short ginger hair, his strange square shaped long nose was pointing slightly downwards. Together they looked liked such a dodgy combination like a duke with a street urchin. As they walked across the blue pitch an electronic board suddenly lit up above their heads over the boxing ring / bar. It showed the Foxy logo while some bluesy jazz music started playing; the games were obviously starting soon as well.

Sanji moved to stand beside where Robin was sat so Lucci and Kaku came to a stop next to him and where Perona was sat. 'Quite the gathering you have over here' came Lucci's deep bored voice but the undertone of irritation could still be detected.

'Some friends have joined us unexpectantly' Robin brushed off. Lucci frowned; Kaku meanwhile appeared to be having a staring contest with Perona.

'Isn't _that_ one of your crew members?' Lucci asked arrogantly gesturing towards Sanji.

'You know I am arsehole!' Sanji spat 'we've unfortunately met your sour face on several occasions, I'm sure you also haven't forgotten the _pleasant_ times we've shared' Sanji ended sarcastically. Zoro almost laughed but put on his usual stoic facade, the shit cook could on occasion be quite funny.

Lucci just frowned further without responding to that 'isn't she one of Moria's?' he asked pointing at his side where Perona sat without even looking at her. Everyone besides Lucci turned to look at Perona who seemed to have concluded something. Her previously slightly scrunched eyebrows relaxed and then rose suddenly.

'I remember now' she said pointing at Kaku 'you came to one of our tea parties and ended up flashing Cindry so we tied you to a chair and gagged you in the storage room' Perona said quite happily, like there was nothing wrong with that sentence.

Everyone then turned to look at Kaku including Lucci with a raised eyebrow. Kaku looked very uncomfortable and blushed slightly at being so abruptly ousted as a potential pervert in front of so many people. He coughed slightly while scratching the back of his neck 'err, I was pretty drunk' Kaku said reluctantly. Lucci just looked murderous after that.

'Are we still going to have a discussion or should we cancel so you can enjoy the visiting circus?' Lucci scowled towards Robin, who he judged as the most mature person within the immediate area. Before Robin could reply, however, Sanji got in there first.

'How about you don't talk to us like shit before we decide anything?'

'What is it you want Lucci? I trust everyone here, including Perona not to discuss anything potentially sensitive' Robin calmly addressed after Sanji's outburst. Although she had to agree to some of the things he was saying, his quick mouth, which could often wind people up, was exactly why she wanted Zoro for this meeting.

Before Lucci could continue he was disrupted for the second time, this time by a loud and obnoxious voice through speakers situated around the whole restaurant.

'Ladieeeeeees and gentlemeeeeeen, its 10 o'clock in the evening and that can mean only one thing!' A few cheers could be heard from the break in sentence, the groups attention was diverted to a man with a huge beer gut and tall sticking up hair standing in the middle of the blue pitch. 'It's the two. Hundredth. And. Seventy. Fifth. Spectacular Foxy Games!' The man shouted excitedly which prompted claps, cheers and hooting from the diners. Everyone at Robin's and Zoro's table remained silent watching the strange man while fake fireworks were exploding across the huge electronic board with a flashing 275 behind him.

'To mark this momentous and special edition of the Foxy Games, we have got some a-maz-ing prizes up for grabs, including!' The man paused for dramatic effect with his arms stretched out wide. Much of the now audience oohed in anticipation.

'4th prize is §2,000 berries'

'3rd prize is a state of the art home entertainment system'

'2nd prize is a holiday for 2 weeks in Alabasta for 4 people'

'And'

'1st prize is a brand new 458 Italia Ferrari!' The man chanted at the end causing and cacophony of screaming and cheering from the diners.

'How on Earth does this one restaurant manage to afford all this?' Zoro questioned out of nowhere. Surprisingly it was Lucci who answered in a fairly civil tone for once.

'You have to pay §100 beri to enter, each. The screen turns into a scoreboard' he continued while pointing towards the electronic board 'the customers who don't take part can gamble on the competitors'. He turned back to face everyone, who seemed interested 'admittedly they don't normally give away a new sports car but it must be because it's a somewhat significant games number, anyway, this place makes a pretty penny I can assure you'.

The speakers took over again 'those of you who are competing this evening have got 15 minutes to sign up at the pommel horse with the Foxy crew. Entry is §100 beri each but we can only allow 50 people to compete each games so don't delay!' the man explained. 'You have got 15 minutes, starting from now!' The man waddled off to the side where the gym equipment / entertainment booth was situated. People were already scrambling over one another quickly to sign up.

'If you'll excuse me' Lucci said suavely once again 'I think I'll be getting myself a new Ferrari this evening. There is a certain something in this case' Lucci gestured to the case that Kaku had kept a firm hold of 'that requires some explanation'.

'Hey, wait Lucci,' Kaku broke in just before Lucci was about to walk off 'I'm going to compete as well' he said with a confident grin. Lucci just raised an eyebrow but didn't complain.

'Perhaps you should compete as well Mr. Swordsman, Mr. Cook' Robin suggested 'A holiday would be very nice'. Zoro took the hint and started manoeuvring himself out of the bench seat.

'Are you coming shit brows?' Zoro addressed Sanji.

'Fuck you, Marimo! I'll kick your shitty arse!' Sanji snapped back making Zoro shrug with a bored look.

'Why do you call him shit brows?' Came the overly sweet voice of the delicate looking Perona, Zoro forgot to hold back on the insults in front of her. Robin was used to it so he knew she wouldn't mind and he just didn't care about Lucci and Kaku.

'Oh, sorry, it's just because he has crap eyebrows' Zoro offered as an explanation which was in fact equally just as insulting.

'My eyebrows are fine, seaweed head! Or shall we ask who the bigger freak here is?' Sanji started ranting but Perona had followed Zoro's explanation and was staring explicitly at the chef's eyebrows making Sanji feel very self conscious.

'They're maybe the prettiest eyebrows I've ever seen' Perona added after some time in a monotone, which didn't really sound genuine, Sanji blushed all the same. His eyebrows were a touchy subject for him.

'Well' Kaku broke in the strange conversation 'would you mind keeping hold of this for us Robin?' he gestured to the case in his hands 'it's quite important'.

'Of course' she said taking the case from him and placing it next to her 'good luck everyone' she said encouragingly 'especially Sanji and Zoro' she added just as they all started walking off. The two men turned back to look at her a little unnerved by being addressed equally by their real names. They looked at each other understanding the unstated threat from her telling them they had to win at least something.

After the four men had walked off, Robin turned to Perona who appeared to be watching Zoro with a strange intensity. It would seem that she still harboured a slight infatuation with the swordsman, which unfortunately for her the swordsman knew absolutely nothing about it. He was also completely inept at picking up on such feelings as well. Suddenly she turned and stared directly at Robin.

'I'm going to compete as well' she stated.

Robin was now left on her own in the noisy restaurant with a case and no answered questions. She caught a passing waiter and ordered another cocktail, and a betting slip. Sighing she relaxed, sat back and prepared for the unfolding show.


	5. Chariots of Fire

Well readers, not only did this chapter take ages to write after a series of events preventing it's creation (I had no word for 2 months until I bought a shiny new copy, I went on holiday, was away for Christmas and generally have just been a busy bee) but once I got around to finishing the whole chapter, it was an absolute whopper in length! So this is chapter 5 part 1.

Enjoy and please comment if you will.

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><p>A number of hot lights were glaring down on the five lines of contestants dressed in cheap grey cotton gym vests and shorts provided by the establishment. Unfortunately the same courtesy wasn't stretched to footwear as people were clad in anything from huge platform boots to pointy brogues and tatty trainers. Chariots of Fire was currently blaring out of the speakers to create an inspirational effect around the large space of the restaurant come theatre come gambolling establishment. The competitors couldn't currently see the edge of the room but they could hear the excited rumble of the diners echoing off the tall roof.<p>

An odd shaped man who was all roundness in his gut but in comparison had fairly spindly arms and legs was prancing about as some form of entertainment for the crowd. His mid-length black hair was standing vertically upwards on each side of his head split by a centre parting. He had an odd pointy long nose although Usopp and Kaku would win in length overall. He sported worse eyebrows then a certain curly cook as he had shaved several triangles into what would have otherwise been thick black caterpillars. He wore hideous spandex styled yellow trousers with a random red cape. Despite his unconventional looks he was stirring up the diners come spectators successfully.

The music was fading out and the round man stopped his prancing which was him simply skipping up to different tables in the dining sections and grinning at people. He came to a stop in the middle of the blue pitch area working his way round bits of equipment which had been laid out in last half an hour since people were told to sign up. Clearly out of breath he breathed deeply into the microphone addressing the room.

'Ahoo' he begun 'ladies and gentleman, I'm a little out of breath after all of that'. This prompted much laughter from the man and the diners although some clearly weren't all that enthusiastic about his performance.

'It's me, your electrifying host Fooooooxxxxxxy!' he screamed 'It is time to start the games' he paused to catch some more breath 'we have got our 50 contestants and they are quite the handsome bunch don't you think?' Many cheers and a few boos were heard from this question.

'If you observe the Foxy scoreboard you will see our contestant's names, although I think there could be a few aliases in there hey Frog Man and The Spoon?' Foxy laughed while a man on the front row struck a pose and another in the fourth row screamed 'yeah!'

'You will notice that our contestants each have a number pinned onto their shirts, the numbers on the board correspond with the numbers the contestants display.' He paused for some more breath 'if you fancy the look of any of tonight's contestants you can bet on who you think the winner will be! Odds will change as the games progress and bets are open until just before the final round. You will notice that everyone is currently on a level playing field of 25 to 1 so your best chance of a big win is now! You can place your bets to win or bet each way where you will win for guessing any of the top four finishers. All of our Foxy staff will accept your bets so why don't you have a go? You could be winners this evening as well!' The man paused again to allow more cheers.

'Now it's almost time for our first game, which will immediately whittle our 50 contestants down to just 15!' Foxy paused yet again for dramatic effect allowing a few ooh's to be heard. 'You will have noticed that some equipment has been laid out across the central pitch.' Foxy explained as he walked up to the back of the room where the contestants were lined and the game began. 'The contestants must run to the basket balls' Foxy demonstrated this by running up at one of ten balls placed about 5 meters from the start line and picking it up ' then the contestants must dribble the ball up to the hula hoop' again this was demonstrated slowly and quite poorly. A plastic hoop was placed about another 10 meters up the pitch. 'You will then need to spin the hoop around your waist ten times, oh and you will be monitored' Foxy enforced with a finger wagging in the air. Unsurprisingly he didn't demonstrate this bit of equipment nor the next probably due to his portly mid section. 'When completed you must cross under the net and then move onto the skipping rope.' A camouflage net spanned about another 15 meters down the course without any kind of padding placed underneath, some ropes were laid out just after it. 'Skip the rope twenty times, again you WILL be monitored then run for the seesaw' Foxy ran up to a single large seesaw which had a span wide enough for only one person at a time. He actually demonstrated how it worked by waddling up the plank until the weight shifted to the other side of the central pivotal point. Once he's waddled off the thing it swung back to its original place. 'Then get to the finish line as quickly as possible!' Foxy finished by walking to the bottom of the pitch, the whole thing was maybe 50 metres long and he still appeared to be out of breath and sweating slightly.

'We have our Foxy staff to monitor that no cheating will go on. So I think it's about time we got these games started!' Foxy again almost screamed, raising his voice towards the end. He then waddled over to the gym/DJ booth and wiped down his sweaty face on a small towel while the crowd started bustling about, trying to lay bets or just whooping with excitement. Robin had been carefully observing all of the contestants during Foxy's introduction and now was placing bets against a winner and a second to fourth place fully confident that she would definitely get a return on her money.

After a few minutes had passed in order for Foxy's to start raking in the money said owner approached the start line holding a starter pistol. There wasn't anyone Robin knew in the first race, Lucci was in the second with Kaku, Sanji was in the fourth and Zoro and Perona were in the last line or fifth race. Sanji was happily flirting away with a petit brunette to his left, Zoro look bored, Perona was openly staring at him, Lucci looked annoyed but focused and Kaku was smiling well naturedly. Robin chuckled to herself at the obvious personality traits, as she relaxed more into her seat keeping the mystery case next to her hip.

'Contestants are you ready?' was suddenly blurted by Foxy next the contestants on the first race, a few mumbles and a couple of "yeah's" were his rather lacklustre response. 'Now remember only the first three to finish each race will progress into the next round' he went on undeterred 'race number one, get ready, get set', _"bang"_ went the starter gun which was unexpectantly very loud making several contestants and diners jump as it continued to echo off the high ceiling. The first race was on the way with a tall thin man, possibly in his late thirties, named Geoff making a clear headway over the rest of his race, his long legs and bendy frame a clear advantage. After a few giggles from several contestants not able to hula hoop or getting caught under the camouflage net the race was soon won by Geoff, a young bare foot blonde woman coming in second and the man calling himself The Spoon just finishing third to a mass of cheers. The rest of the contestants who knew their games experience was already over, sluggishly walked to collect their belongings from the DJ Booth before disappearing back into the restaurant seating as if they were never contenders in the first place. The gleeful winners of the first race were taken to the side by Foxy staff while the obstacles were placed back in their original positions.

Lucci stepped forward confidently to the start line for the next race, his grey socks pulled up mid calf and his shoes shining. Kaku in contrast was bouncing on the balls of his feet looking playful but determined. The second race was soon on the way with the gun less startling but still deafening. Lucci and Kaku were neck and neck the whole way leaving the rest of the field a fair bit behind. The skipping rope, however, gave Kaku a slight advantage in grip from his trainers meaning he was on his way towards the seesaw seconds before Lucci. They both climbed the obstacle together, Kaku having to walk much higher until Lucci met the pivotal point at which the sides tipped, the plank crashed to the floor with a fair bit of force making Kaku have to crouch to correct his balance. He launched himself forward as soon as he could with Lucci right on his heels to cross the finish millimetres before him. Kaku jumped in joy but soon stopped when he observed the thunderous look on Lucci's face directed right at him. The then sombre celebration from Kaku and Lucci going into the next round was joined a young boy, who looked no older than 14 called Sam. He uncomfortably joined the duo at the side then quickly walked towards the winners from the first race as soon as he could.

The third race had red haired sisters coming in first and second with a large built bald man looking incredibly out of breath grabbing the last qualifying spot. The fourth race was won by "Frog Man" an athletic looking guy who was probably in his early twenties. An equally athletic looking young woman with long black pigtails finished second. Sanji ended up finishing fourth because he decided to help the cute brunette get through the race although he soon abandoned her about halfway across the camouflage net when he noticed that he wouldn't qualify for the next round if he stuck with her. He waited until she finally finished in 7th place to overly apologise for abandoning her but she just walked off looking very annoyed, leaving Sanji without someone to flirt with until the next victim could be found and no place in the next game. Luck, however, seemed to strike when the man who came third called Fabio was disqualified for only performing 17 skips on the skipping rope making him go out and Sanji to remain in. Sanji then proceeded to produce many deep apologetic bows in Robin's direction for his stupidity.

Zoro approached the start line scratching his armpit and yawning while Perona had her hands on her hips looking determined even though she was the shortest and skinniest in line even with knee high black leather platform boots on, which everyone else assumed would be a hindrance rather than a help. She'd tied her wig back into a single thick braid going down her back and put on a thick black hair band to replace the lacy bonnet from before. Out of all of the races so far, this group looked by far the most dishevelled having contestants from all shapes and sizes. The gun sounded once again and Perona shot off performing all of the tasks quickly and with precision leaving a good proportion of the audience to be startled, obviously assuming she hadn't stood much of a chance. Zoro leisurely performed all of the tasks putting no great effort into anything and more or less strolled to the finish line coming second to the speedy and overly joyous Perona who took the opportunity to leap on him as soon as he walked over the finish line. Although Zoro was obviously confused and didn't really know what to do with the woman he soon decided to remove her from his person and stroll over to the other winners. Perona undeterred stuck to his side smiling up at him. The third place winner was an elderly man who was obviously extremely pleased to have made it to the next game as was an extremely loud circle of friends and family of his in the cycling seating.

The central pitch was soon a hive of activity, all of the equipment they had just used was being taken away while something else was coming out to replace it, for the next challenge. While this was happening all of the remaining contestants were lead to the top of the pitch again in a single line where a newly changed Foxy was waiting for them. He now wore a silver ensemble, the shirt having a huge oversized collar sticking up and strangely a large black utility belt was stretched around his belly.

'Ladies and gentlemen we have got our first round winners' Foxy bellowed to cheers once more and a few whistles. 'If you have a look at our Foxy scoreboard you will see that the contestants who didn't make it through to the next game have been removed awww' Foxy almost seemed to be laughing, 'more importantly you will notice that our winners have a few different betting odds against them based on the results from the first game. But if you're unsure who you think the champion will be let's have a little chat with our remaining contestants before you place your bets'.

Sanji, who was towards the end of the line couldn't help but frown at the amount of effort put into making sure the audience parted with their cash to bet on him and the others, it just seemed somehow quite sleazy. Sanji frowned further when he discovered that he had the most unlikely to win odds, which had remained at 25 to 1, Zoro had jumped to 6 to 1 while Lucci and Kaku had somehow become favourites to win at 3 to1.

Foxy started making his way down the line asking the same vague first question of "tell us something about yourself" before taking it from there and soon getting laughs and cheers from the diners once more. Lucci was waiting for him 4th in line having put himself ahead of Kaku. He looked as stern as ever and wouldn't crack a smile at any of Foxy's jibes or jokes which soon had the vast majority of the audience booing at him for being so uncooperative. Lucci remained unimpressed and Foxy soon got the hint and moved on to talk to Kaku. Kaku, by contrast, was very playful, claiming that he was a prize winning baker and cake decorator and made up all kinds of tales to Foxy's questions. He was soon getting huge cheers of approval before Foxy moved on again to the young boy Sam who had also been in their race. Sanji, Perona and Zoro were amongst the last four contestants to get interviewed in which time they watched as 15 mini round trampolines were being set in a circle on top of gym mats and a long orange padded bar was getting set up in the centre of the blue pitch.

By the time Foxy approached Sanji, rather than asking his usual first question, which Sanji had been preparing for, to brag that he was a well respected chef; he was instead confronted with pity. 'Well Sanji' Foxy began as if this was the sad section of the show 'you are actually very lucky to be competing still aren't you' before waiting for a reply he continued 'you actually finished in fourth place, you didn't have the best of starts did you? But you managed to get through because a contestant was cheating'. Foxy then turned out to the audience and was hyped once more when he said 'and we can't have that in the Foxy Games!' which people cheered about 'how are you feeling right now?' Foxy asked instead before shoving the microphone he was carrying almost into Sanji's nose. Sanji giving Foxy a pretty good indication that he was now thoroughly annoyed managed to spit out between his clenched jaw 'I am very grateful for the opportunity' and that was it, Foxy was moving on to Perona making Sanji surprised then quickly even more livid. He mentally vowed to himself that he would definitely win the next game at all costs.

The interview with Perona, however, was perhaps the strangest of the lot as rather than answering anything about herself she had proceeded to tell Foxy in her frank and detailed manor just how unfunny she thought he was and that his eyebrows were his worst feature although his hair was also pretty horrible. Foxy who was actually flabbergasted because she had not only insulted him but somehow managed to get the audience howling in laughter at her comments was only slightly consoled when she told him that silver suited his complexion well, dejectedly he moved on to Zoro.

Zoro just watched the strange object that was Foxy approach with an eyebrow raised over his good eye. All enthusiasm seemed to have fled him after his encounter with Perona, which stumped Zoro a bit on what to do next. He didn't know what he was going to talk about anyway; he wasn't a massively social person after all, that was the crap cooks job.

'So we meet the green haired man with one eye' Foxy said monotonal even though this was ordinarily a very unique characteristic to have. Zoro didn't respond. 'Tell us something about yourself' Foxy continued as if he could no longer be bothered and flopped the microphone near Zoro's mouths general direction while he looked at the floor.

'Erm, well' Zoro paused then going with what most of the others before him had said replied 'I work in a dojo teaching martial arts to kids'.

'Oh, that's nice' Foxy replied with zero sincerity in his tone 'what kind of things do you do?'

Zoro was struck with an idea, although this normally went against how he normally acted around people, with perhaps the acceptation of Luffy and Chopper, he decided he would cheer this guy up so the atmosphere would stop being so damned awkward.

'Well, I'll teach you some moves' Zoro said smiling at the man then led him forward slightly then lined up next to him. Foxy's interest did exactly what he hoped, piqued and got his mind off of Perona's comments. Zoro took him through a simple and quick karate move which moved forward balancing on each leg then ended with a high kick. Foxy was smiling and laughing along with the audience whooping and clapping by the time he had performed the move. Foxy thanked Zoro before cheerfully interviewing the last remaining contestant, a man called Jim who was 71 years of age; he got many claps and cheers as the crowd showed their support.

Foxy managed to end the interviews at the exact same time that all of the equipment had been set up for the next game. Along with the mini trampolines in a circle and the foam padded orange bar in the middle, four large tubs were situated outside of the circle in corners full of inflatable toys, balls and stuffed bears.

'Ladies and gentleman' Foxy calmly declared for once, 'please finish up any last minute bets on your favourites now as I explain the next game' he walked up to the orange pole with his arm stretched wide. 'Now this next game will whittle our 15 remaining contestants down to just 8 and here is just how that will happen' Foxy paused to manoeuvre under the pole while a murmur of chatter was filling up the room. 'You will have noticed that we have 15 single trampolines set out in a circle, each contestant will take one trampoline. The central orange pole here will spin around, slowly at first but this pole will not only increase in speed but also in height as the game continues. Our contestants must jump over the pole and land back on their trampolines to remain in the game. Those who fail a jump or don't land back and remain on their trampoline are out, only the last remaining 8 contestants will progress to the next game, however, we have a special Foxy prize for the last man or woman standing!' Foxy raised his voice in dramatic fashion; the diners were getting revved up again. 'This is a game that tests balance and concentration but we like to throw in an extra challenge at the Foxy Games, oh yes' Foxy walked to one of the tubs filled with toys and balls and picked up an inflatable shark. 'Our Foxy crew will be trying to distract and disrupt our contestants by throwing in a few projectiles.' Foxy laughed a little manically while he waved the inflatable shark in all directions just in case anyone in the dining sections couldn't see the toy which was the same size as their host. He placed it back in the tub and turned back to the line of remaining contestants. 'Geoff if you could lead the way, contestants please take up your trampolines!' Foxy ended again dramatically with his arms raised.

Geoff the lanky winner from race one lead out the line and took up the trampoline nearest to him looking unsure which one he was supposed to take. The line continued around with people taking up the trampolines in order of where they were in the line. Sanji, Perona and Zoro all ended up next to each other opposite Lucci and Kaku. Kaku gave them a thumbs up, Lucci was looking to the side and paying no one else any attention. Sanji was testing the trampolines bounce while Perona was looking at her platform boots in contemplation. Zoro just looked at Kaku with a confused look on his face and his arms crossed over his chest. The point of the pole was currently situated between the red haired sisters from race three, both looked nervous as they muttered about which way the pole was going to spin, which hadn't been explained. The pole currently came up to about mid calf on them while on the trampolines. Foxy during this time had moved over again to the gym DJ booth and was looking ever so slightly exhausted. Two Foxy staff members had been stationed at each soft toy bins getting ready to hurl the contents at the contestants. Each bin was manned by staff in the uniforms from each of the dining sections, Zoro, Sanji and Perona were nearest to the staff in the equestrian uniform, which was Sanji felt was advantageous as they wouldn't have as much freedom of movement compared to the other staff uniforms, meaning they probably couldn't hurls things quite as far. That was the theory anyway.

Foxy after collecting himself after a few minutes started walking out with his arms posed in the air once again, this somehow managed to raise the excitement in the room although the majority of the contestants were feeling anxious. However, without so many dramatics for this game he put the microphone to his mouth and addressed the contestants only.

'Contestants are you ready?' Foxy then laughed as only a couple of the 15 actually yelled yes. 'Let the game begin!' Foxy blared undeterred.

Everyone's focus turned to the orange pole which started to turn slowly clockwise. The red haired sister on the left of the pole suddenly jerked into action jumping on the trampoline a little too enthusiastically, clearing the bar but almost bouncing off the trampoline on her landing. After just managing to keep her balance she was awarded with a foam baton smacking her square in the jaw. The crowd went berserk.

Sanji, although slightly traumatised by witnessing a woman being hit by foam objects was still absolutely determined to be crowned victorious in this game. As such he channelled out the crowd and the contestants he wasn't interested in, the male contestants. If there was one thing Sanji prided himself on it was his speed and balance. He fought with his legs; they were his biggest physical strength so he was quietly confident in beating the rest of the field.

The pole approached picking up speed; everyone had so far successfully cleared the bar with only a few wobbles on landing. The Foxy crew were poised to pelt toys at whoever had the pole approaching. Sanji prepared for his jump and launched just as the pole approached his trampoline. He cleared it, started to descend when suddenly a huge teddy bear hit directly into the back of his head prompting his usually immaculate floppy hair to fly forward around his eyes. He couldn't see. He couldn't see his landing. He felt the dip of the trampoline through his legs before he could see it. He absorbed the shock into his frame and shook his head to clear his vision only to get a blue ball smacking his head backwards from a direct hit to his forehead. Amazingly he had landed perfectly in the centre of his mini trampoline, no harm done but he now acknowledged that this game was a little trickier then he originally gave it credit for.

Sanji eventually turned behind him to see that both Perona, still in her platform boots and Zoro, who looked as stoic and bored as ever had both cleared the bar, seemingly without any problems. Sanji mentally sighed at the unfairness of it all and focussed forward to keep his mind on the game; he vowed he would not get distracted and win the game. He started a mental mantra of 'focus to win' and ignored the room once more.

Foxy during this time was giving commentary like the game was a horse racing event. The first person to be knocked out was "The Spoon" who landed badly thanks to an inflatable turtle falling on his trampoline. It looked like he might have actually twisted his ankle as he limped out of the circle but the game continued and the crowd continued to cheer. Jim the 71 year old and the bald guy from race 3 soon followed as they struggled to keep up the pace.

It was when the pole started to rise in height and speed when people really started having a hard time. Unsurprisingly the slightly shorter contestants seemed to be having the most trouble with this. Everyone was much more focused and the projectiles were running low so it was coming down to a test of skill alone.

Geoff from race one bounced off backwards as he couldn't balance on the trampoline after his jump, this prompted the blonde woman behind him to lose focus, failing to jump in time the pole swung into her knees, which sent her stumbling backwards in a way that had to have hurt. Unfazed Lucci jumped without any problems but Kaku was wobbling all over the place. Young Sam and the red head sisters still managed to clear the bar whilst Frog Man started to show off by doing star jumps over it. The dark pigtailed girl in front of Sanji failed to completely clear her jump clipping her foot, she flew forward and face planted in to the gym mat. Sanji had to strive against every single natural instinct he possessed not to go to her side and check if she was alright. He jumped. He started crying a little bit but his resolve to win would not be so easily shattered if Robin depended on him.

The majority of the contestants were now aware that only one more person needed to get knocked out before they were all into the next round, mostly thanks to Foxy's screaming about the fact through his microphone. New determination took over everyone. After two clear spins and to the surprise of a lot of people, despite all the wobbling, Kaku failed to land back on his trampoline after his jump. Although the crew members who knew him a little better were surprised with even Lucci looking behind him after hearing the announcement from Foxy, no one was more stunned then Kaku himself. He stood stock still until he acknowledged that the pole was spinning back around to him again and then reluctantly walked out of the circle knowing his games were over.

Perona took this opportunity to jump out of the game now that she knew she was through, she then told Zoro to do the same. Zoro, who found the game quite annoying anyway figured that he might as well and then walked out to the side. Crossing his arms against his chest, he turned to watch Lucci and Sanji battle it out.

Kaku after getting his belongings went to sit with Robin rather then returning to his table in the equestrian zone. She just smiled as always at him and gave the reassuring words of 'not your game it would seem' before returning her full attention to the mats. Kaku just sighed and ordered a huge coke from the nearest passing waiter while he tried his hardest not to sulk.

After the majority of the remaining contestants had either bowed out or been knocked out the only remaining contestant's were Frog man, Sanji and Lucci. The pole had risen to roughly mid thigh height on Sanji and had sped up considerably. Frog Man had at least started jumping seriously again and Lucci was so focused that he looked like the angriest man in the world. Foxy had run out of things to say and most of the room were mesmerised by the displayed athleticism. Sanji knew he had some strong competition with Lucci, who also fought strongly with his legs and whoever the Frog Man guy was; he was clearly a threat too.

With five clear rounds done by the three of them, Frog Man decided to jump out of the game when the pole was almost at his hip. Knowing he had some good competition he decided to conserve a bit of energy for the next game rather than win this one, which didn't matter as much. As soon as Sanji saw him step out he could feel a bit of pressure release from his frame, which he didn't before realise he was holding. It was just him and Lucci now and he could tell that Lucci was getting irritated and stiffer, seeing him clenching his jaw from the corner of his eye.

It took six more clear rounds and pole to be belly button height before Lucci over angled his jump to such an extent that he missed his landing. He was so furious at this point that he screamed out all of his frustration as soon as he landed and marched up to Foxy with balled fists and fierce eyes. Foxy who was more than a little startled along with several members of the audience held up his arms to protect his face, fully expecting to get punched but Lucci instead just walked past him heaving with anger and cursing repeatedly. Robin noticed Kaku sliding down in his seat at Lucci's outburst trying to make himself seem smaller, if not invisible. She couldn't really blame him; she certainly wouldn't want Lucci back over near her in his current mood either.

The pole, having stopped once Lucci got knocked out, made Sanji aware that he had indeed won the game and took the opportunity to bow to the room and blow kisses to several woman he thought were particularly stunning as he became completely elated. Foxy, after getting over the shock of the Lucci storm soon waddled over to announce Sanji the winner to echoing applause. Sanji was very pleased with himself indeed.


	6. Are We All Winners or Losers?

And now for part 2. Hooray!

Please leave your comments.

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><p>The remaining eight contestants were gathered again at the top of the blue pitch after a brief break where they could refresh themselves and the Foxy staff could set up the next challenge. Sanji now had the best odds of winning the competition along with a voucher for a free meal for four on his next visit to Foxy's for winning the last game, something he had happily gloated about to Zoro and then by default Perona, who never left his side, consistently, which annoyed them both to no end. Lucci on the other hand had been given a verbal warning about his attitude by the Foxy team and was told that another violent outburst would disqualify him from any Foxy Games held within the next six months. He was currently looking grumpily into the crowd but was generally calm again. There were only two more games until the winners would be crowned and Lucci was silently determined he would be number one.<p>

The next game seemed to be the least dramatic yet; all that was set out for them were 8 empty buckets and 8 empty large plastic beakers with a float in each of them. Some plastic sheeting had been laid down with foam planks surrounding the edge to anchor it down. While Zoro stared at the equipment, it didn't take a genius to figure out that he was about to get wet. He looked across at the strange creature that was Perona, who having suspicions of her own as to what was coming up next had started shoving her long hair into a shower cap covered with a rubber duck pattern. He had no idea where she got it from but she sure as hell seemed to be capable in the most unlikely of scenarios.

Foxy was giving his usual spiel to the diners about how they should part with more of their money to bet on the contestants. While this was going on a guy who had leopard spots dyed and cut into his hair in the athletes uniform started to attach the buckets onto each contestants head with the aid of a head harness. Most looked sheepish but the red haired sisters giggled none stop, laughing at each other as well as everyone else. By contrast Perona was squeaking in misery at how ridiculous they were making her look. Big watery eyes and a sad expression were directed right at Zoro which made him immensely uncomfortable. So, much to Perona's displeasure, he grabbed Sanji and shoved him at her. Of course Sanji being Sanji immediately began to coo over her and declare how adorable she was incessantly. Zoro walked off to the side, Perona wailed.

After getting everyone lined up again Foxy was explaining how the next game worked and how this game would determine the champions of the 275th Foxy Games, in other words, how four progress to the final and a prize would be guaranteed for them. After flailing his limbs about several times in entertaining gestures, Foxy explained how the contestants had to collect as much water in their specifically assigned measuring beakers at the edge of the pitch, by filling them from what they catch in the buckets on their heads. Two foxy staff stood at the bottom corners of the sheeting equipped with a hose with a spray nozzle on the end. The contestants basically had to fight for the water so they could win. The slippy plastic sheeting wasn't going to help, nor the foam that the leopard guy was now pumping onto it but then this was all for the entertainment of the crowd.

Foxy, who thankfully had a whistle this time, declared that the contestants had 5 minutes to collect as much water as they could beginning . . . '_toooot'_. The contestants, a bit surprised, piled into the middle of the sheeting, which is where the water from the hoses was being aimed. Of course this being the Foxy games, as soon as everyone was piled on top of each other the Foxy staff started moving the direction of the water about in a rather unforgiving fast speed. Young Sam was already on his bum from having slipped and Lucci looked like a drowned rat within seconds. Sanji like the Red haired sisters started laughing at the scene and thus the chaos really begun.

Perona kept screeching in horror whenever the water hit her, which was proving very comedic to the diners. The Foxy staff noticing this let their sadistic side loom by hitting her with water more than anyone else. Perona's measuring beaker was at least 2 bars fuller then her fellow competitors after two minutes had passed.

Zoro meanwhile had started taking on the Frog Man in a complete sabotage mission. They were similar heights and had similar builds but Zoro knew that this guy needed taking down in this round; he was too strong a competition. So, a few dirty tactics came into play. When the water was moving backwards from their current position, Zoro pretended he was slipping and wedged his foot right behind Frog Man's ankle as he walked backwards following the spray. What followed was the guy falling flat on his back and spilling the contents of his bucket all over Lucci, who had moved there to collect more in his own bucket. Zoro smirked; it was two mini victories in one. Zoro went to unload his bucket before he himself ended up on the floor.

Sam couldn't stay on his feet, his shoes proving far too slippy on the foamy plastic sheet. He had so far managed to knock over, Lucci twice, the red haired sisters a few times, Sanji, Zoro and the Frog Man three times. Only Perona went unscathed but most were steering clear of the ear splitting high pitched screeching. Sam hadn't managed to get any water in his beaker after three minutes had gone so the crowd had taken to chanting his name in support and amusement.

Everyone was soaked through at this point and most were covered in foam as well. The red haired sisters were having a lot of fun and had picked up on Zoro's dirty tactics but rather than being subtle like Zoro was trying to be, they full out went barging into people to try and knock them out of the way. Poor Sam was on his arse again seconds after he had managed to stand up. Sanji got knocked over by a giggling red head, he lost his water but his heart was soaring from the contact with a woman and immediately started wiggle dancing towards her. Zoro who happened to be in a position to see all of this decided to intervene and trip up Sanji on his way making him fall flat on his face.

'Focus shit cook!' were the comforting words he was provided with.

Groaning, Sanji got up then was on Zoro in a flash. Luckily Zoro had just deposited his bucket contents in his beaker again before he was aware that a foot had been rammed into the back of his knee. He went down and looked up into triumphant blue eyes as the cook sneered down at him.

'Shitty Swordsman' was all Sanji had to say.

Zoro got up again and as Sanji started to walk back into the centre, dived on him. Sanji didn't go down but he did stumble forward with Zoro still gripping his shoulders, therefore managing to topple over Frog man again who was just in front of them. He seemed to have had a fairly full bucket which consequently was tossed over everyone else. An added bonus, Zoro thought to himself as he started to kind of wrestle with Sanji.

Sanji, who was always quick to anger anyway, retaliated by wrapping one of his legs around Zoro's hip then forcing his weight on him. Zoro flipped and started falling on his back again for the second time within half a minute but grabbed hold of Sanji's still airborne leg and dragged him down with him. Zoro landed hard on the barely cushioned floor then had to groan as Sanji then landed hard on top of him elbow first into his ribs. Their buckets clanked together as they both grunted from the impact and their heads smacking together. Sanji was completely sprawled with his face resting against Zoro's neck while he listened to the echoing laughter and cheers from the diners bouncing around the high ceiling. He was completely mortified, when he finally began to pick himself up and off of Zoro he was beet red from embarrassment. It was only when he heard a few wolf whistles, however, that he wanted to crawl in a hole and die.

Once Sanji had started crawling off the top of him Zoro started to lean up, noticing how red Sanji looked. After raising a confused eyebrow, not knowing why he was so embarrassed, he lost his patience a little at the cook for taking so long to get up. So, Zoro in all of his caring wisdom decided to shove Sanji's arm to hurry him up. What he didn't take into equation was that Sanji was using said arm to hold his weight on as he attempted to climb on his feet. Knocking it out from under him resulted in Sanji falling once more, only this time with him rear raised up on his knees in the air while his face planted right in Zoro's crotch.

Zoro, startled, went stock still, turning as white as a sheet in milliseconds; a feat for his natural tan coloured skin. Sanji went so red he took on a slight shade of purple. Perona could be heard wailing somewhere in the background in indignation. Foxy laughed continuously through the microphone but managed, through gasps for breath, to announce that there was only one minute remaining. Sanji slowly pulling his head out of the worst place he could ever possibly imagine had every muscle in his face contorted into an angry scowl as his eyes burned for blood right at Zoro.

Zoro, relieved when Sanji moved away from his crotch, which was way too uncomfortable for words, ignored the livid cook as there were more important things at the moment although he was sure that a fight would be coming as soon as available.

'Come on; hurry the hell up crap cook. We're running out of time!' Zoro gruffly pleaded.

'I will fucking kick your arse for this, you piece of shit' Sanji growled out through clenched teeth.

Zoro just grunted non-committed while he rolled from underneath Sanji when he had finally started to stand. He quickly got to his feet and saw Lucci looking at them in disgust. When Lucci noticed he'd been spotted he gave the dirtiest mocking smirk towards the two of them then turned to go fill his beaker.

'Hey cook' Zoro addressed Sanji who was starting to turn back to a more normal colour.

'What?'

'How about we take out Lucci before he gets a chance to reach his beaker'

Sanji followed Lucci with his eyes as he was carefully trying to move around people to reach his beaker in the top corner. Sanji smirked.

'On occasion Marimo, I like the way you think, although admittedly not very often' Sanji had to inject in there at the last second. 'Let's move'.

With that they split up, Zoro going round left and Sanji right, Sanji was the first to reach him and banged into Lucci's side. He didn't slip but did lose some water from his bucket.

'Thirty Seconds' Foxy boomed through the speakers.

Lucci while annoyed focused on his beaker rather than Sanji, who had gone as quickly as he'd arrived for his sabotage attempt. Seconds after Sanji's nudge he felt an impact from his other side, only this time it was more like a brick wall had slammed into him. Again Lucci somehow kept his balance but ended up sloshing out more water as he staggered to the side. When he finally got to his beaker to tip whatever contents were left he only saw the slightest trickle added to the volume already collected. Lucci vowed there and then that the Straw Hats had just topped his substantially long most hated list.

Zoro joined Sanji in the centre trying to gain some more water before time ran out. Everyone was doing the same creating a jumble of limbs and buckets. Perona stayed out to the side, trying to avoid water at all costs. Her mascara had already run down her face making her look like a scary clown while her knee high platform boots were possibly ruined by the foam. She looked absolutely miserable.

'Ten seconds' came Foxy's voice 'nine, eight'.

Everyone dashed to dump whatever they had in their buckets to their beakers. Some made it while others weren't so lucky.

'Three, two, one' Foxy blew his whistle and the diners cheered and laughed at the mess that competitors had created. The red haired sisters were still smiling while others looked worn out and bedraggled.

'Contestants, if you could stand next to your beakers' Foxy asked 'we will measure what you have collected and see who has made it to the final!' He squeaked excitedly.

Most moved across while young Sam chose to crawl to his beaker, not trusting his feet. Foxy and the leopard guy started to move around the area taking note of the water levels each person had managed to retrieve. Other Foxy staff started to clean up and already set up parts of the next game. Most people were focused on a huge whale shaped vacuum thing named Naboo that was sucking up all of the excess water and foam off the plastic sheet. It expanded and contracted constantly while making an almost sad sounding groaning noise that was oddly mesmerising.

The competitors were eventually handed towels once the bucket head gear was removed and asked to line up once again in front of the last game as Foxy staff continued to clean it up. Foxy did his usual trick of parading around the room to try and draw some kind of suspense, asking a few people who their favourites were. Eventually he came back to the competitors in a new outfit of blue and gold flares with a glittery tank top.

'Ladies and gentleman' Foxy began, 'we have the results to determine who our Foxy Champions for the 275th Foxy Games are!' A few people clapped but they wanted to know who was through as much as the competitors themselves.

'Could the following people please step forward when I call your name' Foxy paused for dramatic effect.

'Emily Tarr' the younger of the red-haired sisters stepped forward chewing her thumb but looking excited.

'Frog Man' Frog Man stepped out and posed with his hands on his hips and chest puffed.

'Sanji Black' Sanji stepped forward with a raised eyebrow, he couldn't tell if he were amongst the winners or the losers from the other two.

'And' Foxy paused even longer while everyone looked eagerly on.

'Sam Doulin' Young Sam sheepishly walked forward and everyone could guess the result but Foxy soon confirmed 'I'm afraid you haven't made it through to the Foxy Games final this time but you all have done brilliantly well and we hope to see you in future Foxy Games to come'.

A lazy round of applause started that quickly escalated to a loud and cheerful one as the losers finally made their ways off the pitch, waving, bowing or wishing other competitors well. Perona was announced as the overall winner, which seemed to stun everyone accept Perona who was more interested in trying to repair her boots and her face rather than the result. Melissa the older red haired sister was overjoyed and was jumping about waving at anybody and everybody who cared. Lucci was looking smug even though his hair was starting to frizz as big as an afro and he was still dripping while Zoro appeared to be staring into space, completely blank and unmoving.

After Sanji had dried off and was once again in his much more comfortable suit, he went to join Robin who was chatting to a chirpier Kaku. Once she noticed Sanji, she sent him a warm smile, which made him melt instantly.

'Ah Robin Chwaan~, I am so glad to be in your heavenly presence again' Sanji exclaimed with his arms held out towards her as if she were perfection itself and everyone should be looking.

'Really? But you looked pretty comfortable between Zoro's legs earlier' came a snarky reply from Kaku, who then chuckled at Sanji's face which had instantly dropped and turned to stone.

Robin giggled to herself very quietly for a moment before she told Sanji to sit next her, which of course he was thrilled to comply with. 'Well Mr. Cook, who do you think will win now?' Robin mused out loud.

'Well, that crappy Swordsman better win Robin-chwan her holiday or there will be hell to pay! Sanji replied switching between polite and fawning over Robin to angry and blunt towards Zoro.

Robin just smiled again mysteriously as she turned to the centre again where Foxy was still trying to get people to bet on the final game. 'Hmm, well I wonder about that' she says softly as everyone focused to the blue pitch where final seemed to be about to start.

'Ho, ho, ho, ladies and gentleman, it's everyone's most feared game, the gym challenge!' Foxy soon bellowed excitedly. Lucci, Zoro, Perona and Melissa were all lined up behind a series of gym equipment laid out in decent intervals. Including a mat with two separate lines marked on it, parallel bars, an exercise bike and a treadmill.

'This is the ultimate endurance test!' Foxy paused 'each remaining contestant has two minutes on each piece of equipment to gain as many points as they can.' He then as in the first round went to each piece of equipment starting with the mat.

'Here each contestant must perform as many squat thrusts as possible within the time limit. Feet must touch the front and back lines to count. Each time the feet return to the back line 1 point is granted. Feet must be together at all times, one foot at a time does not count.' One of Foxy's lackeys demonstrated how to squat thrust by bending forward on the mat until on all fours and then jumped their feet to each line, forwards and backwards in a slow speed but so everyone understood. Foxy then explained the exercise bike which was simply see how far you can cycle in 2 minutes, there was a point for each metre achieved.

'The parallel bars will test their upper body strength!' Foxy went on to the next equipment. 'Here the contestants must do push ups from the bars, they must go from a straight arm to a 90° angle at the elbow then straighten out again. The feet must not touch the floor. 1 point will be awarded for each push up achieved'. Again this was demonstrated by a another Foxy lackey while another was already running on the treadmill. 'Finally, how far can you run on the upwards incline treadmill? You will be awarded 1 point for every metre. There are some big points on offer here, champions..' Foxy turned to the last remaining four 'take your places for your final challenge'.

The crowd of diners were already murmuring or cheering for their favourites as each person was lead to a different piece of equipment, Melissa the mat, Zoro the bike, Perona the bars and Lucci the treadmill. Each task was monitored by Foxy staff armed with a clipboard and pen although the ones assigned to the bike and treadmill were also poised to start the timers on the machines. Foxy was armed with a stop watch and whistle and actually seemed to be quite serious for once. The contestants were getting into focus and the diners quieted down automatically knowing that they needed to do so.

Foxy's shrill whistle went and the diner crowd started roaring loudly for their favourites. Zoro heard his name a few times ring through the chaos but he was generally focussed on his task. 2 minutes on the bike and treadmill, which would earn the most points, wasn't a very long time so he knew he had to solidly sprint for the entire duration. Switching to a higher gear he really pushed into the pedals and let his strength guide him, speed wasn't his strongest area he knew so he just pushed to do his best, which would hopefully beat Lucci, he couldn't let the smug git win this, he would never hear the end of it from everyone he knew.

When 30 seconds was announced by Foxy, Zoro digged deeper to try and increase his speed if possible, he looked up to see Perona struggling to keep doing any push ups. She had managed to smarten herself up again and the shower cap was gone but amazingly the platform boots were still on, Zoro didn't know how anyone could do this crazy competition in such high shoes, he along with probably the entire room had been endlessly surprised by her abilities.

The whistle went and Zoro was startled by an arm from the Foxy girl stopping his machine. He mind had been wandering so much, he'd forgotten about the woman collecting his score. He soon stopped pedalling and got off the machine. He had no idea if he had done well or not, exercise bikes are something he had never used before in training. Before he knew it he was getting pushed onto the next activity, which for him was the marked gym mat, Melissa moved to the front to the treadmill already looking exhausted. Perona and Lucci moved back, like he had done. Perona and her platforms on the bike and Lucci looking displeased at the parallel bars.

Without wasting anytime Zoro was instructed to get into position on the mat, his toes against the back line. Foxy was saying something but he had long since channelled him out when he wasn't saying anything of importance. A trick he had perfected from being around Sanji so such. The noise lessened cluing Zoro into the whistle sounding soon and when it did he jumped as fast as he could between the lines. Zoro didn't think he had done squat thrusts since the torture was inflicted on everyone in PE when he was still in school but here he was reliving the nightmare all because of his stupid crew. His upper body was fine but the back of his legs, especially after sprinting on the bike previously were really starting to burn. Zoro refused to acknowledge pain in general and went even faster to prove to himself that it didn't hurt. He won't deny that he was relieved to hear the countdown from 10 seconds, what he wasn't prepared for was the rapturous chanting of his name that was going on when he started filtering outside noise into his head again. When he'd stopped and stood up even the Foxy staff guy counting his squats patted him on the back telling him that he was amazing. Stunned, Zoro gave very slight waves to people as he sported an uncomfortable smile and walked forward to the treadmill. Perona looked at him curiously while Lucci as usual looked annoyed and angry. Melissa stopped and said 'well done' with a genuine smile as he passed her. Zoro smiled genuinely back with a thanks before he got into position once again trying to ignore the crowd.

The next activity was delayed for some reason; Zoro noticed everyone looking back and understood that the holdup was Perona refusing to take her boots off for the squat thrusts. Zoro saw Foxy shrug and after another minute or so gave up completely allowing her to keep them on as she had indeed worn them for every other event so far. A few people started booing her because she was being difficult but Foxy eventually returned to his place and told everyone to get ready.

Zoro was thankful for the Foxy staff starting the machine for him because he wouldn't have been 100% sure how to do it himself, the damn machines have far too many buttons and options to choose from. Zoro wondered why people didn't just go out and run around the block, it was much easier and much cheaper. The whistle went once again and the Foxy guy switched the machine to go then screeched loudly that if he wanted to go quicker he had to press a certain button on the left. Zoro was a bit reluctant at first because he was unused to the movement but after picturing Lucci's smug face he raised the speed until he was running flat out. The cheers filtered in and out with his breathing as he focused on one of the sail boats in the water section of the restaurant. He needed the focus so he wouldn't think about how this machine could send him flying backwards. Once the 2 minutes were up Zoro was unsure how he ranking amongst the others, these weren't really strong events for him but at least with the next event, the parallel bars he probably had the advantage. Being a swordsman most of his training was to strengthen his upper body so 2 minutes of push ups was fairly easy for him. Unfortunately it wasn't a necessarily high scoring event.

Being moved on again he was met by a very smiley young woman who would be counting his effort. Perona walked past him looking very pleased with herself as she skipped onto the treadmill. A bit relieved that this annoying competition was almost over Zoro got into position when prompted. He was currently stood on a block lined up by the bars with his hands griping each bar ready for the go signal. Taking a calming breath Zoro focused on a small section of the pitch where two markings met near the centre, he distantly heard the whistle and just pumped his arms in an up and down motion repeatedly. The time flew in a blur as before he knew it the polite smiley Foxy girl was patting his left arm telling him he could stop.

'. . . a true champion ladies & gentleman' Foxy finished suddenly right next to him as the crowd cheered and laughed.

'Well now, Foxy Champions come with me' Foxy gestured, everyone followed in line, Zoro trailing after them at the back, still getting his bearings back. They were lead towards the restaurant entrance where a giant hole in floor suddenly appeared only to be filled seconds later by all of the prizes rising from a hydraulic platform. Just how big was this place? Zoro wondered. But there they were, a shiny new scarlet red Ferrari, an entertainment centre, a sun lounger with cardboard beach scene propped behind it representing the holiday and a briefcase with a bit of cash in it. Zoro flashed back to the other briefcase brought by Lucci for them, which had helped get him into this mess. He was still damp from the water game and really wanted to get this over with already. It was approaching midnight now, he was due some sleep.

'Ladies and gentleman, our champions!' Foxy declared making everyone turn around to face the crowd. They cheered yet again.

'And now, for the moment you have all been waiting for, I will announce the placing of each champion'. The crowd quieted down.

'With a score of 856 our champion in 4th place is' Foxy pointedly looked at everyone to waste time. 'Melissa' he sighed out a little sadly but Melissa looked happy and moved forward to collect her prize as prompted to do by Foxy and a "glamorous assistant" who was stationed amongst the prizes to smile endlessly with her perfect teeth. Once Melissa had moved back in line only now with a briefcase and some beri Foxy continued.

'With a score of 1024, our champion in 3rd place is . . . . . . . . . . . Rob! The crowd clapped but it couldn't drown out the indignant 'WHAT?' that was bellowed from Lucci on hearing the result. Zoro tried really hard not to laugh at Lucci's outraged face as he got warned again about his attitude from Foxy and the crowd had started to boo him for the third time that evening. Lucci reluctantly accepted a kiss on the cheek from the now startled glamorous assistant as he looked loathingly at the state of the art TV he was now the proud owner of.

Perona went for broke and grabbed hold of Zoro's right arm to happily point out that it just the two of them now. Zoro gave her a happy smile although it was actually caused by laughing at Lucci and grunted at her, for the moment brushing off the fact that she was clinging to him due to his good mood. Zoro couldn't be sure but maybe this chick liked him or something but then what if it was just her character? Zoro quickly stopped thinking of such things figuring it didn't much matter either way.

'That Lucci sure is a grump isn't he' she said suddenly, her wide stared eyes directed at the disgruntled crew leader. 'He really needs to get to a spa or something' she continued matter of factly. Zoro who suddenly got the mental image of Lucci with a face pack on his scowling face and cucumber slices over his eyes was hit with a very uncharacteristic fit of giggles.

'Well, ladies and gentleman', Foxy got back on track, 'hopefully a more grateful champion in second place with a score of 1026, that's right, there was only two points in it! Is . . . . . . . . . . . . . . the beautiful Miss Perona!'

'Kyaaaa!' Perona screamed happily.

'Which means our winner of the 275th Foxy Games is number 46, Roronoa Zoro with a massive score of 1252! Come and get your prizes winners!' Foxy bellowed dramatically while the crowd went berserk and started chanting Zoro's name again.

Zoro who was slightly gobsmacked was dragged over to the prizes by an enthusiastic Perona who still had a firm grip on his arm. He noticed that Melissa was clapping him on and that Lucci wasn't. He noticed that Foxy had come over and waved some keys in his face and given Perona an oversized envelope saying Foxy's Holidays. He noticed that the glamorous assistant was trying to give an obligatory well done kiss but that Perona kept blocking her path to him. He noticed these things but it was almost like they were happening somewhere else. He couldn't believe he'd won a Ferrari, he didn't even like driving that much. Zoro shrugged it off and awkwardly smiled and waved to the crowd feeling ever so slightly self conscious and then posed for photos for the Foxy team to keep.

After about 10 minutes or so of being forced to pose against his new car, the rumble in the background indicated that diners were filtering out of the restaurant now that the fun was over. Zoro along with all of the champions were finally allowed to go and get changed back into their normal clothes. Lucci, Perona and himself soon made their way back to their table after almost two hours away from it in various forms of emotion. Kaku had the good grace to give a "well done" to everyone while Sanji focused all of his praise on Perona only, who instead was trying to talk over him.

Zoro sheepishly apologised to Robin for not getting the holiday which Perona was excitedly explaining to anyone who'd listen.

'It is quite alright Mr. Swordsman, I was banking on you winning anyway' Robin said in the way she does when unravelling an ancient secret from our ancestors or something. Zoro just looked surprised but didn't say anything further about it as that meant he's been let off scot free.

'Robin-chwan~' Sanji instead interrupted 'you can't keep secrets from us, what was your plan?' he said deviously giving her all of his undivided attention, for now at least.

'Well Mr. Cook, I put a little bet on, like Foxy had suggested, and put down who I thought would win the top four places, as that bet had the best return.' Robin explained as she took up a slip of paper which she had kept by her thigh.

'So, as you can see, I was actually hoping you would win Mr. Swordsman' Robin ended as she put the betting slip in the centre of the table for all to see.

There was silence until Kaku exclaimed 'whoa, you're one scarily smart lady Robin' he said it in good humour and Robin simply nodded slightly as she looked at her slip.

4th Place: Melissa Tarr, 3rd Place: Rob Lucci, 2nd Place: Perona Adams, 1st Place: Roronoa Zoro

Everyone was temporally shocked at the betting slip that correctly guessed the top four winners in the correct position from the very start of the events, when 50 different people were lined up.

'Robin-chwan is so beautiful when she is all knowing!' Sanji swooned.

Zoro just raised an eyebrow at her thinking about Robin's somewhat scary personality but really couldn't put her win down to anything else then pure luck. There was no way, even Robin, would know for definite who would win that stupid competition from the start. A shiver went down his spine as Robin winked at him with a smirk.

'So, how much did you win?' came Parona's cute yet inquisitive voice.

'Well Ms. Perona, I believe that should be §5000 beri exactly' Robin said with a real smile at the same moment that their waiter Stewart returned to present her prize with a congratulations. After a few pleasantries as he also congratulated everyone for taking part in the events. Robin, tucking her winnings away, placed the briefcase onto the table top.

'It's getting late, perhaps you could kindly let us know what this briefcase is all about so we can all make our ways home' Robin suggested in a gentle but forceful tone, making everyone aware that she was quite done now with the evening.

Lucci, who had been silent the whole time since his return to their table looking slightly disgruntled, fixed his top hat on his continuing frizzy locks and cleared his throat to get everyone's attention.

'CP9 were doing a job recently near the west docks in Orange Town for an IT firm, that isn't of much importance, however, we became aware that a certain other crew going by the name of Buggy's Clowns considered the area and therefore any work around there, their territory.' Lucci paused to sigh dramatically and showed his displeasure. 'They were a constant pain through the entire job, threatening us to leave with things like swinging metal chains, setting off fireworks and shouting taunts but I must say that the crew were incredibly stupid and generally very weak, they were however only goons. One night when we were doing surveillance for our client, Kaku happened to overhear something'. Lucci turned to his other crew mate for him to fill in the blank. Everyone else was waiting patiently in silence for the full story, turning their attention from Lucci to Kaku.

'Well I was monitoring a certain shipping container for our client, I was on the top of it so the Buggy crew didn't know I was there, anyway, I heard two idiots joking about something very surprising and when I looked over the side towards them I saw something even more surprising!' Kaku elaborated without actually revealing anything. Robin sighed, crossing her arms under her bust to show that she was getting annoyed with all of the stalling.

'Kaku, just get on with it!' Lucci said sharply, clearly also getting frustrated. Kaku pouted slightly but decided to get more to the point.

'I overheard them talking about how they got one over on their leader Buggy, the two idiots were bragging about how they had managed to steal a precious hat from him. They obviously didn't know what exactly they then had in their possession but I certainly recognised it immediately.' Kaku paused to start opening the briefcase and Lucci took over the speech.

'Kaku here decided to do you guys a favour, for some reason he likes you, and took this item away from that scum by knocking them out cold. We are aware of what your leader is still searching for; it isn't very hard to figure it out. You may want to pay a visit to Buggy the Clown'. Lucci said in his deep tone, which for once wasn't filled with any anger or loathing.

The case, opened, was presented to the group who all stared on in disbelief. Dirtied but otherwise just as remembered or seen in photos laid the orange cowboy hat that had belonged to the brother of Monkey D. Luffy. The hat which had belonged to Ace!


	7. Meetings and Struggles

A/N: So happy to get a few more reviews. Thanks everyone who did. So this is the shortest chapter I've written so far. This actually makes me quite happy.

Anyway enjoy and please review. The next chapter after this might be a bit more of a wait!

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><p>Zoro was one of the first people Luffy met, who would become one of his closest and dearest friends. They had known each other for just over a decade now. Luffy remembers when Zoro was kinda scrawny, short for his age, mean looking and not really fitting in anywhere. A smile crept across his face as the memories replayed in his head.<p>

The first time Luffy had seen Zoro was when he was in a dingy bar, fighting a guy twice his size in a caged off area in the centre of the room. The bar, ironically called Bar Love, collected all the angry, hopeless and miserable that Grand Line could offer, situated in a poorer area of the city known as Shabody. It would be fair to say that Luffy was immediately drawn to Zoro, not only was he a kid just like himself but he was fighting like a ferocious beast, his eyes were wild but his movements precise and striking. After knocking out his opponent by jumping and punching him directly in the jugular, two or three claps were heard before the rumble of drunken conversation resumed as if nothing had occurred. There he was, dirty, sweating, taking large breaths and staring at the floor in anger and what Luffy knew immediately to be fear and loneliness. How did he know? Because he felt just the same way.

The barkeep opened the cage in no great hurry handing this younger Zoro a bit of money but before Luffy could approach him, Zoro was running out of the bar as fast as his feet could carry him. When Luffy pushed his way through the crowd to get to the door, all he could see down the streets were drunks and piles of rubbish. Zoro was gone. Luffy must have only been about 8 or 9 at the time himself, which would have made Zoro about 11, he wouldn't see Zoro again until just over a year later.

Luffy and his older brother Ace, were pretty much delinquents. Both of them having a dead mother by the age of three and a father who had disappeared by the time Luffy was six, leaving everything behind with a note saying he would make the world a better place and wouldn't return before hand. They were abandoned and didn't trust anyone other than each other before they were had even hit double digits. They would act out, start fights; Ace became obsessed with setting things on fire while Luffy would just beat up anyone who slightly irritated him, which was almost everyone. Their councillor at the orphanage would just tell them that all they needed was love, trust and bonds with others. Dadan, as she was called, Luffy now realises in his older years, was very protective over himself and Ace by preventing many severe punishments, which they probably deserved. Still, at the time, they wouldn't listen to her and didn't care; he and his brother must have made her life hell.

They would sneak out at all hours and head to fight clubs or bars. They were only ever situated in the rough or poor areas of the city and most places wouldn't care that they were kids. Kids fights were considered light entertainment for the crowd of people who had already hit rock bottom. They could earn anything from §10 -100 beli for one fight in these places, which to their younger selves was a lot of money to gain. They returned to the orphanage with constant bruises, scrapes and occasionally burn marks.

Luffy stroked across his chest self consciously. Under his shirt was an ugly burn mark he had received from one of Ace's experiments. Ace had set bits of spirit drenched cloth on fire bound round fire resistant gloves, he wanted to try out how effective the burned for future fights and practiced on his little brother. As he sent the punch towards Luffy's chest with only a bit of force behind it, neither had really anticipated what the searing heat that emanated off the cloth would really cause to unprotected human skin. Luffy still remembers the pain, the smell of burning flesh and the panicked and frantic Ace sending constant apologies between curses. He never held it against his brother though, he thought his scar was kind of cool and matched the small mark under his eye from when he had stabbed himself in the face with a vegetable knife to prove how tough he was to one of his mocking opponents. Of course that was an entirely stupid thing to have done, Dadan certainly wasn't happy when she had to pick him and Ace up from the hospital when any new damage was obtained.

The second time Luffy saw Zoro was in a slightly more reputable fight bar and by that he meant that you would get paid more and the bar was generally much cleaner. However, these minor plus points made this bar a much more popular place for people to gather in. Whitebeard's was much friendlier and more secure, mostly because it was run by huge, burly, ex-sailors who wouldn't tolerate anyone's disruptive behaviour in their establishment. Ace had made friends with most of the staff, in particular their glass collector Marco, who was only a year older than him. Luffy just went along because he had nothing better to do. But this second meeting was the tentative start to his relationship with Zoro.

Whitebeard's had a much more open stage, it was raised, had one solid wall to the back and the rest of the area blocked off from the crowds by only a chain barrier. This meant that spectators could get almost right into the action without, hopefully, gaining any damage from the fights. It they did get hurt, it was not considered the establishments fault but their own instead.

It was a Thursday night in March when Luffy had gone, he was at the bar signing up for a match when Whitebeard himself was announcing a fight between one of his bar staff, Vista, with much fondness and then with less enthusiasm, someone called Roronoa Zoro. Zoro was still just as skinny and angry looking although he had definitely grown a few inches. His telltale green hair, which Luffy thought was the coolest thing about him, was sticking out in tufts from a black bandana tied around his head. Luffy still recognised him instantly and was drawn in yet again by his chaotic presence. What was the biggest surprise to him at the time, however, was the fact that this boy was now carrying a huge katana that almost matched him in height.

Luffy turned his head to the side to observe the snoozing swordsman on the sofa next to him, Zoro was one of the strongest people he has ever known and he doesn't just mean physical strength. Zoro had probably been through more heartache even then himself although he would just deny it. He was a man who carried many scars, emotional and physical and yet he would still walk forward with his head held high. Luffy was glad that he had relentlessly hassled Zoro until they became friends.

It was considered a special fight that night, not only because one of Whitebeard's staff was participating but mainly because fights with dangerous weapons were rarely allowed. Zoro only reached Vista's chest in height, he was definitely short for his age, his baggy clothes, which were obviously too big for his frame also made him look scrawny. But there he was taking on a burly ex-sailor in a swordfight, Luffy was amazed.

As Zoro bowed towards his opponent, something Luffy had never witnessed before in these fight bars, that fierceness he remembered returned to Zoro's eyes. Vista looked remarkably unfazed and didn't return the gesture of respect before the fight either. Luffy instinctively knew from that very moment that Zoro would be victorious. As the fight progressed with Zoro slowly but surely pushing his opponent back, Luffy was getting more and more inspired to be just like him. Zoro was cool and collected in his fighting, only his eyes gave away his emotions and effort, Luffy had never seen such focus and discipline before. When Zoro had eventually managed to disarm Vista to a much more lively applause then when Luffy had last seen him. Luffy was bursting to talk to him and started to push his way through the crowd to get to this boy leaving behind Ace who was asking where the hell he was going.

As Zoro stepped off the stage and collected his winnings from a calm but congratulatory Whitebeard, he had turned towards Luffy, with that grumpy face he saw over a year previous. Luckily he wasn't running out of the place this time so Luffy, actually enthusiastic to meet someone new, blocked his path out of there.

'Hi, I'm Luffy, well, Monkey D. Luffy, I think you're really cool! Hey can I look at your sword? Your hair is green too, which is awesome! Hey will you be my friend? I really like the way you fight. Hey how old are you?' Luffy bombarded excitedly at a very startled swordsman.

'Ehh?' Was all that Luffy got in reply as the swordsman tried to get around him looking for an escape route. Zoro managed to get to the bar with just ignoring Luffy, which Luffy had found really frustrating. Luckily Zoro had to stop here to collect a case for his sword.

'Hey, why are you ignoring me?' Luffy had whined, which seemed to have worked in getting the stubborn boy to cave in.

'Erm, Luffy was it? Erm, what do you want?' Zoro enquired softly looking very unsure about the situation; however, Luffy just beamed a smile at him.

'I really think we should become friends!' Luffy stated.

'Friends?' Zoro looked confused.

'Yeah, you're definitely the coolest fighter I've ever seen, oh and I saw you in Bar Love once before as well but you ran out of there before I could say hi' Luffy blabbed on a little but Zoro just seemed really embarrassed.

'Erm, I have to go now' Zoro had said again seeming unsure about this.

'What? No way! I'm not going to let you go!' Luffy said in all seriousness. 'Please will you just stay until my fight?' without waiting for an answer Luffy called across the bar asking when his fight would be, to which he got a reply that he could have the next match against some unknown. Now Luffy would have to admit that he knew how to manipulate people. Ace had made him aware that he had a "very innocent looking face", something which they had both taken advantage of when trying to get money or a grown up to do something for them. So Luffy had turned his big innocent pleading eyes on Zoro and pretended that he was really upset that he would leave with a slight quiver to his lip.

'Please will you watch my fight Zoro?' Luffy sounded really down.

Zoro clearly struggled with his emotions over what to do, his face going from shock to confusion to worry to uncertainty. He clutched his sword case to his chest as some form of protection but he nodded his head slightly but wouldn't say a word further.

'Cool, watch me kick some arse!' Luffy had stated trying to appear impressive. Zoro just nodded his head as Luffy made his way towards the stage.

Luffy laughed to himself as he recollected how annoying he was, he had tried to copy Zoro by bowing to his opponent before the fight and then given the guy a speech that he should do it as well to show that he honoured the match. The guy he was fighting was probably in his thirties or something and definitely didn't want to be lectured by a little brat like himself. Luffy probably completely humiliated that guy when he had kicked his arse just as he had promised Zoro. Unfortunately after his victory, after a brief nod from Zoro when they made eye contact across the room, Zoro was once more leaving him behind in the bar.

Ace had started teasing him rotten about his failed attempts to make friends when he himself was becoming familiar with almost everyone at Whitebeard's and hanging out there much more often. Although they were nice to Luffy as well, he didn't have the same kind of friendship with them that Ace had. They all knew, however, that Luffy was having quite the obsession with Zoro. In some ways this helped them actually become closer as whenever Zoro booked in for a match at Whitebeard's they would tell Ace who would then in turn tell Luffy.

Luffy eventually got to see Zoro a handful of times every month and he pryed him open a little further on each meeting. Zoro was incredibly introverted when he was younger so every bit of information about him that Luffy gained was like a piece of treasure.

Zoro never knew his family, something he can still claim to date; they had named him then left him. He got passed around from one bad home to the next before deciding to run away at the tender age of 6 and a half. While surviving on scraps on the streets he had by pure chance wandered to Little Tokyo, a section of Grand Line near the west end densely populated with Japanese immigrants. It was very popular with tourists and boasted providing some genuine Japanese culture including food, fashion and lifestyle. It also happened to be where Zoro stumbled across a little girl who probably changed his life.

Kuina was her name, Luffy never had the pleasure of meeting her but he will be forever grateful for what she did for his friend. Apparently Zoro literally stumbled across her, as in, fell over her, down a path near her home, an old fashioned martial arts dojo run by her father. It had been dark and she was crouching in the shadows sulking about being a girl according to Zoro. She had chewed him out for falling over her, and then on the spot challenged him to a fight. Zoro at the time so sure that he wouldn't lose to a girl, especially one as snivelling as Kuina, accepted and was floored within seconds. Zoro still sometimes talks fondly of how he could never beat her but probably only when he is alone with Luffy, Zoro still kept mostly to himself even after all these years.

Zoro had provided all the excuses he could in finding an answer to why exactly he lost to a girl who was only a little bit bigger than him. He ended up spilling out that he had no home and was hungry and therefore it wasn't a fair match because he wasn't at his best. What he didn't anticipate then was to get told off for complaining then marched to her father, Koshiro, who from that night forward would provide a roof over his head, educate him and act as the parent Zoro had never known.

Zoro told Luffy about how he was homeschooled with Kuina until she turned 11 when she went to the local comprehensive school. She was two years older than Zoro so he felt that he got left behind. She would always get into trouble though and fight with the boys in her year, causing Koshiro no end of headaches. Zoro had asked her if school was really that horrible and apparently she had burst into tears on him, telling him how lucky he was to be a boy because he would become a much stronger fighter then her. Zoro was so shocked and angry because he had never beaten her in a match even once so he ended up shouting at her, telling her that she was anything but weak. They trained together with Koshiro learning various martial arts, but they favourite was kendo. They would train in secret too learning other swordsmanship techniques. Battling each other one day, Kuina had insisted that they fight using real blades instead of wooden practice ones. Zoro told Luffy about how at the time he was terrified but he couldn't back down to a girl, right?

After she had beaten him up yet again even though Zoro took the initiative of using two blades against her one katana. Kuina had cried again about him getting stronger and that she wasn't and she wouldn't because she was a girl. Flabbergasted, Zoro had initiated a promise that night that they would become the best swords people in the world because it didn't matter if she was a girl, to Zoro she was his biggest rival and the strongest person he knew and he wanted them both to be the best.

Zoro told Luffy about how they would train and train whenever they had free time; Zoro had taken to trying to fight with three swords at once which had Luffy super excited as he'd only ever seen Zoro use one at Whitebeard's. Zoro told him that he was probably really happy for that short period of time but as always good things didn't last for him.

Zoro was starting school after he turned 11, the same school as Kuina went to. What Zoro wasn't prepared for was the mass amount of teasing that came his way from other kids just because he looked a bit different. Zoro was quite self conscious about his green hair and was undoubtedly very shy although he would never admit it. He was apparently a constant target for any kind of bullying but he would never fight back because Koshiro had told him that fighting someone because of hurtful words was not honourable and never ended well.

About six months into his first year, his only friend and biggest rival fell down some stairs, landed badly and passed away hours later from the impact to her head and body. Luffy remembers being so shocked when Zoro told him this that he had even teared up when Zoro finally revealed why Kuina never came with him to his fights. She had sounded like one cool lady to Luffy. It was probably this moment when Luffy realised that Zoro had come to trust him and that he fully trusted Zoro in return. Something he could not claim easily about others. It had taken him almost a year but he and Zoro were now the closest of friends, he had a bond with someone new.

Zoro apparently only went to the fight clubs so he could continue to become stronger, to keep his promise to Kuina, to be the best. He had said that Koshiro disapproved of the bars and clubs but he had mysteriously handed Zoro Kuina's white katana on the night when Luffy had "attacked" him and he had fought Vista. Zoro was just going to sneak out a crappy practice blade for that match but Zoro was sure that Koshiro always knew what he was up, his and Kuina's dream and somehow Koshiro knew that he had a decent opponent that night. Zoro now fights for himself and Kuina. Luffy had never met anyone so honourable and honest in his life. Zoro positivity gradually rubbed off on him; Luffy knows he became more relaxed and tolerant around people. He still went to the fight bars though because really the people there were his friends now and he had decided that he wanted to protect his friends so they wouldn't get hurt like he had been.

When Luffy reached his 10th year a miracle happened. The orphanage had found someone willing to adopt himself and his brother, even more amazing was the fact they were adopted by someone who was super nice and caring. Generally older kids were incredibly unpopular for wannabe adopters, babies or very young toddlers were what everyone wanted but Makino turned up and decided to pick Ace and himself, still saying that they were only boys. Makino wasn't even super old, she was in her late twenties at the time, she never felt like a mother figure to Luffy and he doubted Ace felt that way either but she was certainly loving and protective and one of the best people Luffy knew and loved.

Luffy probably really started to chill out from then on, he had a best friend in Zoro, who would sometimes visit his new home, even though it was a fair distance away in Zone 3 and Zoro was terrible with directions. He made friends at school as well. Usopp was in his year and a number of his classes, Usopp eventually introduced him to Chopper, his next door neighbour who was a couple of years younger than them but had been moved ahead to his year. Chopper was in all the advance classes though, which Luffy and Usopp were not, they all still hung out a lot though and discussed their dreams for the future. Luffy would actually have dreams like that now.

Ace probably didn't do so well, Luffy didn't know if it was because Ace was older than him by 4 years and just couldn't handle the change so much but Ace never really liked school and would bunk it off a couple of days every week. Makino was worried about him, she even got her friend Shanks to look out for him but Ace was more interested in his friends at Whitebeard's, he even worked there a few nights a week collecting glasses like Marco used to do. Sometimes he wouldn't come home and just stayed the night but Luffy wasn't that worried, he knew he was happy there. Instead Luffy was getting on good terms with Shanks who taught him to really treasure what he actually had in life. He would bring bits of news about his father as well, Shanks' dream was to change to world just like Luffy's dad was doing, a dream that Luffy also started to take on from being so inspired by his stories.

Luffy found out that his father had changed the way a lot of people were treated in less fortunate places. He had helped to almost wipe out world slavery and fought for equal rights between men and woman. Shanks would talk so animatedly about him, when he discovered Luffy was Dragon's son. Luffy guessed that he started to hate his father less for leaving him behind. He had taken to wearing his father's straw hat, one of the few mementoes that Ace had managed to retain before they were taken to the orphanage, to remind himself of what his father had sacrificed to follow his own dream. The hat had since become his distinguishing feature.

Luffy and Zoro still went to fight bars; they still wanted to become stronger after all. A new club opened in Shabody about five years ago called Iva-chan's. Despite the tragic name, it was the most expensive and glamorous thing to hit Shabody in probably decades. Ivanikov, a huge Polish man with purple hair and a transvestite to boot bought and kitted out a massive three story building. The ground level a disco, the first floor a private bar area and the basement had a huge fight arena. The actual fight stage was sunken and about the same size as a tennis court. Spectators could stand all around the sides, or simply watch the matches on several huge screens around the room, where the stage was broadcast live.

No one had seen anything like it before and it quickly attracted a lot of people who wanted to prove their skills. Luffy and Zoro would sometimes drag Usopp and Chopper along with them, they met a lot of people, a lot of people who had grown up in these fight bars as they had, they became acquaintances but not really friends, people would group off and challenge other "teams" in "the pit" as the stage became known.

Luffy, Zoro, Usopp and Chopper had been given the name of "The Straw Hats" by Ivanikov, who had taken a particular liking to Luffy and Chopper. He would tell Luffy that he had a good spirit and he liked Chopper because he was a cute trainee doctor. Chopper often would patch up any cuts and bruises gained from the matches, he'd treat anyone even if they were a rival team and was popular with almost everyone.

It was on Zoro's 19th birthday in November when they had all met Sanji. He had literally barged into Zoro smoking like a chimney and cussing him out big style for getting in his way. In some ways Luffy thinks Sanji is the best present Zoro could have ever gotten. He laughs a bit at the thought but the addition of Sanji gave a spark to Zoro, which hadn't been there previously. Zoro was a man of discipline, honour, respect but mostly isolated himself, he was a loner. Sanji was brash, rude, an idiot around woman and in your face. All in all he completely rubbed Zoro up the wrong way.

When they inevitably arranged a match that night, the first of many to come, the fight had been even with no clear victor, much to the frustration of both. They had so many matches that Sanji ended up constantly hanging around with them all, eventually he just became one of them, and he fitted in. Although Sanji and Zoro routinely clashed, a pattern that still continues to date, Luffy noticed that they got curious about each other. Zoro never showed much interest in anyone but here he had found someone intriguing. Sanji only ever fought with his legs, always keeping his hands safely in his pockets. They got to learn that he was a chef and that he valued his hands too much to risk them in a fight. Sanji was just determined to beat the "samurai wannabe" as he would say, although Luffy knew Sanji was never happier then when he was fighting against Zoro's blades, he suspected that Sanji was a thrill seeker and lonely as hell.

Sanji was so confrontational, whereas Zoro wasn't. However, Sanji's influence managed to get Zoro to argue back, talk more, interact with others and be happier. They constantly wanted to be better then each other, therefore without either of them probably even realising; they had both become some of the strongest competitors in the district as they used each other as training partners. Sanji was Zoro's new Kuina in a way; he was that person who kept him on his toes. Luffy suspected that Zoro to Sanji, an only child to a "very crabby" single father, saw Zoro as some kind of brother figure. Whenever Sanji was frustrated about something or wanted someone to listen to his troubles, it was always Zoro he would seek out first, even if it was unintentional.

So there they were, the Straw Hat crew. Four years ago, there were only five of them. Usopp, a marksman specialist and his good friend, he wasn't the best in a close physical fight but he could certainly inflict damage at a range with his various array of pellets. He was also clever at adapting gadgets and otherwise non-threatening generic objects into super weapons. He would rarely ever lose a fight but Usopp lacked in major confidence and often lied or made up stories to cover up the fact. Chopper, he could be quite scrappy when he needed to be, Choppers strength was his intelligence, he always aimed for people's weak spots by calculating how they guarded themselves. He would then plot strategies to win, all in the space of a few minutes. Zoro protected everyone with his strength and his blades, while Sanji did the same but with his insanely strong legs. Luffy always knew he was their leader; he brought them all together and would spend time with everyone to improve their skills, knowledge and to just hang out and be their friends. Within the next year they gained Franky and Brook, they were a fair bit older than the rest of them but they still became close. Brook was a swordsman too and took great interest in Zoro, they became quite close because of it. Franky was a "life of the party" kind of guy and joined them because they were "the craziest and most fun" in Iva-chans.

It was the end of that year though, 3 years, 4 months and 17 days ago to be exact when Luffy discovered that his brother was killed or murdered. Luffy was angry all over again but more than anything felt so incredibly empty. He had certainly drifted away from his brother in his late teens, he hated himself for it now. Ace had become one of Whitebeard's crew and just wasn't around as much but he would still visit Luffy and Makino as often as he could. They would still laugh and bicker and fight but suddenly he was gone and all Luffy was left with was a useless report about the fact he was dead. No explanation why, where he was at the time or how he had passed.

Luffy twirled around the orange cowboy hat in his fingers that had once belonged to his brother. Zoro had got him out of bed with a serious look as soon as he returned from his job with Robin, which happened to be just after two in the morning. Apparently it had been agreed that Zoro would deliver the news about where CP9 had found this hat but that Robin would be more detailed about the evening events when he was ready. Luffy was grateful for that, he knew he could spill his emotions easier around Zoro, they had been through a lot together after all.

When Luffy had sat in disbelief at the briefcase presented to him, unaware of the flow of tears drifting down his face. Zoro had silently wrapped him up in a supportive hug that had made Luffy's emotions spill out completely. He had sat there until Luffy had calmed himself down, and then offered him one of his rare warm smiles as he ruffled Luffy's hair.

Luffy smiled again, he really did have the best of friends a guy could ever hope for. He was very fortunate in that. As Luffy looked back across at the snoozing swordsman, whose head was lolled back at an awkward angle, which was bound to make his neck stiff whenever he woke up again. Luffy laughed, his team were a little bit ridiculous but then that's what he loved about them. He wouldn't change them for the world.

Luffy sat with determination as dawn creeped up for a new day. He now had to think up a plan on what he wanted to do next. He needed to pay a visit to Buggy the Clown and he knew just the people who would help him. The Straw Hat crew.


	8. Just Take a Deep Breath

Hello readers. Sorry this chapter took so long to churn out. Truth is I started to write a different chapter but then decided I needed to change the order of events. Well that and I haven't put much time aside to write.

Anyway, I hope you enjoy the following

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><p>Even though Sanji had to close at the restaurant the night before, meaning he didn't get back to his bed until about two in the morning. He was getting dragged on yet another ONE PIECE mission with as usual a very grumpy swordsman who was currently glaring out of the passenger side window of his blue BMW saloon. He'd only been driving for about 10 minutes, in the already heavily congested traffic, but he needed to stop for some refreshment to wake himself up, it was stupidly early still, just gone 7:30 but the lack of rest was catching up fast. "Oi Marimo, let's get some breakfast before I start sleeping at the wheel". Zoro as usual just gave a grunt of acknowledgement but that was good enough for Sanji at the moment.<p>

After passing several fast food outlets, which Sanji could never bring himself to eat at unless extremely desperate he pulled into a small shopping complex that had a nice patisserie he had visited a couple of times before. They were on their way to central Grand Line to meet up with one of their few outside contacts Trafalgar Law who most referred to as Dr. Death. Sanji just knew that it was going to be a trip that got every last one of his nerves because it was a well known fact that Zoro didn't particularly like Law, meaning Zoro was going to be twice as grumpy and stubborn then usual throughout the entire mission. Just thinking about it made his craving for coffee and cigarettes all that much stronger.

"Marimo, go get a seat, I'm going to have a smoke first" Sanji got out of the car and stretched, cracking a few joints in his neck before he selected a cigarette from his suit jacket pocket and proceeded to light up. He watched as Zoro silently followed his instructions at a slow walk almost dragging his sword bag into the patisserie. Now that he thought about it, it was unlikely that the swordsman would have had much sleep either, he'd just finished 6 days of competitions at the dojo. He competed, judged and had to be there as a coach for all of his students too, Sanji had barely seen him for the past week. He understood that Zoro had been pulling 15 hour days during the quarterly competitions, now after no proper rest, and Zoro really liked to sleep, he was instead on his next ONE PIECE mission. Sanji sighed; Luffy sure owed them one that was for sure. Stubbing out the filter Sanji made his way to the patisserie with thoughts of much needed caffeine.

Sanji nodded at one of the waitresses as she made her way over to him as he stepped inside, he would normally shower compliments at her for being so attentive but he was just too tired. "Ah, there is no need to show me a seat madam; I'm here with the man with green hair". She nodded and then returned to cleaning down tables. "Yo ho ho ho" Sanji heard the very distinctive laugh of someone else he hadn't seen much of lately. Scanning the dimly lit room, he spotted a head of green moss sitting with a head of huge black afro squashed slightly by a top hat, obviously in the back corner of the cosy but relatively empty patisserie. Passing all the small dark wooden tables and chairs, Sanji turned to take a seat next to Zoro and stared up into the deathly white face and sunken dark eyes of their fellow Straw Hat member 'Humming' Brook. "Brook, long time no see".

"Ah Sanji, I was just telling Zoro here that it has been far too long since I last saw you both. What good fortune it is that we've met in the same cafe". Their small table clattered suddenly as Zoro's elbow slipped off the table's edge, switching Sanji's attention to the mossy lump. "Yo ho ho ho ho ho, do try to stay awake Mr. Roronoa" Brook melodiously laughed in his very unique way, Zoro just looked grumpy as he blinked a few times. "So Brook, what have you been doing since we last saw you?" Sanji interrupted with ease as he scanned through a menu, his eye catching on the smoked salmon and scrambled eggs on toast. "Yo ho ho, well you know I can't tell you many details _here_ but let's just say I'm working on getting some _information_ from Enel, the boss of Skypia Lounge. Of course I'm his newest musician as well". Brook explained with his aristocratic dandy flair. "Enel, the leader of the God's Army crew? What do you want with that egotistical prick?" Sanji asked biting back his last words slightly as their waitress approached. After listing off their orders and waiting until the staff were out of earshot Brook continued with some mirth "What, you haven't heard?" when he was faced with two tired but blank faces he relented. "Well, truth is Shanks has asked for him to be watched" at the look of surprise directed at him Brook continued "Enel's been asking around for investment for a 'project', we want to know what it is". "How come we didn't know about this?" Zoro asked in a sleepy baritone looking confused. "Well, I thought you would know" Brook replied "Robin did tell me that you have both been busy as of late?" "Yeah" Sanji groaned and stretched some more "I guess we haven't been doing that side of work for a couple of weeks". Wiping his eyes he was grateful that the sight of coffee was heading his way.

Emptying half of his cup within a few seconds Sanji sighed out in satisfaction. There was nothing quite like French coffee in the morning. He could instantly feel his energy pick up and his mood relax. Zoro tiredly sipped at some green tea while Brook had a small pot of English tea with some strawberry cake. "So, where are you heading now?" Sanji asked Brook for polite conversation. "Well, I'll be going to bed, yo ho ho ho, unlike you two I finished my gig just over an hour ago. I'm having breakfast then bed, yo ho ho ho ho". Brook's laugh was arguably both his best and worst characteristic, it was a fairly funny melodic sound but at the same time it was quite high pitched, which Sanji did not welcome so early in the morning. "You're both going to be Dr. Death's new test subjects aren't you? I don't envy you" Brook continued looking slightly sympathetic. "What? Is that true crap cook?" Zoro was suddenly very alert and looking to Sanji for answers. Sanji inwardly groaned, as usual Zoro hadn't bothered to read his brief "shut it Marimo, and not as such, its work for Luffy remember" he glared, Zoro did not look happy but he wasn't whining at least. It was always worth throwing Luffy's name in there when he needed the marimo head to behave. Before he knew it their breakfast had arrived, just in time to dispel the souring mood. Zoro and Sanji ate in relative silence as Brook talked at them at length about his musical exploits. How he played for the wealthy Neferati family a couple of weeks ago and then how one of his musical heroes 'Jazz Man' Laboon saw one of his performances and enjoyed it so much that they later jammed together to an ecstatic crowd. "Yo ho ho, look I got a photo of us together" Brook explained further as he showed the picture he had on his phone to them both. Sanji couldn't help but think that the other musician looked like a whale next to the stick thin Brook, his shiny bald head next to Brook's huge afro looking equally ridiculous.

"Well chaps, it has been great to see you both again but I'm going to make my way home, the sandman is calling you know, yo ho ho" Brook smiled followed by a huge yawn. "Sure, we'll see you again soon no doubt" Sanji replied while Zoro nodded "Oh absolutely" Brook continued whist moving to stand to his incredible 8 foot height and leaving some notes on the small table. "Good luck today boys, Yo ho ho ho" Brook said cheerfully as he adjusted his suit on his thin frame and grabbed his customised walking cane. He then proceeded to walk out of the patisserie humming a tune to himself true to his nickname. "Looks like Brook paid for breakfast" Zoro broke the silence as he flicked through the cash left on the table. "Hmm, well that was nice of him. Come on Marimo, let's get going we're supposed to be at Law's for 8:30" Sanji suggested as he got up himself and patted his pockets for his cigarettes, he already knew that they were going to be late. "Hey, are you actually going to tell me what it is we'll be doing at Law's?" Zoro grumbled as he moved away from the table carrying his duffle bag more aloft now. "Do you know what?" Sanji paused dramatically "no I won't, maybe this way you'll actually learn to read your task brief for once, stupid Marimo". Zoro groaned "come on cook, I've been busy" "As have I yet I still manage to find some time to know what I'm supposed to achieve on these jobs". Zoro just stalked off to the car grumbling about 'irate chefs' Sanji smirked and lit up another cigarette as soon as he was out of the door.

After travelling for another 10 minutes they were officially stuck in rush hour traffic, which stretched ahead as far as the eye could see. "What the shit? Why did we have to meet Law so early anyway? I hate travelling to the centre when everyone goes to fucking work. Fuck!" Sanji cursed and groaned rolling his had back onto the headrest. "I don't know, I didn't read the brief" Zoro replied unhelpfully still looking out of the passenger window. "Yeah, thanks for that shithead" Sanji flicked him in the back of the head "Oi!" Zoro turned to glare at him, Sanji just laughed. "When are we going to go out drinking Marimo? It's been ages and I want to meet some ladies". Sanji would never admit it to him but Zoro was his favourite drinking partner and he generally preferred going out with him socially then any of the other Straw Hats, probably because he wasn't a loud mouth idiot like the rest. Zoro yawned looking forward at all of the traffic "Why don't we go after this job with Dr. Death? We could go to some places in the centre for a change although I guess it all depends on if we come out alive from his clinic". Sanji laughed again shaking his head as he allowed the car to crawl further up the road in the slow moving line. "I honestly don't get why you hate Law so much, so he's cracked a few jokes at your expense, I've probably done far worse to you". Sanji smirked as Zoro gave his best 'you're joking right' face, which made him look confused more than anything else. "Cook, you only annoy me on a near constant basis" he said in all seriousness making Sanji snort. "Law, however, offers you tea, which you accept, then proceeds to laugh at you for the next two hours because he'd slipped a muscle relaxant in there. So while you're panicking because you can't coordinate and barely move and don't know why, there is a doctor manically laughing while randomly prodding parts of your body _for fun_. He's frickin' crazy, I'm telling you, he'll have something up his sleeve!" Sanji wasn't partnered with Zoro when this apparently happened because he was working at the restaurant. Unfortunately for Zoro he was instead sent with Usopp who he had naturally assumed exaggerated the whole story about their visit grossly when they returned. The only thing he could picture clearly and think of as likely true was how mocked and livid the Marimo was by the end of it all. "Poor Marimo, I'll protect you this time" Sanji teased "Fuck off shit cook".

45 slow going minutes later Sanji and Zoro were finally reaching their destination of Supernova Green, south-west central Grand Line. The streets were lined with symmetrical tall light grey and sand coloured mansion buildings with equally symmetrical tall panes of glass windows set into them. There were lush gardens in autumn colours everywhere creating a feeling of space and peace despite the fact that they were in the middle of the always busy and built up city. The area was famous for having some of the most advanced medical offices in the world. It was where Chopper dreamed of ending up someday. It was the home to some of the most expensive and specialist clinics in Grand Line.

Sanji pulled into a narrow side street which accessed a small underground parking area for The Blue Heart Clinic. They weren't really supposed to park there but Sanji was told that Law always took the underground metro everywhere so wouldn't be using his designated space. They were currently running about 40 minutes late, which bothered Sanji a little as he did like to be punctual but he really saw that there was no helping it today. "Where do we go Marimo?" Sanji wouldn't normally ever ask Zoro for directions anywhere but the fact was, Zoro had been here before, whereas he had not. "His space is just there" Zoro pointed to the left, Sanji was relieved to see a name plate with displaying Law's name just where Zoro was pointing, meaning he wouldn't have to drive in a small circle for another 10 minutes looking for it. Parking up Zoro go out of the car and strapped his swords bag to his back suddenly looking very grave, Sanji couldn't help but laugh again. "Calm down Marimo, I don't think we're about to experience the zombie apocalypse". He took the opportunity to light up another cigarette as they walked around to the front entrance bickering all the way.

The double door entrance swung open in a smooth motion as they approached bringing forth a waft of disinfectant to their noses that was slightly unpleasant. They walked up to a small reception of curved sandblasted glass where a dopey looking guy was sat in front of an enormous white teddy bear. Sanji glanced around; the room was very sleek and well kept, with black leather seats, potted plants and modern art on the walls. He couldn't spot a child's toy or out of place magazine anywhere which just made the fact that there was a teddy bear taller then he propped behind the reception all the more bizarre. Zoro however didn't seem fazed as he told the dopey guy that they were here to see Dr. Law, it was then that Sanji noticed the receptionist's name plate "Bepo Bear?" Sanji accidently said aloud making Bepo and Zoro both turn to stare at him. "Ah, sorry, I was distracted by the giant bear then read your name" Sanji pointed out feeling slightly stupid for doing so, at the flash of anger flitting through Bepo's expression; he quickly understood he had apparently said something wrong. Bepo tapped in a few digits on his desk phone with perhaps a bit more force then was necessary and picked up the receiver. "The people you were waiting for are here" he said, then paused to listen, and then hung up. "Dr. Law will be down in a few minutes" Bepo told them both in a slightly grumpy fashion. Sanji made some effort to try and look anywhere else other then the giant bear or slightly chubby man with fluffy greying hair and sticky out ears after that. "Actually, why is there a giant stuffed bear in here?" Zoro enquired in his usual bored tone after a minute or so, clearly not having picked up on Bepo's discomfort about the subject earlier. Bepo's eyes turned to slits as he stared Zoro down but Sanji would have to admit he was curious. Bepo's eyes softened after a while, deeming the oblivious Marimo as no threat. "Some of the doctors here thought it was _hilarious_ to buy it for me because it has the same name as me" Bepo said defensively. Sanji watched Bepo's face practically daring them to laugh; once again he had to turn his head to look anywhere else to prevent his laughter from bubbling through like it so wanted to. "And if you squeeze Bepo Bear's arm he says the cutest things as well" came a new deep voice from the right corridor. In strolled Law with a slight smirk, giving the stuffed bears arm a squeeze "you're my best friend" a goofy cartoon voice replied, "awe, thanks Bepo" Law muttered giving the bear an affectionate pat, the human Bepo Bear appeared to sulk at the action, "Sanji, Zoro, follow me".

Grateful to leave the reception area Sanji and Zoro followed Law down a neat corridor filled with more potted plants and art work with the occasional break of a door here and there until they reached an elevator towards the end. Law turned towards them as he pressed the button to call the elevator "had a good trip here this morning guys?" he said in his usual laid back way. Law wasn't the stereotypical kind of doctor you might imagine, the kind of clean cut and wearing a white coat kind. He was more than likely going to be casually attired; he was a fan of tattoos, the most noticeable up his arms and was partial to a bit of smudged black eyeliner under his eyes as well. "Yeah sorry we're a bit late; the traffic getting here was a complete nightmare". Sanji felt the need to apologise but not the need to mention that they had stopped for breakfast. Law just kept his same lax smile and shrugged his shoulders not seeming to care either way as he stepped into the elevator that had just opened before them. "Hmm, wouldn't it have been better to come after rush hour traffic?" Law questioned as he pressed the button for the fourth floor after everyone had entered. Sanji and Zoro just stared at him "yeah, it would have but we were told you requested us to be here for 8:30" Sanji said in mild disbelief. It was Law's turn to stare at them and then smirk and start chuckling, scratching at his goatee beard. The doors opened on the fourth floor where Law stepped off and proceeded to walk down another corridor straight ahead expecting them to follow. "That wasn't exactly the arrangement" Law continued opening the second door along the corridor on the right, "when I spoke to Robin I just told her that the products was ready, she then suggested a load of dates and times when you would turn up. I said I was free on a number of them. She then told me you would be coming today at 8:30" Law finished as he turned to sit behind a fairly worn wooden desk in his small office regarding the suddenly more tired looking faces before him. "Ms. Robin did?" Sanji whined pitifully, Zoro just shook his head and rubbed his eyes as if a sudden headache was approaching. "Aww, did you have a late night boys?" Law couldn't help but mock in full sarcasm and grinned at their un-amused faces sweeping his almost black short hair across his brow.

Dr. Death's office was surprisingly ordinary, besides the worn oak desk, which certainly wasn't new; everything was as slick and beige and clean as the rest of the building. There was no window and there were horrible beam lights overhead, it was just a standard box room with another door to the left. Zoro and Sanji stood uncomfortably before Law's desk while he continued to grin up at them. "So you're here to help me test out a few things that I talked about with Luffy" Law eventually elaborated turning in his swivel chair to get some keys out of his desk drawer."I want to know what it is exactly we are '_testing_' as you put it" Zoro almost growled looking very weary, Sanji just rolled his eyes. "Whoa, has anyone ever told you that you can be pretty scary Zoro?" Law questioned in a clearly fake scared tone and observed how Zoro crossed his arms defensively. "Would either of you like a drink at all? He continued brightly "Hell no!" Zoro spat making Law giggle again. Sanji just sighed at the stupidity of it all; considering Law was a few years older than them and was verging on genius territory he was as much of an idiot as the stupid Marimo. Sanji wasn't sure how the connection started between Law and the Straw Hats but he knew Law was connected with Shanks as well doing some sort of research then he was just suddenly amongst them. He was certainly handy to have around, when Zoro almost got his feet chopped off in one of his stupid sword fights with some complete douche bag who called himself 'Mr. 1', Law had him fixed up again in a few hours, no questions asked to a much in awe Chopper. "So Law, what is it you have to show us?" Sanji interrupted the scowling and giggling contest before him. "Well, why don't you both follow me to my lab next door?"

Law opened the side door which instantly flooded in bright sunlight making his box office appear all the duller because of it. As they stepped through, the lab was a long oblong room with huge windows on the left wall and had a slightly humid feel to the atmosphere. There was a row of three medical beds to the left, thinly padded and covered in a sickly shade of yellow leather. The right wall was dominated by a long desk with no end of medical instruments and bottles of the unknown spread at somewhat equal intervals. The end of the room had a couple of cages containing a few mice and an enormous sink with several clean beakers to the side. This obviously wasn't a room for regular patients Sanji mused as he noticed the Marimo fiddling with his bag strap looking very uncomfortable. It was so uncharacteristic of the swordsman that Sanji started to pick up a bit of anxiety as well because of him. Law went to seat himself on a wheeled stool chair by the desk and gestured to a couple of slightly beaten wooden chairs next to a bushy plant, which Sanji soon realised was a pitcher plant by the fact that a fly was floating very much dead in one of the cavities. Moving the chair a bit further away from it he took a seat opposite the doctor. "I thought this place was supposed to be a clinic" Sanji had to question, the carnivorous plant having unsettled him further. Law looked surprised "It is, patient rooms are on the 2nd and 3rd floor, admin and consultation rooms on the 1st and ground level. The theatre is underground. This floor is mostly just storage with a couple of rooms for research". Sanji relaxed a little, he guessed it explained why the furniture was certainly less cared for here and the lack of art work when they stepped from the elevator. "So anyway, I've got a couple of things to test for Shanks. The first is a 'truth serum' or rather a drug that should triple the amount of anxiety you feel when you're about to tell a lie, which theoretically should allow us to know easily if someone is lying or telling the truth from their body language". Law explained pausing to roll further down the room to pick up a bottle with a purple liquid inside. "The second" he continued rolling back towards them "is a quick knock out gas, it's scentless and should be able to knock out a room of criminals, for example, for about 20 minutes". Law finished with a calm smile resting his chin on his tattooed hands saying 'LOVE' and 'HATE'.

"What happens if we don't want to test either of these things for you" Zoro asked in a rather dull tone, which Sanji wouldn't normally have expected considering the circumstances, he was expecting more of a tantrum. "I'll find a way, just like I did last time until I get what I want. It will be far easier for you to just be compliant". Law yawned scratching at his sideburns. "Fine, just do it so I can leave as soon as humanly possible!" Zoro declared with a huge sigh as he looked towards the high ceiling resigning to his fate. Again Sanji turned to him very much surprised by his compliance, unfortunately that meant he would have to be compliant as well so he wouldn't lose face although truth to tell he wanted to high tail it out of the entire building. Law's mood perked up as he waved about the purple liquid bottle and a bigger bottle filled with a clear liquid in Zoro's direction. "Oh good news, which one do you want to try out?" Law said enthusiastically making Zoro recoil slightly. "Huh, I'll try the stupid truth serum for you" Zoro decided having lost all fight to protest. "Excellent choice sir" Law said jovially "that leaves you with the knock out gas Sanji, congratulations!" Law spun on his chair to show his mock happiness, Sanji was starting to lose his patience with the situation in general and gave an angry frown. Ignoring him Law got up to lay tissue sheeting across the old bed nearest to them "Zoro could you please lay back here for me" Law lost the mocking tone and slipped into a professional one. The Marimo stomped over and hopped on the bed after carefully removing his precious swords bag and laying them on the floor by his side. Law meanwhile was preparing a syringe with some of the purple liquid and ordering the Marimo to remove his baggy black shirt. Sanji was feeling nervous for him, his earlier breakfast now churning in his stomach, he wasn't sure he could handle some experimental drugs being injected into him but the Marimo just looked as focused as ever. Law washed his hands then proceeded to snap on some rubber gloves looking extremely calm before returning to Zoro and massaging his arm. "I need a vein" he explained then wiped at a bit of skin with what Sanji could only assume to be a disinfectant wipe before plunging in the needle deep and squeezing in the purple solution.

It was all over in seconds, the syringe removed, gloves off and Law telling the Marimo to relax for a few minutes. "Well then, that should be enough time so let's start off easy, Sanji you can join in too as you know him better" Law smoothly explained once again perched on his stool but now holding a clipboard to make notes. Sanji moved over from his seat to rigidly take a seat on the next bed over giving him a better view of Zoro who had paled considerably. "Hey, are you okay Marimo?" Sanji asked in concern but when he received a grunt and an annoyed but determined glance from said test subject he inwardly sighed in relief that he was his same old self.

"We'll start off with some simple yes and no answers" Law spoke in a businesslike manner "Is your name Roronoa Zoro?" Zoro grunted in reply "If you could actually say yes or no rather than grunt, it would be much more useful" Law explained calmly. Sanji thought he would honestly have kicked him instead. "Yes" Zoro finally replied in exasperation "just get on with it rather than ask pointless questions". Law raised an eyebrow "very well. Have you ever wanted to dye your hair black so you'd look more normal?" he asked almost monotonal. "What" Zoro barked with a glare aimed at the Doctor. "Please answer the question" Law responded not even the slightest bit effected. "Yes" Zoro grumpily replied looking away from them both almost pouting, Sanji could help but snort at his surprisingly vain insecurities, Law just made a note that he was telling the truth.

"Do you have any romantic feelings towards Robin?" Sanji asked after a couple more questions from Law regarding the Marimo's appearance. He was hoping for an honest negative answer but he had his suspicions about the two of them from how he would sometimes catch them glancing at each other. Zoro's face scrunched up as if he was struggling to answer, which caught Law's attention as much as it did Sanji's. After much fidgeting and a couple of attempts to answer before shutting his mouth again making Sanji sit forward in anticipation digging his short nails into the ugly yellow leather bed beneath him they were rewarded with a blank face and a "No". Sanji was staring down Law in a flash to know if it was the truth or not. "Why did you struggle so much to answer?" Law asked, "I admire Robin a lot and she is beautiful but I don't think I have romantic feelings for her" Zoro responded in what seemed like honesty to Sanji. Law just hummed and wrote a question mark next to his question, so he still didn't really know the answer to that question.

The questions had been steadily going on for about 10 minutes and according to Law's results Zoro hadn't given a single lie yet. Sanji didn't know if that meant the serum was seriously good and couldn't make you lie or if the marimo was just being plain honest, he wasn't generally known for lying anyway. Sanji was beginning to get a little tired and distracted until Law asked the most random question ever. "Have you ever thought it would be fun to try on one of Ivanikov's drag queen outfits?" Sanji almost laughed at the stupid question but the sudden strain and almost painful grimace across the swordsman's face instead had his jaw hitting the floor in shock. It was so obvious that the marimo was struggling with his answer; not only his face scrunched up in discomfort but like his entire body was trying to physically wiggle away from the question. "No!" Zoro kept insisting repetitively, "oh my fucking god!" Sanji said still in shock. Law finally had a happy smile across his face rather than his usual smirk and started jotting down the effects of trying to lie under the influence.

After Law had finished his notes and Sanji's unsuccessful attempts to get the Marimo to confess what kind of outfits he'd like to try on, Zoro was left to sulk while it was Sanji's turn to lie back and be a guinea pig. On again were the rubber gloves as Law set up some whirring white box type machine that was turning the clear liquid from before into a gas. "Right then Sanji" Law calmly started "your test is a little simpler". Law wheeled across on his stool to the side on the central bed, where he was lying, bringing with him a breathing mask, Sanji's heart rate was increasing steadily with every inch it came closer to his face. "What I need you to do is just breathe normally with this mask on. You'll quickly start to feel woozy then you'll simply be in a deep sleep". Sanji's adrenalin was beginning to peak despite the calmness of Law's voice."You should be out for 20 minutes to an hour". Sanji just nodded his head; he couldn't speak because his mouth had gone so incredibly dry. "Just relax" Law continued as he brought across the breathing mask and attached it to his head, then he spun to his machine again and Sanji started to faintly feel a few wisps of moisture over his top lip. Suddenly his vision was starting to dissolve, spotting like the static on a TV screen, the whirring of the machine was gone, and he couldn't even hear his heart beat. He was floating in dull grey void until his head plunged inwards and he was falling fast into a pit of the deepest black.


	9. What's That Sound?

A/N I had quite a lot of fun writing this chapter so I hope you all like it as well readers. Enjoy!

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><p>Sanji woke feeling incredibly groggy and like something had died in his mouth, whatever he was lying on also felt deeply uncomfortable. Blinking his eyes open he became aware that it was fairly dark with a scattering of light beams around the walls in front of him. Stretching out all of his limbs, he was awarded with the chorus of several joints clicking back into place then one hideous crack from stretching out his back. Things were starting to come into sharper focus, first the smell of disinfectant quickly followed by the fact that he had a tube inserted into the back of his right hand. Now very much awake; Sanji sat himself up trying to assess the situation. Looking around he saw some caged mice in the corner, a long bench filled with various coloured bottles and one marimo head lying on a doctor's bed next to him snoring comfortably. So he was still in Law's lab and had obviously been knocked out for much longer than 20 minutes judging by that fact that it was night outside. Ripping the tube from his hand he sighed and lied back down figuring he may as well sleep some more until morning.<p>

When Sanji next woke daylight was starting to stream through the windows behind his head, groaning slightly he sat himself up scratching at his mop of hair, which felt oddly greasy, puzzling him exceedingly. Next thing he knew a calm looking Law was approaching him "good morning Sanji, how are you feeling?" Sanji eyed him in suspicion "like shit" he mumbled rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. "Sorry, the gas worked a little better than I had planned for" Law continued, not looking sorry at all judging by his usual smirk in place. "What's up with the marimo?" Sanji enquired considering Zoro was still flat out snoring away, this in itself was not an unusual scene but he noticed that he too was attached to a drip in the proper lighting. "Well, it was quite sweet really" Law started looking across at the sleeping swordsman "when you didn't wake up after an hour he got very upset, started accusing me of poisoning you and other such things and then started threatening me with his swords". Law paused as a grin stretched across his face "he started to really get on my nerves after a few hours and I had other work to attend to, so I used a bit of the knock out liquid and slipped it into his tea". Law started laughing, which made Sanji lean away slightly "he fell for the same trick twice" he continued to giggle. Sanji was not impressed at all and vowed there and then to never be Law's test subject ever again, fuck Shanks' research, Zoro was right, Law was just really fucking creepy.

As if sensing that he was the butt of a joke, Zoro choose to wake up to Law's incessant laughter with a huge groan as he stretched out. Law got up and walked over to him "wakey wakey Zoro, did you have a nice sleep?" he said in a huge amount of sarcasm. "Get the fuck away from me you damn nutcase!" Zoro bit out with a surprising amount of venom considering he'd only just woken up. He got to his feet immediately and ripped the tube from his hand, "come on cook, we're leaving!" Sanji didn't need any further prompting; although he felt like he could do with a serious wash he was willing to look and feel a bit grubby so long as he could finally leave the clinic. "Looks like we'll have to postpone that drink Marimo, I've got work tonight now" Sanji sighed in annoyance.

"Ah, gentleman, before you go" Law spoke up to their retreating backs "you should probably know that you have both been asleep for the past three days, it's now Thursday". Sanji was the first to react "are you fucking kidding me?" all of his built up frustration finally getting vented "you said that stuff only lasted 20 minutes". Law backed away raising his palms up in surrender "I had a miscalculation but I got a lot of amazing research thanks to you both" He said in complete calmness and still had that smirk that Sanji was beginning to find infuriating. "A 'miscalculation'? That's putting it mildly, I've missed two days of work thanks to you fuckhead, and so has Zoro!" "Let's just go cook, he doesn't care" Zoro responded trying to calm Sanji down "well he bloody well should care!" Sanji spat "don't expect us to help you with your research ever again, in fact it'll be best if you just stay the hell away from us for a while".

"Oh, you'll be back" Law teased as soon as Sanji finished his rant "after all, I got some amazing data on what you dream about Sanji". Zoro immediately held the cook back sensing he was going to attack the doctor at any moment. "Did you know you talk in your sleep? Really Sanji, you are quite the sexually frustrated young man. I was very surprised to hear who you were dreaming about though". Law smirked more and flicked his eyes to Zoro before quickly returning them to the cooks "you wouldn't want that kind of information getting out". Zoro relented and let go of the squirming cook in his grasp, quite frankly Law deserved whatever the cook threw at him. Zoro waited by the door as he watched Sanji jump forward then pivot on his left foot before driving his right foot into Law's gut at a faster and deadlier pace than normal. Law literally had no time to react, which was why he was now crouched forward cradling his wounded mid section. "I'm calling bullshit on that one Law. Oh and you fucking had that coming" Sanji ground out "Marimo, we can leave now". With that they both left the lab leaving behind a pitiful Doctor Death cringing on the floor.

Sanji was on his phone as soon as they got out of the elevator letting Luffy know just what he would be doing to Law the next time he saw him, in graphic detail. Zoro thought this was quite the pointless activity as Luffy was unlikely to do anything to 'avenge' them and would probably just laugh at the whole situation. Apparently it was true though, the part where they had been out of action for the past three days. Robin had thankfully been in contact with the dojo and restaurant telling them that we were "very sick" and couldn't come in. Zoro left the cook to simmer; he could tell he was still fuming because he had smoked down three cigarettes in what was probably under a minute. Climbing back into Sanji's car Zoro noted that yet again it was just gone 7 o'clock in the morning making him groan despite the fact he had just had the longest sleep of his life. The cook eventually lumbered into the driver's seat after another cigarette, truth be told he looked terrible, well for Sanji. His suit was all crinkled up and it was obvious that his hair hadn't seen a comb for a few days, not to mention the fact that he stank of sweat and cigarettes. Zoro doubted he looked brilliant either but the cook was always so immaculate that he just seemed worst off. After a long sigh Sanji started up the engine and pulled out of Law's parking space "it's so good to finally be getting out of here" he said as he turned into the side street "yeah, step on it cook" Zoro responded and Sanji did, he tried to get out of Supernova Green as quickly as possible.

They had been heading north for about 15 minutes and the traffic around them had steadily been getting heavier. The cook had been uncharacteristically quiet since they left the clinic but more importantly he could tell that the cooks' mood had calmed but that he was now feeling low. "Are you okay cook?" Zoro found himself asking, which just made the cook sigh loudly again."Yeah, did you want to get breakfast somewhere? We've been on fluids only for the last three days". Zoro agreed knowing that the cook was obsessive about how everyone should be eating three good meals a day, in particular breakfast. Central Grand Line wasn't the easiest place to find somewhere to stop though and it was while they were looking for a place to pull over that they heard a grainy static of a poor quality recording. What sounded like shuffling noises were suddenly filling the car with a constant background of light snoring. Zoro looked across at the cook confused only to see him equally frowning as he continued to watch the road. Suddenly giggles that were unmistakably the cooks were spilling out of the car speakers "no not that one, the purple one Marimo, no the purple one" came the cooks voice followed by more shuffles. Zoro was slightly gawping at the cook now as he frantically pressed all of the buttons on his car stereo system with no success at switching off the sound. "you look really pretty" Sanji's voice boomed out in his slightly high pitched voice that he usually reserved for flirting unsuccessfully with women. Zoro was starting to feel very uncomfortable and the cook next to him was getting angrier and redder in the face with each unsuccessful attempt to get rid of the sound. "Wahh, marimo?" more shuffles were heard "no, I'm gonna kick your arse . . yeah I like red heels, you should shave your legs . . ha ha ha . . rock your body, don't stop moving . . huh? But I like boobs, you should get boobs Marimo". "What the hell were you dreaming about shit cook?" Zoro ended up bellowing slightly creeped out and outraged to a beetroot red chef. "I don't know, I was drugged remember!"

Sanji sped round the next left junction and parked messily in the nearest available space abruptly. The recording of himself had started singing a song about boobs which was both tuneless and disturbing. "Marimo help me find where Law has planted a recording device". Sanji flung off his seat belt and promptly blind searched all the crevices inside his car. Zoro got out of the vehicle and checked the boot then went to open the hood to see if he could find anything after the boot appeared completely empty. Zoro stared blankly at the engine and all the other parts and wires not having a clue where to even start looking. After glancing at everything for the third time the cook bellowed "Marimo, I've found something under my chair!" Moving back to the passenger side he witnessed the cook almost doing the splits in his seat with his head almost completely buried under it. The cooks' flexibility still shocked him at times. "Zoro can you look from the back seat?" Zoro did as he was told; the cook clearly loosing it if using his actual name but then the recording now sounded like the cook was starting to enjoy his dream quite a lot, which was very unpleasant to hear. Manoeuvring himself around his seat and squeezing in the back because Sanji's car was only three doors, he eventually spotted what the cook had found "it looks like an mp3 player" Zoro pointed out. "It's stuck on something Marimo, can you get it?" Sanji asked "yeah, Law's heavily glued it to some wires". Zoro reached down easily taking the small object from the cook and gave it a good hard pull that easily snapped out the wires and cut off the cook's groans from the car speakers. They both sighed in unison with relief until a loud bang had them jumping out of their skin.

After the ringing in his ears had subsided Zoro blinked his eye open realising that he had instinctively buried his head into the back seat screwing it shut. He was feeling clammy and registered that the cook was cursing more then usual. Slowly he sat up and could only stare for a few moments at the complete state that Sanji's car was now in. There was blue everywhere, on the windows, on the seats, on the roof, all over themselves and because his passenger door was slightly open, on the street outside. Zoro dabbed at his left arm that was covered in the cobalt blue damp substance, it felt soft and slick at the same time and appeared to smudge very easily. The cooks bitching started to filter in more as Zoro's hearing returned to normal. "I'm going to kill him. Kill him slowly and painfully. Not even Usopp would pull this kind of shit. My fucking suit is ruined, completely ruined. That bastard is dead the next time I see him." Zoro didn't feel the need to comment, he agreed Law really had it coming now; this was obviously the weirdoes work, his sense of humour was always at someone else's misfortune. Zoro removed his ruined black shirt and tried to clean the back window until you could at least see out of it. "Cook, we need to get out of here, I don't want the police to start sniffing around. That bang was pretty loud, someone may have reported it, we're already gaining a crowd". Sanji turned to him in a complete rage only his face and hair were completely blue, Zoro admittedly had to try had not to laugh at the cooks' misfortune. "He fucking wired that mp3 to the air bags, only he'd replaced the bags with whatever shit this is". Sanji gestured to himself "I swear, he is getting destroyed for this" he huffed and removed his jacket to wipe the front window "we'll have to go to Franky's; we can't drive like this back to HQ with the state my car is in now". They both quickly tried to clean the windows as much as possible before the cook sped out of their stopping space leaving behind a huge blue stain on the ground and a few gaping bystanders who were probably putting the whole thing on the internet.

It was Zoro's turn to be on the phone now explaining the possible need for damage control to the office and then to Franky about their upcoming impromptu visit after the cook aggressively threw his phone at Zoro's head. Consequently Sanji's phone was now also blue instead of its previous black. Franky lived and worked in central Grand Line, fairly close to his step brother Iceburg. Zoro absently had to wonder in the back of his mind, if they didn't attract police attention by the general state of the car they were in; it would surely be because of the cooks speeding and general dangerous driving. Luckily after another 5 minutes Franky's tacky sigh for 'Franky House' was spotted out of the blue tinted window. Sanji seemed to increase his speed further at the sight of it and was soon skidding under the wooden archway entrance and abruptly halting once again in the relative safety of a warehouse. Franky House was a real hotchpotch of different buildings and textures; the part he lived in was traditional stone, his design studio brick and glass, the warehouse metal and everything else in between natural wood. Potentially it could have looked like an eyesore but Franky had made it all fit together in an almost sleek modern way. It was only the neon yellow sign with shadowed palm trees and the orange tie-dyed camper van outside which ultimately showed Franky's other personality.

A looming shadow passed over the rear window before the cooks door was pulled open and the massive orange face of Franky was sticking itself inside "whoa guys, what the hell happened here?" Sanji pushed Franky out of the way as he climbed out of his seat "Law decided to play a fucking stupid prank on us" he said in pure loathing. Zoro got out of the car as well retrieving his precious swords from under his seat. The bag was still mostly cream but hadn't fully escaped the blue dye attack; particularly on the end that was nearest to his feet. "Law did this?" Franky pursued eyes widening as he took in more of the car "man, that's just not cool". "No it's not 'cool'" Sanji sarcastically replied "Franky can you help clean us up?" he asked earnestly. Franky stood contemplating this, eyeing the almost completely blue cook and the half blue swordsman by rubbing one of his huge plate sized hands on his bazaar zigzag chin. "Hmm, you guys should come to the house I'm opening up in an hour". Franky finally concluded and with that he turned in his lime green flip-flops and marched out of the warehouse followed by his bedraggled crewmates.

After walking round a neat courtyard bordered with a variety of different grasses and precisely placed driftwood, they came to the back of the stone living quarters. "Hold on guys" Franky stalled them holding out his bulky arms so they couldn't entre the property "I'm going to have to ask you to strip". Zoro and Sanji stopped to just stare at him "Hey guys, don't give me the puppy eyes, you're no good at it anyway. I don't want blue stuff all over my house dudes, even if blue is a truly awesome colour. Oww!" Franky finished his statement by dragging a hand through his quaffed light blue tresses. "Franky, I'm not wearing underwear; can't I just roll my trousers up?" Zoro enquired not even fazed. "Whoa bro, too much information!" Franky exclaimed "Yeah I guess you can roll 'em, no one wants to see your junk after all" Sanji just laughed. "No one wants to see yours either Franky but you don't give anyone the choice do you?" Zoro retaliated referring to Franky's horrible orange unnecessarily tight hot pants, which made the cook laugh even more as he unbuttoned his shirt. "Aww man, that's cold bro!" Franky whined "although it is totally true, oww!" Franky posed flexing his arm muscles and thrusting his hips, which both Sanji and Zoro averted their eyes from.

Once they were stripped as much as possible; Sanji in his boxers, white skin with blue face and hands and Zoro in his rolled up trousers blue back of the head and streaked arms. "Whoa, that stuff transfers easily" Franky remarked after witnessing Zoro increasingly get covered in blue just by rolling his trousers up. "Mozu, Kiwi" Franky bellowed into the house "could you bring some plastic bags to the back door?" This prompted Sanji bolt round the side of the house, "eh, where you going bro?" When no answer was received from the cook Zoro offered "he won't want to be seen by the girls in his current attire, most likely". Franky nodded understanding that that probably was the case just as one of the twins, Zoro really couldn't find anything to tell them apart, came to the door with a handful of bags.

"Franky here are the bags, oh hi Zoro, what happened to you?" Either Mozu or Kiwi asked taking in the sorry sight of swordsman and blue. "Law decided to prank the cook and me" Zoro offered as an explanation to the slim twin still in her pyjamas. "Law did? Sanji's here?" the twin looked around confused. "Hey, Kiwi sis" Franky interrupted "why don't you and Mozu go and get changed, Sanji bro will stay in hiding if you remain here and I don't want him scaring the neighbours". Kiwi pouted slightly but handed the bags over and vanished into the house once again no further questions asked. "Right Zoro bro put the stained clothes in here" Franky held open large pink bag and Zoro proceeded to dump the soiled clothes into it. "Leave your shoes there" Franky further instructed "we should be able to clean those up, right, SANJI!" Franky shouted "The coast is clear!" As Zoro looked for an approaching semi naked cook he felt that the chaos was starting to settle again "Thanks Franky, you're a life saver" Zoro grumbled out. "Hey man, no worries, you've got to help your brothers out you know" Franky gushed with a serious expression "Law, it totally on my un-cool list now". Zoro had to smile; Franky had some strong dedication to his friends, it was really admirable.

When the cook eventually wandered back after checking that the girls really weren't anywhere in sight they were eventually allowed inside with specific instructions not to touch or go near anything. Franky guided them to a huge bathroom on the first floor that was completely covered in pristine white waterproof tiles. The bathroom / wet room had a Jacuzzi bath on one corner, while the left wall was dominated by a glass partitioned walk in shower with five large shower heads set and angled at different levels. The whole thing could probably shower four people and a child at once. The rest of the room was filled with sleek black marble fixtures and a huge mirror on the rear wall while tiny lights almost completely covered the ceiling making the windowless room seem brighter then natural light outside.

Franky visibly relaxed after they made the journey to the bathroom successfully without streaking blue down his furniture or hallways. "Okay guys, there are towels in the cupboard over there and some soaps and stuff" Franky pointed to the right "put the rest of your clothes in this bag when you strip down, I'll see if I can find something for you both to wear" Franky explained. "Thanks Franky" the cook spoke up "I appreciate your help but I really don't want any of your ridiculously tiny shorts or loud Hawaiian shirts to wear" Franky started checking at his pink, yellow and green shirt as if to find anything wrong with it "do you have anything else?" Sanji ventured, trying to not sound as rude as he was actually being. "Well Sanji bro, you just don't have any style" Franky claimed, which made the cooks expression sour in seconds "I'll see what I can find though, I mean, you're a lot smaller then me as well". That made the cook even angrier even though Franky didn't say it in a malicious way, just matter of fact. Franky was a muscular, bulky guy whereas the cook was toned but skinny, Zoro just stayed silent preying the cook wouldn't go on another tantrum.

Luckily there was no need for damage control and Franky left the room signing happily extremely loudly, he wasn't a bad singer, he played guitar too but he wasn't really a patch on Brook. The cook had collected a pile of soaps and switched on the shower that was for all five shower heads. "Marimo, will you let me know if I get all of the blue off?" Sanji asked which Zoro agreed to as the both stepped into the wet room instantly beginning a trail of bright blue water to the plug hole.

It took ages, the damn blue stuff was a lot trickier to remove from their skin then they first hoped. The cooks face although back to a more normal colour was bright pink from all of the scrubbing done to it. Even Zoro was looking patchy red from all the work he had to do on his arms and legs and his ears were killing him as he probably had to remove eight layers of skin just to get the damn stuff off with the cooks help using a nail scrubber. However, it certainly felt good to be clean again and Franky's towels were deliciously soft and fluffy against their raw skin. Zoro walked to open the door as the cook refused in case Mozu or Kiwi were anywhere nearby to see him not fully dressed. He was greeted with another large bag left just outside, on the floor; filled with mixture of clothing and flip flops. Dragging it inside Zoro and Sanji began to rummage through the items of shorts and shirts grimacing at each new garment pulled out.

After what felt like another ridiculously long time the cook had decided his best option was a really revolting polo shirt and knee length short combo in a dark red with green and gold leaf patterns. In some respect Zoro was quite envious because the cook had managed to find some shorts that fit him that weren't indecently tiny. Zoro was not so lucky and had on the shortest shorts, he felt almost exposed, but as the few slightly longer ones available felt like they wanted to escape up his bum crack whenever he moved, he didn't have much choice. He had teamed the cream short shorts with an orange shirt that had the least amount of Hawaiian print from the pile presented. Flip flips on they made their way back downstairs carrying the plastic carrier full of their previous ruined clothes only to be greeted by one of the twins. "Franky is opening up; do you guys want something to drink?" Sanji was at her side in the blink of an eye placing a kiss on her hand and spouting verbal rubbish. The twins were rare creatures that actually welcomed the attention though. "Yeah that would be good" Zoro answered the question loudly otherwise he wouldn't be able to get fully down the stairs for the next twenty odd minutes and there was no way he wanted to stand around listening to Sanji flirting for that long. Kiwi or Mozu nodded and led them to Franky's gadget filled kitchen of stone, slate and marble. Zoro tied a knot in the plastic bag so nothing could be contaminated by the blue stuff any longer; Sanji was already making tea so the twin wouldn't have to.

The twins were fairly odd looking women in Zoro's opinion and had some strange idolisation of Franky. It all started when Franky fixed their car on the side of road one time and asking for no payment in return. The twins then took it upon themselves to track Franky down so they could offer repayment for his good deed. Once they did, they brought Franky a massive cake shaped into his head, which Zoro just thought was weird. Franky, however, thought it was "Super" and hung out with them ever since. Now they worked for him and even lived in the same house but Zoro couldn't tell if it was all platonic or something more kinky. In fairness they both had great figures and who wasn't mildly curious about what it would be like to be with twins? But they had weird pointy noses and really nasally voices that could strip paint off the walls not to mention the frankly bazaar 80's type hair shaped into a square; you couldn't not look at it, much like Franky's metal nose. "Zoro, you like green tea don't you?" Kiwi or Mozu asked as she presented him with a steaming cup. He muttered thanks and turned to inspect his swords hoping they weren't contaminated from the blue and tried to ignore the background noise as much as possible.

At least an hour or so must have passed; Zoro was starting to feel quite hungry and very drafty. The cook must have been getting bored as well after the twin left to do actual work, which was why they were now walking to find Franky. After checking his studio only to find the twins in there on the phone they left to search the warehouse. Judging by the sound of tinkering when they entered and the occasional shout of "Super" their target was indeed located somewhere behind what looked like the beginnings of a ship. Weaving their way through bits of machinery, furniture and even sculptures they found Franky lathing an elaborate pattern into a plank of wood. "Franky" Sanji called "FRANKY" he then shouted after he went unheard over the lathe. Suddenly the noise ceased and Frank was looking at them both curiously. "Hey guys, whoa you both look super!" Franky enthusiastically replied giving two huge thumbs up. "Sanji bro, that one is special to me" Franky elaborated pointing towards the cook "I wore that to my old man's funeral". Franky welled up slightly but the cook looked horrified "You wore THIS to your father's funeral?" "Oh yeah" Franky sniffed "I got it specially made so I'd look more smart, you know. Anyway, it suits you bro! It doesn't fit me anymore, you should keep it" Franky chirped up smacking his large hand onto the unhappy cooks shoulder. Suddenly Zoro didn't think his indecent shorts were that bad anymore.

Franky agreed to fix up the cooks car, which helped substantially lift the cooks mood. It would, however, take about a week as Franky needed to order new air bags to be fitted. Also being the helpful man that he is; Franky was allowing them to use his pride and joy VW van to get home. This came with a number of conditions however, "don't get any scratches on my baby guys or dents because that would be so not super" Franky started. "Don't drive too fast in her, she's very delicate and don't slam the doors. In fact; I'm only going to allow Zoro bro to drive her, Sanji bro you sometimes drive too dangerously" And the cooks mood dropped again "don't get her messy, I don't want to be cleaning out food or whatever else, she should be respected". "Okay Franky, we'll take care of your 'baby'" the cook cut in losing patience yet again, Franky started welling up again, he was an emotional guy and he really did love that orange psychedelic eyesore of a van even though it was starting to rust in places. "We'll take care of her Franky and thanks for all of your help" Zoro took the offered keys and tried to placate the man.

Mozu and Kiwi trotted out holding their shoes, which were back to their normal colour; amazingly Zoro's boots were just as scruffy as before the paintjob. Hell knew what they had used to get that blue stuff off but it obviously worked better than regular soap and water. They offered up some socks and a different bag for Zoro to put his swords in then went to support Franky who was struggling to hold in his emotions. "Hey Franky" Zoro spoke up "I definitely owe you a few drinks for this" and showed one of his rare genuine smiles. "Oh hey bro, that would definitely be super!" Franky chocked out. "And I owe you meal fit for a king as well" The cook offered, which finally tipped Franky over the edge and his tears spilled out. "Aww, you guys are so super, I'm just glad to help! Now get out of here already so I can get back to work". Zoro and Sanji smiled at their friend and crewman, after putting on their normal shoes again they did just that. They made their way over to the VW camper van and climbed inside. Zoro started the engine as Sanji wound down the window. Franky was still huddled with the twins in tears but they were happy tears. As Zoro manoeuvred his way out, the cook bellowed "you're the best Franky!" out the window. As they lost sight of the hulking figure they could hear the returned remark "And you guys are SUPER!" echoing behind them. Mood on a high again the cook rolled the window back up to make a very welcome suggestion "Marimo, I'm starved, let's go and get something to eat".


	10. All Together Now

A/N. Sorry readers that I took such a long time to finish this chapter but it wasn't easy to write in my defense. Without further ado though, enjoy and comment if you wish.

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><p>Several weeks had passed since the meeting at Foxy's in which Zoro had won a Ferrari. Zoro didn't like all of the attention that the car brought whenever he drove it, so now Zoro pretty much hated the car altogether. Luffy found this particularly funny because everyone else had taken to calling Zoro a plethora or various insulting names for refusing to use it. Strangely, Sanji had taken to buying him dresses and sparkly bras instead, Luffy didn't grasp why but it would always create comical explosions of anger from Zoro. Luffy could understand Zoro's feelings though, he liked to keep to himself.<p>

Brook had discovered what Enel's project was, which disappointedly turned out to be nothing more than an expansion in his "exclusive" club to include dancing girls. Luffy didn't really understand the appeal of watching woman strip for a price but 'to each their own' as some say. As to why Enel was trying to get the funding from dodgy underground brokers rather than a bank however, no one really understood. Brook was still kind of on surveillance there just in case.

Several other ONE PIECE stories had been published including; Fullbody, a police chief pretending to be from the food standards agency and attempting to close down Sanji's restaurant with false claims that the food served was rancid. He was mad because Sanji flirted with his wife one evening when they had dined there but Fullbody stupidly decided to abuse the power of his badge and attempt to ruin someone's livelihood because of jealously. It's understood that Fullbody may be about to lose his job over the incident since ONE PIECE's publication because the police are so embarrassed by his actions.

Franky wrote an interesting article on scrap merchants who buy metal that has clearly been stolen from train lines or other public places and doing so because of gaps in the law, which could prevent this from happening. Current laws allow thieves and even some crews to get increasingly wealthier by simply stealing then selling public property. Since the publication it has been noted that the majority of scrap merchants have voluntarily applied stricter rules on what they will buy. The law however, will take time to change but at least the public have more awareness of the problem.

Robin and Chopper by far had the biggest breakthrough in discovering that the government were spending millions of people's tax money on a group of individuals called Black Cats. It was BC's job to tip the balance, or rig, any elections, even local government investment decisions in the favour of what current Minister President Edward Teach saw appropriate.

This was something Robin had been investigating for years, following the movements of Kuro, a man who had tried to silence one of her own historical discoveries before she joined the Straw Hats. Chopper managed to finally hack a number of revealing communications regarding what Kuro was asked to achieve directly for Teach himself. The heavy accusations published have since exploded across world media. Headlines of Teach's alleged corruption has aroused mass anger from the public and has left him in some seriously hot water. Shank's was doing his best in hiding ONE PIECE's location; they had angered a lot of powerful people.

Despite all of what was happening though Luffy felt detached from it all. His mind was struggling to engage in anything other than the new discoveries surrounding Ace's death. He had sent both Nami and Usopp on surveillance around the West Docks in Orange Town for the last two weeks. So far they had gained nothing significantly more revealing then what Lucci had told them at Foxy's.

Buggy's crew or possible simple lackeys; were regarded as nothing more than a nuisance to the dock workers and wandering passerby. More noise than anything threatening, most people just seemed to ignore them. Indeed the worst thing reported about them in the last two weeks was when some kids wanted to touch a chopper style motorbike they owned; when the crew refused, they chased the kids off by doing nothing but revving their engines. Buggy himself, however, had not been seen at all.

Nami had the surprise ability of being able to steal items completely unnoticed, even by Usopp, who had been stood next to her while she did it. Nami had successfully mapped every detail of the dock area, the details you don't get from google maps. She also managed to bring back one of the crews phone, a passport belonging to someone named Seymour Cabaji and a laptop that contained several messages between Buggy and someone called Alvida.

Robin and Nami were both going through all the messages and devices in more detail while Chopper had taken over stripping the gadgets whole in case anything was hidden somewhere on them that Luffy didn't understand. So far nothing seemed particularly significant though.

Although Luffy appreciated everyone doing their bit to help him out, there was a part of him that didn't want it. This investigation was very personal to him; Ace was his brother, not theirs and in some ways it was like his friends were opening old wounds and emotions with each new discovery made. Luffy would admit to crying for several hours with Makino when he presented the found hat to her but he knew deep down that he had to continue moving forward to help him find some closure.

The intercom from Sanji suddenly announced that dinner was ready, which sharply withdrew Luffy from his thoughts. Shooting away from the jobs board he continually pressed the elevator button, which was always ridiculously slow in his opinion. Luffy would admit to not really caring that he was jabbing his elbow constantly into Brook's gut in the process.

When the door finally opened; Brook, Chopper and himself lurched forward suddenly from the pressure that Franky's body mass had been pressing against all their backs with, in the usual great rush to get food. Although it caused poor Chopper to fall over and Brook to crush against the back wall, Luffy felt it was more important to jab his finger continually on the button for the third floor so he could hurry to where he could eat.

The short journey to the upper floor was always tedious for Luffy but he took this time to prepare for his game with Sanji of 'what he could grab to eat before he had to sit down and wait for everyone to be seated to continue his fill'. Pushing Franky out of the way when the doors dinged open creating a shriek of "Whoa Bro!" from said man; Luffy sped as fast as he could round the kitchen to the table already filled with delicious meats.

Spotting Sanji's angry face and a ready spatula by the centre of the table on the right side, Luffy spontaneously decided to leap from the end of the table and handspring to the left. Sanji had cleverly placed all of the food right at the head of the table furthest away from him, no doubt to try and foil his attempts for as long as possible. After a second long standoff where they both eyed the other down, Luffy began his assault.

His initial snatch attempt was thwarted by an equally quick strike by Sanji's spatula slapping his hand back but his other hand dodged underneath and managed to grab a chicken drumstick, a victory if only a small one. Sanji's face darkened some more as Luffy downed his prize immediately and spat out the bone. Sanji would be using his legs next, Luffy could tell by his posture, meaning Luffy only had a tiny window to grab something else before he would be kicked clear out of the room.

If there was one thing Luffy was unmatched at, it was his speed. Even though Sanji was good competition, he just didn't quite match up. Luffy smirked as he eyed his opponent down once again. It was Sanji who started this time, Luffy had to spin right to avoid Sanji's powerful left heel in his face. Taking advantage of the brief break it took Sanji to gear his leg up to jab at him again, Luffy dived for the plate of bacon. His fingers brushed the edge of the plate at the same time he could feel the rush of air ruffling his hair from the decent of Sanji's leg into the back of his skull.

Somewhere in the background a wail could be heard but Luffy concentrated on the quickest dodge he was capable of to escape with his life and the bacon. Projecting himself to the head of the table by the mere tips of his fingers, he locked the plate protectively to his stomach and relied on the momentum of his speed to land back on his feet.

Hearing Sanji's repressed anger, a soft thud, Franky's extra loud "Oww!", noticing that he had won the plate of bacon and landed on his feet as hoped, Luffy turned with his victory grin and tipped the entire stacked pile of meaty goodness into his mouth before anyone else could swipe it.

Upon closer observation while he was chewing he noticed that Sanji's left heel was imbedded into one of Franky's huge fists that was turning an alarming shade of scarlet on the table top. "Don't destroy this table dude with your freaky legs" Franky was admonishing a stunned Sanji "This is a 'one of a kind' piece". Luffy swallowed just as they both turned on him with varying degrees of annoyance etched on their faces.

"Luffy bro!" Franky said sounding exasperated "don't go eating all of the food, that's for everyone to share. You guzzling everything in sight just isn't cool". Luffy might have felt a slither of guilt as Franky sighed and then moved to a seat further down the table shaking his hand, which was certainly going to bruise.

Chopper and Brook had sat quietly and were chatting amicably at the opposite side from Franky as they started moving food away from him and closer to their end of the table. Luffy moved to take his usual seat at the head of the table accepting his fate of the now empty plate of bacon being violently swung into his face by an irritated Sanji; it beat being kicked out after all.

After his usual funny stomping and cursing, Sanji brought out more amazing looking dishes, which Luffy knew he couldn't touch until Sanji said so if he wanted to eat at all. In walked Zoro and Robin who took their usual seats in a calm manner that Luffy could never understand. Could they not smell the meat at all? Some of his friends were just plain weird. "Luffy, you have a bit of blood here" Zoro informed him pointing just below his own nose, Zoro looked quite tired for some reason but Luffy wiped at his face to remove the bit of blood with his sleeve as instructed.

The ping of the elevator and a rush of feet soon had everyone's attention turning to some slightly out of breath new comers. "We saw him!" Nami burst out excitedly, "we saw Buggy" Usopp clarified between heavy breathing."You will not believe how freaky looking he is!" Nami continued staring earnestly into Luffy's face. "He has some kind of warehouse a few streets away from the dock" Usopp cut in with his bit of information. "He has blue hair!" Nami pointed out in clear disgust; screwing her pretty face up all in quick succession.

"Whoa sister" a voice cut through, which sounded like the biggest stereotype of a surfers voice Nami had ever heard. "I'll have you know that blue hair is very sexy". She turned to the source of the voice to see a ridiculously tanned, bulky guy in an open Hawaiian shirt stroking a huge red hued hand through a quiff of sky blue hair. He had strange down pointy eyelashes but by far the oddest thing was the fact that his nose was made out of metal.

"Ah Miss Nami" Robin piped in "you have not yet met Franky and Brook have you?" she said as calmly as ever. "The blue haired man pouting before you is Franky, he is the carpenter I told you about although in reality he is also somewhat of an inventor". Franky took the opportunity to pose, flexing his arm muscles and shouting "super" while everyone's attention was on him.

"And this is Brook" Robin swiftly moved on, ever able to ignore the absurd, gesturing to a thin pale man with the biggest afro Nami had ever seen. "He's a musician and assassin" Robin finished with a subtle but definitely creepy smile. Brook stood and bowed to Nami who was both stunned by his immense height and the fact that she was being introduced so casually to an assassin.

"Yo ho ho ho ho ho" a musical laugh emanated from the man "now that is not quite true, I am more of a spy I would say". Brook had a somewhat distinguished dandyish voice and appeared to have gentlemanly manors, gesturing for one of Nami's hands then giving the back a light kiss. Sanji raved in protest, ignored, in the background from the motion. "I am a musician though, yo ho ho" Brook moved to take his seat once again, that's when Nami noticed that he was blatantly freely staring at her chest with a disturbing happy look on his face.

Crossing her arms purposefully over her cleavage Nami turned back to Franky "ehh sorry, I meant no offence" she said a little sheepishly. "Oww, that's okay sis, it's good to finally meet you anyway" Franky blared loudly, presenting one of his massive palms for her to shake. "I guess me and Zoro bro are a little freaky looking" he contemplated while they exchanged greetings earning a glare from the swordsman and a laugh from Sanji.

"Oi Usopp sit your arse down we're about to eat" Sanji spat startling the easily spooked sharpshooter who was hovering at the end of the table. "Nami my dear, please do take a seat for dinner" Sanji quickly swooned and spun around eventually pulling a chair out next to Franky for her. "Yeah guys we need to eat!" Luffy threw in his protestation, he hated his meals being delayed or interrupted. The fact that Nami and Usopp had found Buggy still wasn't an excuse for denying him food, it could be discussed later.

Sanji thankfully quickly relented and everyone was allowed to enjoy the meal, which seemed to be doubly more violent than usual with the full house of diners. Luffy gave a satisfied burp once he'd cleared the majority of the meat off the table and observed that most of his friends and crew were showing signs of a satisfied food coma as well. "Right everyone, we'll discuss Nami's and Usopp's information in the lounge" Luffy confirmed, earning a number of lazy nods.

"I have a number of photos to show so I'll set them up on the TV; it'll take a few minutes" Usopp spoke over the drags of chair legs on the wood beam floor. "Marimo! You're helping me with the washing up" Sanji called to the retreating swordsman who physically slumped upon hearing his fate. Luffy laughed and patted him on the back as he passed by to get to the lounge, he did feel sorry for Zoro at times.

Sanji never allowed him to help do the washing up any more; in fact Luffy was banned from the main kitchen, which he did think was a bit unfair. He'd only broken a few plates and he could control his appetite at times, if forced. Because Sanji also refused to let the woman help out, although he had to relent occasionally when Robin sometimes got really angry about it, the only people who helped were Zoro, Usopp and Chopper on a regular basis. Franky and Brook would sometimes assist in the clean up but they hardly ever stayed over to eat. Sometimes it was cool to eat downstairs at Makino's bar if Sanji was busy, then they could all eat as many hot wings as they wanted without getting told off.

Luffy consciously tried not to think about hot wings anymore so he wouldn't become hungry quickly again, Sanji really hated that. He turned into the lounge, a spacious room with high ceilings and a huge patterned grass green rug on the floor that Franky lay down before they moved in. Luffy made his way to his favourite chair, a white fluffy sheepskin armchair that he'd had since he was a kid with Makino. Everyone else thought it was pretty ugly but it was the most comfortable chair Luffy had ever sat in; he loved it so much that he had named it "Merry" after a ram he saw on a school trip once, which had really cool horns.

Luffy smiled at the memory as the rest of the team came in and lounged on the numerous other black and brown leather sofas. They were all looking uncomfortably full, Franky was even yawning as he prodded at his bruising hand. Usopp, however, was full of energy and connecting a load of 'things' to the big TV in the corner.

Luffy wasn't massively interested in the latest technology gadgets, he liked seeing what they could do, just wasn't interested in the science behind it but it seemed to really excite Usopp, and Chopper too. Luffy admittedly would be lost without their help on getting ONE PIECE's message out to the public. His greatest concern was that everyone stayed safe and they couldn't get tracked, he trusted them to a great extent.

"Right, ladies and gentleman" Usopp proudly announced once he'd finished fiddling with the TV. The screen was now filled with a picture of the dock area in Orange Town. Usopp and Nami must have had to get up somewhere high to take the shot because it was looking down on a number of shipping crates. Everyone sleepily focused their attention towards Usopp as he positioned himself beside the TV, back straight, chest out.

"As you all should know, Nami and myself were sent on the mission to find out more about Buggy and Buggy's Clowns" Usopp cleared his throat before continuing. "This was not an easy mission and at times it was very dangerous". "Really?" Chopper spoke out with a look of awe on his face, Luffy got excited too, Usopp could always tell good stories.

"Oh yes!" Usopp enthused "there were several moments when Nami and I had to use our best escape tactics to avoid detection from Buggy's crew" Usopp began to act out his tactics. "One group in particular were a very nasty bunch, they used the shipping containers for punching and kicking practice. One guy, who must have been at least 8 feet tall and was built as a wall of muscle, could punch right through the thick steel without getting a single scratch on his fist. I'm sure he knew we were following him because he would always turn and scan the direction we were hidden in".

Nami rolled her eyes as Usopp continued to exaggerate the few crew members they actually came across, they certainly didn't creep around or hide either. Most Buggy crew members they encountered were either asleep or just sitting round looking bored. You could always tell who they were as they all had paint on some part of their face. "Usopp, why don't you just show the photos" Nami suggested, which was met with a general murmur of agreement, with the exception of Chopper, Luffy and Usopp himself who all visually deflated slightly.

"Ri-right well" Usopp cleared his throat once again and stood up a little straighter "I have got a few photos of the area where we saw Buggy today, including some photos of Buggy himself, he is certainly, erm, unusual looking and that's coming from me!" This earned a loud chuckle from Robin followed by Luffy who got the "unusual looking" reference a few seconds afterwards. Everyone else just stared at the TV, which made Usopp look a bit embarrassed that his joke didn't go down as well as he hoped.

"Okay, so this picture shows where the more residential area of Orange Town begins, east from the main docks. You can see there are still a few factories and warehouses scattered around" Usopp picked them out using a laser pointer "here is where a group of fairly new build flats begins" Usopp pointed towards the edge of the screen before clicking the next image along on the remote control, which showed the flats a bit more clearly.

Clicking the next image along "Nami has this whole area mapped out now" Usopp gestured to the screen "There are actually a number of access points to the river, south from these three warehouses here that you wouldn't find on a normal map". Usopp clicked through a series of photos showing the mentioned access points to the river/estuary, The Orange Channel, through a number of courtyards and driveways.

"When we were looking round the last of the three warehouses on the river front" Usopp clicked back to the first wider image "this appears to be warehouse for plumbing materials" Usopp circled the building in question with the pointer."We noticed that there was quite a large group of Buggy's crew lounging about when we closer" Usopp then clicked forward to a set of photos with slim snippets of crew members in them, obviously taken from a poor perspective, probably so they weren't discovered.

"The crew members that hang around the docks are usually only in groups of four or five at the most but here there was quite a number of them. It wasn't obvious why though because as I said the warehouse here was full of plumbing pipes, fixtures and fittings" Usopp then gestured to Nami "Nami suggested we use the fire exit steps on the building to get a better view point and because we couldn't get very near without being spotted."

Everyone's attention was momentarily diverted as Zoro strolled into the room looking triply more tired than he did after dinner. He slouched into an armchair and raised a large bottle of whiskey to his lips just as Sanji walked in sighing loudly in a huffy way before taking a seat next to Brook and folding his arms across his chest looking angry. The deathly silence and purposeful attention on Usopp from the pair led everyone else to understand that they had probably had another fight.

Usopp forced himself not to roll his eyes "So anyway" he tried to get back to where he was before the room was plunged into an awkward silence "Nami and I went up the fire escape". Usopp clicked forward to the next image and finally got a reaction. The photo showed a crowd of Buggy crew members lounging around beside the Orange Channel. The surprising thing being the sheer number of them, there were at least a hundred men and woman there.

"Who the hell is this Buggy guy? Franky questioned out loud "I mean, I'd never heard of him before three weeks ago and yet he has this many followers? seems weird guys". "I agree" Brook added "in all of the infiltration jobs I've done in my time, I've never heard any mention of him". Luffy frowned at this new information; he didn't really care if no one had heard of Buggy he still planned on kicking the guys arse.

"It doesn't matter guys" Luffy spoke out "from the reports I've heard both from Usopp and Nami then previously from Lucci and Kaku; despite the numbers in his crew, although surprising, they don't seem to be all that skilled at, well, anything. Usopp, what else did you find out?"

"Right, well" Usopp clicked onto the next image "So Nami and me were just as shocked to see so many people but we then managed to get on the roof of the plumbing warehouse and that's when we discovered this". Usopp gestured to a long, flat, cream coloured warehouse/storage building on the TV screen.

The small warehouse was low built, probably no taller than a garden shed, which is probably why it couldn't be seen from the main road or beyond the plumbing warehouse. It was situated between the Channel and a high wall that stretched out of the picture. The wall appeared to be a separation between the commercial buildings and the beginning of a public footpath; however it hid the cream building behind it perfectly.

"While we were on surveillance we noticed that this small motor boat was approaching" Usopp continued, clicking though a number of photos showing a smallish red and white boat approaching, manned by four crew. "When it came to dock outside the cream warehouse this funny looking man stepped out flanked by three men to greet the newcomers, I think we both knew at once that this was Buggy the Clown".

Everyone stared confused momentarily at the screen. The guy who was flanked was actually wearing an old bicorn hat; the type of hat normally associated with pirates in old films, only it was orange and had blue tassels on it. He did have blue hair, very long blue hair that was tied back into a ponytail.

Those in comparison to the rest of him, however, seemed normal. He had a large bulbous nose that was painted red, a tattoo over his forehead and eyes of some crossed bones and he had purposely painted a huge smiling mouth surrounded by red lips on the lower part of his face. Lower down he appeared to be wearing a nautical stripped onesie and some green clown shoes. "Told you he was freaky looking" Nami stated matter of factly to the silenced room.

"Well, his, erm, 'lifestyle' choices aside, what was he actually up to here?" Sanji asked which seemed to stir everyone again, away from the TV screen. "Nothing much" Nami answered first "all he did was greet the men on the boat and then they unloaded some crates and took them into his warehouse thing. We don't know what they contained, they were just plain wooden crates. They couldn't have been anything very heavy or precious or expensive because the men on the boat were just tossing them onto shore".

"Hmm, yeah, Usopp picked up "Buggy didn't stick around long either. All he did was scan the grounds looking peeved, we assumed at some of his crew, and then went back inside flanked by the same men as before. We're guessing that the men guarding him are probably his 'real' or most trusted crew members". Nami agreed by nodding her head "one of them was the owner of that passport I nabbed earlier, Seymour Cabaji".

"Okay" Luffy interrupted the few murmurs that were starting to build as his friends started to ask questions amongst themselves. "I wouldn't normally suggest this as there are far too many things we still don't know but I can't wait any longer. We need to go to this warehouse of Buggy's and question him, with force if necessary, what he knows directly about Ace".

That seemed to silence the room but Luffy saw a couple of his friends nod their heads in agreement. "I want this to be a team effort; you've all got involved in Ace's case so I want you all there with me". Luffy elaborated "You've seen the numbers in his crew, Robin, get Law involved in this too. We need his help".

"Yes Sir" Robin replied but this was slightly overshadowed by Sanji's protestation of "not that son of a bitch!" while he flared with anger. "Sanji bro, I know the dude did a number on your car but he is quite handy to have around in a fight" Franky pointed out, trying to be reasonable. "He's more trouble then he's worth, we don't need him, I can easily beat up all of those shitty lackeys on my own" Sanji both boasted and fumed.

"This isn't open for debate Sanji" Luffy replied in all seriousness. "Whatever issues you have with him, put them behind you now! This mission or any ONE PIECE business for that matter comes before personal grudges". Again the room was silenced, Luffy easily commanding so when he got resolute. The majority of the occupants were always slightly taken aback by his serious attitude when it happened because Luffy's character was usually so flippant.

Sanji growled to himself and got out of his seat to pace out his frustrations. Brook, who never much understood the chef's emotions asked "Well Luffy, what exactly is the plan then?" everyone shifted to sit forwards as if somehow they would be able to hear better by moving forwards a few inches. Really it was to anticipate their involvement in what Luffy loosely had planned for them.

Luffy sat back; placing his straw hat over his eyes he silently planned out what he believed to be the best course of action. The room around him was silenced, the only noise coming from Sanji's angry pacing and the occasional glug of liquid escaping a bottle and into Zoro's mouth.

"Well to control the sheer amount of Buggy's crew we need our defence team" Luffy smirked. "Franky, Usopp, Chopper, I'll need you to keep the bulk of the crew away from Buggy". This was met with determined nods and the odd flex of arm muscle. "Usopp you know how they behave best so strategise with Franky and Chopper on the best approach". "Yes sir!" Usopp saluted and walked across the room to sit next to the bulky carpenter.

"Sanji, Zoro, Robin, you will accompany me on targeting Buggy directly" Luffy explained with purpose as they all focused their attention on him. "Robin, I'll need your questioning skills" the woman smiled subtly making the rest of the room with the exception of Nami squirm with unpleasant thoughts. "Zoro, Sanji, I want you to keep Buggy's closest, those guys who were flanking him, out of the way". Sanji humphed but nodded, the swordsman just lazily carried on drinking without reaction. Luffy knew this meant that Zoro would follow so was satisfied enough to move on.

"Brook, Nami, I want you on the outskirts looking out for anything else arriving or leaving. You're going to be our eyes from above, get to high location and guide us to where we need to be" Nami looked across to the tall perverted man and made a note to cover up that night "I know just the place" she spoke up thinking of one Usopp's and hers observation spots.

"Good" Luffy nodded satisfied "finally we'll get Law to help us with some of his potions; I've heard he has a truth serum and some other stuff". Both Sanji and Zoro reacted to this news, Sanji stopped pacing as a mild look of what seemed to be horror flitted across his face. Zoro meanwhile shifted in his seat suddenly looking more awake then he had done for past hour.

"Luffy, I wouldn't rely too much on Dr. Death's experiments" Zoro's low baritone filled the room "they're effective but don't always have the desired results" he subtly warned. Luffy nodded, he knew Zoro and Sanji had both been sent as guinea pigs for Law's experiments but they mostly seemed fine. "Okay, but if he's with the four of us he wouldn't do anything stupid" Luffy decided but didn't miss the hard look that passed between Zoro and Sanji when he said this.

"If there are no objections I suggest that we don't delay and get moving tomorrow night" Luffy asked. After looks were exchanged around the room no objections were heard. "Great, Robin get on the phone to Law and tell him to be ready at 22:30. Everyone else, do what you do best" Luffy smiled.

The room started to fill with chatter once again as his crew began to discuss what it is they needed to do. Luffy could feel the stirrings of excitement build in his gut; he was going to finally find out what happened to Ace. He had a loose plan but his friends always came through. Buggy the Clown was going down.


	11. To Get Things Started

A/N It's the beginning of the end folks, thanks for keeping with me.

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><p>A pair of big brown eyes stared glazed and unfocused at a blob of a man who had been snoozing for the last hour at least. Nami doubted that a stacked pile of scaffolding poles were the most comfortable of sleeping spots but apparently if you're tired, or perhaps in this case, bored enough, anywhere will do.<p>

Stretching out her limbs as much as she could from within a cramped partly crushed vehicle mysteriously dumped on top of a postal building just behind the shipping yard, she reluctantly carried on her observation of Orange Town docks.

Nami had been here for the most part of the day, her job being to watch the area in case anything occurred that would prevent tonight's raid from happening. Buggy's crew, however, appeared to be going out of their way to be even less interesting than usual and she was developing some seriously stiff muscles from being sat down for so long.

Brook had joined her just after five, apparently the man didn't generally get up until about two in the afternoon, or so he felt the need to explain once he had found out that she had arrived around midday. That combined with him not so subtly asking if he could get a peek at her underwear "if she wasn't busy" resulted in one peeved as all hell red haired woman.

Nami had ordered Brook to observe from the roof of the residential flats at the other side of the warehouses. Partly so he could provide a different viewing perspective but mostly to get him the hell away from her. Brook certainly didn't lavish an uncomfortable amount of over the top attention on her like Sanji did, at least when you said no, he'd leave it. His laugh, however, soon began to irritate every last one of her nerve endings after a couple of hours of his company.

That was a good three hours ago now though, the sun had fully set and the time was approaching when everyone else was supposed to show up. Chopper had provided them all with short-range radios to communicate with but Nami also had her phone on her for contact with HQ. Robin informed her at least twenty minutes ago that they had all set off so they should be here at any moment.

"Brook" Nami spoke into her radio. After several seconds silent pause her device started to pick up the telltale background noise of a connected line. "Yes Nami, are you okay?" Brook responded slightly high-pitched. "Yes, I'm fine, I was just wondering if you'd heard anything from Luffy or anyone". A slightly longer pause followed this and Nami found her eyes wandering to the sleeping blob man once again.

"Well my dear, I do believe I have just spotted Zoro's new car approaching from the main road junction. Yo ho ho ho ho ho, ah there is Franky's love mobile as well" Brook eventually responded suddenly sounding a lot more jovial.

Nami physically face palmed. Out of all of the vehicles the Straw Hat's owned between them; they decided to pick the two that were the most unique and noticeable. Nami heard the Ferrari before she saw it; the engine was ridiculously loud, easily echoing off all the surrounding buildings. The previously sound asleep blob man from before was now half awake and craning his neck to see what was going on.

"Why the hell did you bring the Ferrari you complete green haired idiot?" Nami found herself screeching into her radio as Zoro came in range. His car suddenly came to an abrupt stop at an awkward angle two warehouses up from where Buggy's was. Franky's orange eyesore followed next to it and then Robin's far more sensible black Mini that Nami had only just taken notice of.

"Shut up witch!" came the eventual acid reply from the swordsman "you've been giving me shit for weeks that I don't use this car, then when I do use it, I get called an idiot, fuck you". Sanji's furious protestations on how Zoro should and should not talk to woman were quickly heard in the background but Nami ignored it. "You are an idiot! Thanks to that thing everyone in this entire area now knows we're here and that's not a hard car to forget! What if it gets damaged? You're such a moron!"

The bickering continued over the radio until Luffy's laughter was heard the loudest and clearest over all other communications. "Don't worry guys, it doesn't matter if people know we're here we'll get want we want anyway" Luffy assured. "Actually it would have been beneficial and likely quicker if we had been a little more inconspicuous" a deep sleepy voice cut in. Nami assumed this to be the Trafalgar Law they had all been talking about.

"If it didn't matter if you got noticed or not, why the hell did I have to be on observation all day?" Nami screeched, her anger raising a notch by each idiotic sentence that came out of her teams' mouths. "Guys!" Brook urgently cut in "you've got a lot of company coming your way both from the docks and Buggy's warehouse".

These were the magic words that managed to focus everyone again and the radio went dead. Stepping out of the vehicles Nami could see that this was time to be a crew. Zoro was actually equipped with three katana blades; Usopp however had a whole arsenal of ammunition strapped across is body. Franky and Chopper appeared to be wearing metal gloves of some sort. Everyone else though just seemed normal.

"Okay, Sanji, Zoro, Robin, Law, you're with me" Luffy quickly gave orders. "Usopp, Chopper, Franky" Luffy addressed a sudden huge smile taking over his face "go and have some fun".

The team split suddenly, Luffy's group heading towards the mass of oncoming lackeys while the rest stayed around the cars. Usopp after quickly observing that most of Buggy's extras were coming from the warehouse near the waterfront quickly scrambled to the top of Franky's van. Picking up two flash pellets he yelled at the top of his voice "shade!" and launched the two little balls from his custom slingshot.

The effect was almost instant; all Straw hats either moved the heads away or stopped and shielded their eyes as the brightest and hottest of white lights exploded over the plumbing warehouse. The sound of shrieks and groans were heard almost instantaneous.

As soon as the majority of the red disappeared from behind his shut eyelids Usopp took a quick observation of the intensity of the light left over. After deeming it safe he bellowed "clear!" The Straw Hats moved once more, only now Luffy's team were easily passing all of the temporarily blinded Clown Crew with ease.

The light blast had definitely alerted the rest of Buggy's Clown crew, however, Usopp could see a mixture of face painted morons running towards them. There was a mixture of angry, confused and some fearful emotions flitting over their faces as they approached. "Right" Usopp addressed the other two who were getting into defensive stances. "Let's keep these guys away from Buggy's warehouse".

Sanji was helpfully kicking any stray people out of the way as they blindly stumbled about rubbing at their eyes. He was leading the way between the plumbing warehouse and public footpath soon followed by Luffy who was delivering a swift punch here and there when necessary. Buggy's crew were still groaning but then all of Usopp's special ammunitions were deadly in there own way. The light blasts had definitely saved them a lot of energy from not having to fight their way through to the warehouse but Sanji would guess that trouble wouldn't be far away.

Sanji vowed not to go too near to Law, he promised to himself that he wouldn't sabotage Luffy's mission tonight but he swore that Law was smirking at him whenever he happened to look in his direction. The bastard was flanked between the beautiful Robin and the idiot marimo head in an entirely stupid black and white, fluffy, spotty hat. He didn't know how the marimo could be so damn calm around him after what he did to them both.

His excess frustrations helped send one surprisingly burly guy back into an empty pile of stacked crates when he had reached the corner that turned to Buggy's crappy clapped out warehouse. The entire grounds in front of the entrance were littered with junk. Rusty bike wheels, broken ladders, dirty microwaves, and bits off boats, food waste, it was disgusting.

Just as predicted though here stood three guys who were looking far too relaxed considering crewmen who couldn't see properly surrounded them. The first was an overweight dark skinned man with an unfortunate monobrow and odd shaped goatee. His vest was perhaps a couple of sizes too small for him and he was not looking particularly pleased to see them.

The one in the middle by contrast looked almost malnourished; his face had a sunken quality with his cheekbones a little too prominent. His head was covered in a black beanie hat that had pompoms on it and a clown logo but it couldn't distract from the hard look he had in his eyes.

The last however looked like he'd rather be having a kip somewhere then be here. He was just an average build but obviously had very tight curly ginger hair that he had attempted to flatten into a centre parting. The result just reminded Sanji of some kind of russet coloured mushroom, a mushroom with thick lips that is.

"Who are these guys?" Law lazily enquired, Sanji could help but get annoyed just by his damn voice. "I don't know but they all look weird" Luffy unwittingly responded as he revoltingly started to pick at his nose.

"Stop that!" Sanji exasperatedly spoke as he lightly hit their idiot leader in the back of the head. The connection produced an "oof" but at least it had the desired effect in that Luffy was no longer picking his nose in front of the enemy. "They're clearly part of Buggy's crew if that one in the middle has a stupid clown motif sewn into his woolly hat" Sanji unashamedly pointed to the skinny guy in the middle.

"If you don't mind" the skinny guy spoke up in a surprising pronounced voice "Who the hell are you and what the hell do you want?" He didn't seem that affected by our apparent lack of interest in them but Sanji could see that the other two were both preparing to fight. The strain of a muscle here and there and a shuffle of foot to improve an offensive stance spoke volumes to him. The skinny guy clearly had the most confidence then, not correcting his stance at all and was probably the strongest of the three.

"I'm Monkey D Luffy of the Straw Hat crew and I've come to speak to Buggy the Clown" Luffy declared fairly unenthusiastically, Sanji concluded that Luffy clearly didn't rate these guys much. Luffy had a bit of an unexplainable talent there; he could always see through people, know instantly how talented and passionate someone was or someone who needed him, equally he knew when people weren't worth his time.

"The Straw Hats?" the skinny guy repeated looking puzzled, he shared this face with his subordinates who then simultaneously adopted the same gormless expression. Sanji was beginning to get impatient. "Yes we're the Straw hat crew, now who the fuck are you? Not that we really give that much of a shit but we'd like to move on before it fully becomes winter if that's alright with you".

Law could be heard sniggering but Sanji purposefully ignored it, more importantly he heard the distinct shink sound of one of Zoro's blades being released from its protective casing. The skinny guy seemed to notice as well and appeared to quickly become nervous. "We've never had any encounters before with your crew, why are you fighting us? Look we're just performers, we do the tightrope, and we're called the Funan Brothers"

"Oh you're part of a circus?" Luffy asked seemingly impressed, all three guys eagerly nodded as response. "Well, you're still in our way and these other guys are starting to come around" Luffy vaguely pointed to the not so blinded anymore mob that had been slowly creeping in position to surround them.

It was instantaneous, the Funan Brothers as they called themselves were suddenly looking triumphant, Sanji wanted to laugh; they honestly thought that they had got them. "Sorry" the skinny guy spoke again; the other two apparently were mute "Buggy won't be seeing you this evening".

Everyone launched at them, the shitty lackeys were closest to Sanji raising their fists ready to punch him in the face. He quickly dropped to a crouched position and kicked upwards into as many of the fuckers who dared come near him. They were soon staggering off with bloody noses, mouths or a now excruciating pain in their crotch; others had been clear knocked out.

He flipped to a handstand and did one of his signature moves, spinning on his hands, his legs split above, and Sanji ploughed his forceful appendages into the masses of Buggy's idiot crew. Sanji had some satisfaction when he heard the odd yell or the certain cracking of a bone but he was getting a few stray spots of blood on his suit and he hated that, blood was a nightmare to get out of fabric.

As soon as he'd created enough of a clearing Sanji flipped back onto his legs but quickly had to dodge out of the way as Law actually threw the ginger Funan Brother head first into a pile of boat parts just behind him. Sanji just knew that the bastard threw the weirdo mushroom head towards him on purpose. "Watch where you throw shit Law!" Sanji angrily bellowed, but the fucker just shrugged then punched some other face painted clown idiot.

Sanji wanted to, he wanted to so badly give Law a swift but extremely painful kick up the backside. He started bee lining to him; the cocky bastard had it coming. His momentum was disrupted however, when his vision was filled with green moss, which completely threw him off kilt startled. "Don't be an idiot cook; there is time later for that. Behind you!" Zoro growled low.

Sanji, reluctantly agreeing with the marimo swung his leg back in the direction that the swordsman was looking at. He soon felt a connection swiftly followed by an agonised "Oof". "Whatever marimo" Sanji half heartedly sneered, getting lectured by Zoro was the worst, mainly because he knew he was smarter than the swordsman so he hated looking like a fool in front of him.

Zoro was soon off again though whipping the chubby Funan Brother with the back of his blade. Sanji had been on the receiving end of that attack many times, it was severely painful and the whip marks usually lasted a week afterwards. The Funan Brother was stumbling about everywhere trying to avoid being hit, not realising that he was getting backed towards the water of the Orange Channel. Sanji almost, almost, felt sorry for the Funan Brother, Zoro wasn't even being remotely serious with him.

Sanji turned and quickly scanned the situation. Most of the lackey's appeared to either be down or were running away, some clearly injured. Robin, magnificently in her amazing beauty elbowed some disgusting creep out of the way then knocked him on conscious with the pile of other bodies surrounding her. "Rooooobin, my love, are you hurt at all?" Sanji leapt towards her ready to kiss any of her sores away if need be.

"I'm fine Mr. Cook" Robin gloriously spoke and even presented him with one of her most charming smiles. Sanji was momentarily in heaven, he could imagine when Robin and he became an item, she would be in control of course but oh how he would love to be controlled by such a woman. He sighed to himself in content but then noticed that Robin had walked off towards Luffy who had the skinny Funan Brother in a headlock and appeared to be using him as some kind of battering ram to get the warehouse door open.

Sanji approached the scene without much else to do now "you're really no fun" Luffy was saying as he forced the guy into the door again. The skinny guy was whimpering as he tried to speak, Sanji couldn't understand a word of it though. His attention was distracted behind him when a high pitched yelp was heard followed by a distinctive splash of something heavy being dropped into water.

The chubby Funan Brother was now splashing like mad in an attempt to swim away from the swordsman to the bank on the other side of the channel. Well, that was one swimming away, one sprawled out within the junk of the grounds and the other was getting his head smashed in by Luffy.

As the swordsman approached Luffy gave one more knock with the skinny guys head. It had the desired effect the door was opening. Just as they anticipated who was behind the door, Luffy dropping the no longer needed skinny guy who cowered away, arms protecting his abused head. A loud fearful shriek rang through the night air that belonged to no other then his beloved Nami.

The first people to attack them were the groups who normally hung around the dock area, rather than the warehouse. They were obviously far away enough at the time of the light blast not to get too effected by it. Most were running on foot but Usopp could hear the revving of a bike engine here and there between the shouts and battle cries. He had just the thing for them for when they decided to appear.

Franky and Chopper spread out, Franky went towards the oncoming mob from the dock and Chopper towards the idiots still trying to pour out from between the plumbing warehouse and footpath. Usopp remained on the top of Franky's van; here is where he was going to get the best aim for his shots.

"There are about thirty people heading your way Franky" Nami was saying through the radio "there are others still in the dock but they appear to still be asleep". "Oh, Chopper" followed Brook's dandy lilt "it would appear that Luffy's group is doing away with some of the crew but a lot are still stumbling your way. I might suggest that the flashier weapons you have Usopp are used sparingly so we do not wake the whole neighbourhood".

Franky hollered his signature phrase of "Super!" as he swung with his powerful arms into the first line of attackers. These guys by far looked the angriest but despite Franky not only towering above them in height he must have been about double the width compared to their average builds.

Franky in one right-handed strike completely floored four men at once. His specially adapted gloves of light but strong metal plating made him an even deadlier powerhouse than normal. The dock crews stalled their approach now, trepidation flittering across many faces as they sized up their opponent.

Some obviously didn't fancy their chances and tried to get at Chopper, who at a mere 5 feet tall obviously looked like the easier target. "Strong left!" Franky bellowed again, he always tended to name his fighting moves but as silly as that seemed he sent a further five men flying back in the direction they originally came from.

Usopp heeding Brook's advice quickly slipped on some latex gloves and retrieved some of his less conspicuous ammunition. He quickly aimed at a group who were trying to all round on Chopper, Chopper was a good fighter but too much opposition was just unfair after all.

He aimed at the nape of the neck of the first man in a group who were rushing past him to get to Chopper. Usopp had six pellets in his hand, one for each of them; no excess in case his misaimed. He let the first little pellet, white with flecks of grey in it go and struck the man closest to reaching Chopper then within second long gaps shot the rest into the surrounding group.

At first the group hesitated, hands going to the back of their necks and turning on Usopp in a mixture of annoyance and confusion. "Get him!" one of the central group shouted, he had messy dirty blond hair and was only in shorts and t-shirt despite the chilly night temperature. Usopp grabbed some of his slightly stronger ammunition, this time little pellets of a vivid red and quickly aimed towards the group as the dirty blond started climbing onto Franky's van hood.

Usopp didn't strike he was waiting. He kicked back grabbing hands, one almost tripping him up. He didn't want to waste his precious pellets, luckily the ones he was currently using were homemade, anything to avoid regular trips to Thriller Bark Cupcakes. The blond was on his feet now and heading straight for him. Usopp reluctantly let go of the red pellet right in the assailants face.

This time the effect was immediate. The dirty blond started screaming, high pitched and agonised screaming as he pitifully clawed at his eyes. Usopp kicked him back, knocking him off his feet the blond stumbled back grabbing at his face covered in a mixture of salt, pepper and Naga Bhut Jalakiya, the hottest chilli pepper in the world.

The others in the group appeared startled at first but then they started to jerk. A skinhead even looked like he was starting some kind of elaborate street dance. Then the scratching came and the often amusing oohing and ahhing facial expressions. The first pellet sent was doing its thing at last; it always took a bit of time to react, sending an irritating itch that heated the skin and felt impossible to quench. The more they wiggled about the further the bits of power would spread as well, these guys were no longer a threat.

Usopp started firing at will then, catching out the strays but making sure he aimed in places that were not near the rest of his friends. Buggy's crew were foolishly giving him a wide birth, seeing the crying and wiggling men surrounding him, but marksmanship was his greatest strength, his weakest close range combat. Usopp smirked; he was beginning to enjoy himself.

Chopper quickly noticed that most of the mass of Buggy's crew were heading towards him, some were still partially blinded and stumbled about, other were running away, he wouldn't stop the ones who wanted no part of this fight. Chopper was often conflicted when it came to fights, he was training to be a doctor after all, and generally he tried to avoid injuring people any more then scraped skin.

Unfortunately Chopper couldn't rely on the people surrounding him to have the same amount of compassion as he did. They were clearly the types of people who didn't like to play fair, Chopper knew he was short, even the shortest of his opponents still had a good five inches on him.

They were fools though, after all even Chopper himself started out in fight clubs like Zoro, Luffy and Sanji. In fact these places were where the majority of the team all met one another. Chopper had always been the odd one out; he was of a slight build and was smarter beyond his years, in other words a constant target for closed-minded bullies.

Chopper saw that the Buggy crew had formed a convenient semi-circle surrounding him, he kept Robin's car to his back and out of his peripheral vision he could see that Usopp was clipping off people here and there with his itching pellets. He could hear the heckles too but paid them no mind "shrimp", "easy pickings", "he's a child", "dwarf" nothing he hadn't heard before, Chopper was just waiting for one of them to move.

"I'll finish the brat!" a badly receded but clearly young guy eventually stepped forward cheered and laughed on by all the others. He wasn't even focusing on Chopper as he stepped closer; he was much interested in lapping up the attention he was getting. Big mistake, Chopper thought and he ran at him as the fool raised his fist to whoop at the crowd, his back almost completely towards him.

There were some intakes of breath, some attempted but too late shouts from the surrounding crew to try and warn the receding guy but Chopper was fast. As fast as Luffy could be and he leapt on him, swung to his front, grabbed his head in his hands and rammed his hard head violently into his startled victims face. Chopper heard a crunch and knew at once he'd broken the guy's nose cartilage. A trickle of guild creeped down his spine at that knowledge but Chopper knew he had to act fast if he didn't want to be ganged upon.

With the aid of the gloves that Franky had given him, they were surprisingly light and flexible considering they were made of metal and leather. Chopper struck fast, his palm heel dealing a strong blow to the receding guy's temple. Chopper leapt away and immediately started on the shocked gatherers who watched, as the person they were so sure would beat him up with ease was now passed out on the floor with a broken nose.

Chopper not only had his medical knowledge but he had also received martial art training in his early teens. He knew that as long as he dealt a controlled enough force into his opponent's facial vital points, he could deal enough of a shock to their brains that they would be unconscious within seconds. It was a technique that Robin used as well and often only resulted in minor damage if any.

Chopper was a scrappy fighter though. He ploughed into Clown Crew with fists, elbows, knees; whatever appendage was closest to dealing a blow. When he couldn't get a blow to the head, he went for the diaphragm or the inside of an upper leg. The crowd soon dispersed, a pile of them out cold on the floor, others limping or trying to gain breath away from him. Luckily, more and more people appeared to be running away, the ones still staggering through the passage between the plumbing warehouse and path clearly having had enough.

Chopper suddenly jumped; he'd been so concentrated on what he was doing that a motorbike passing him by less than two meters away filled him with enough freight that he could feel his heart beating through every bone in his body.

Usopp knew they would eventually come out; the annoying idiots had been revving their engines for the last ten minutes. A group of about twenty or so bikers spread out entering the area from various small paths from the dock area. They were currently circling in front of them as they still fought off those brave or stupid enough to keep attacking them. The noise was bound to attract unwanted attention though; they needed to be dealt with quickly.

"Franky!" Usopp yelled "get rid of the bikes, they're making far too much noise. I'll hit the ones further away" he directed. He was still positioned on top of the van, his hand wandering to some of the more dangerous pellets secured to a belt across his chest. As Franky whooped another "Super!" Usopp deftly tipped the pellets he needed into his hand without taking his eyes away from enemy.

"Chopper! I need you to watch my back while I take out the bikers" Usopp hollered to the other side of him. Franky was already punching one poor bastard right off his seat. The bike clattered to the floor and eventually came to a halt after scraping down the cracked tarmac less than a meter away from the back of Franky's van. Chopper saluted him and proceeded to give a longhaired man with his face fully painted like an eagle a dead leg.

Franky was battling the guy he'd just knocked off the bike. A slightly tougher opponent due to him being of a similar physique to Franky himself. Usopp let the first pellet fly; this one was one of his favourites but it was certainly best used at a distance. The tiny pellet struck the gas tank of his target, cracking on impact. It wasn't Usopp's best shot; he was hoping the windshield would be struck. None of them wore helmets, a stupid move for them but certainly advantageous for Usopp.

Smoke quickly erupted from the pellet shell; it had a greenish tinge to it and thickened in seconds towards the drivers face. Usopp could see that the driver was initially worried; perhaps hitting the gas tank was a stroke of luck, for he obviously thought there was something wrong with it. However, his face soon changed to one of disgust when a full plume of smoke entered his nose.

Usopp always enjoyed this part, he struck a few more machines, while the drivers were distracted by their crewmate retching and coughing trying in vain to get the disgusting smell of one of his stink blasts out of his system.

Soon it became a chorus, most hit drivers were coughing a couple had even been sick; about six had done what he had wanted though and driven off, trying to get away from the smell. His little pellets were sulphur-based chemicals comprising of five different ingredients to resemble the stink of rotting carcasses and human faeces. He had to make them away from HQ because everyone complained about the smell of them; it was worth it though for simply observing the faces of his victims twist in often-comedic discomfort.

While Usopp had been busy Franky had been so too. He'd done away with the first biker he had knocked down; pulling down his elasticated waist jogging bottoms at the same time lifting up his overly baggy shirt to blind him. A swift kick to his bottom and the guy was sprawled on his belly before he made a hasty retreat back to the dockyard completely humiliated.

Franky had damaged a few of the other bikes; he had sent his metal-coated fist into a few wheels that happened upon him a little too closely. One guy flew clean over his handlebars when his front wheel suddenly bent at about a 45° angle. A couple of others he'd clipped zigzagged off trying their absolute best to keep control of their machines.

He was becoming more than aware of what the remaining crewmembers had suddenly decided however. A few had run off only to eventually return holding objects from tree branches to car hubcaps, anything they could swing in the hope it would cause damage. Only Franky noticed that their direction was a little off, they were focused more to the right of him and he just instinctively knew that they were planning on trashing Zoro's Ferrari.

"Yo bros!" Franky quickly called out. "Help me get rid of these dudes with the makeshift weapons; they're going to smash the Ferrari". He could see that both Chopper and Usopp were startled by his news but he could also see that they were both still heavily engaged in their own battles. Franky made a quick decision "okay, you keep on doing your own things, just leave it to me bros but cover me if you can".

After receiving two determined nods, Franky ran to intercept the closest attacker who was flailing a brick about in a bazaar pattern that Franky had no idea where the brick might get flung. The attacker in a well-worn beanie hat had a look of determination on his face and Franky prepared to give a strong left hook in case he needed to batter the brick back as well as the guy wielding it.

Just as he was about to engage the attacker though the beanie hat wearer tripped over his own feet. Franky wasn't expecting it or the sudden release of the brick that sailed over the top of his head. The momentum he had prepared for his "strong left" ended up smacking beanie hat in the head rather than his gut as he toppled forwards.

Franky's attention was more on the brick however, his face dropping in horror as the brick flew in a true direction directly for the rear side window of Zoro's beautiful car.

"Gyaaaahhhhhhhh!"

A tremendous scream pierced the night air drowning out all scuffles, yells and bike engines. Franky along with everyone else turned in the direction the scream came from. In doing so he noticed a puff of greenish smoke near the Ferrari with a rear window still intact.

Usopp! Franky thought smirking, as he knew who had saved the car from its fate with the brick. Unfortunately he'd used one of those horrible stinky pellets that made him gag. Stuffing his shirt up to cover his nose as much as possible he observed a curvy figure of a woman stood proud, legs apart, hand on hips however an expression so livid that Franky was taken aback.

Stood in front of a clapped out car on top of a red building across the street was Nami in a full rage. Still holding everyone's gobsmacked attention she growled low but loud enough for everyone to hear "If any of you dare scratch that car I will personally murder you!"


End file.
